Would you attend Church where a Divorced Pastor preaches?

[LaurenTM]

gee...I think you came here to get some CHRISTIAN advice...and in that respect, I don't see strangers

I am not sure you will listen, quite truthfully, after reading about the red flags and then you married him anyway?

I'm going to say like Kayla...get serious or get done

and you do need to step down in the interim...as much as I do not judge you in what has happened...and I really don't, you are not in any shape to care for a congregation and shepherd them...I know God can and does restore

I would say get real tight with some members in your congregation and pray this through

and for what it's worth? stay off of facebook!

 

[leslee19]

Thank you, I was off for 4 weeks after I was in the hospital in May (2 Weeks after he left I almost died from sepsis due to a Matrix Kidney stone) I was in ICU and the hospital a week then off three weeks but my Ministry is as good for me as it is the people, it keeps me grounded and Jesus arms have walked me through this so far and I know he will continue to do so. I spent the afternoon out on our Church Ministry and Lord was I thankful to be doing his work!

 

[leslee19]

Thank you, I BELIEVE I just wish things were as they were when we were building the ministry. We worked so hard and well together planting our church. He was doing so awesome. I deep down know we should never have married but for years he did change. I deep down know this situation may not change and that is what hurts. I do not think he will talk to anyone. I have encouraged him to speak with a Pastor there. Praying he will. Right now as I said, I am not communicating with him. I make it too easy for him to have me as a crutch right now.

 

[LaurenTM]

Thank you, I BELIEVE I just wish things were as they were when we were building the ministry. We worked so hard and well together planting our church. He was doing so awesome. I deep down know we should never have married but for years he did change. I deep down know this situation may not change and that is what hurts. I do not think he will talk to anyone. I have encouraged him to speak with a Pastor there. Praying he will. Right now as I said, I am not communicating with him. I make it too easy for him to have me as a crutch right now.

I am so sorry for this situation...it is a very difficult one to be in.

I pray you can get some folks together from your congregation who will pray this through with you...

hugs

 

[Dan58]

I've always hated churches that treated divorcee's like second class citizens, i.e; 'Sit in the back, your not as good as the rest of us'. Divorce is not the unforgivable sin, it doesn't disqualify you. I think your being too hard on yourself, especially since your husband is pushing the separation. If your congregation is of the mindset to condemn or disqualify you, then they need your services more than ever. "Judge not, that ye be not judged" (Matthew 7:1). Peter separated himself from Christ by denying he even knew him, Jesus didn't fire him. Paul persecuted anyone who professed Christ, Jesus hired him. None of us are good enough, that's why we follow Christ instead of each other. Don't let a little thing like a separation or divorce tempt you from forsaking your calling. Sometimes the hardest person to forgive for our screw-ups is ourselves, but Christ doesn't condemn us, so neither should we.. jmo

 

[lv2ski]

Thank you, I BELIEVE I just wish things were as they were when we were building the ministry. We worked so hard and well together planting our church. He was doing so awesome. I deep down know we should never have married but for years he did change. I deep down know this situation may not change and that is what hurts. I do not think he will talk to anyone. I have encouraged him to speak with a Pastor there. Praying he will. Right now as I said, I am not communicating with him. I make it too easy for him to have me as a crutch right now.

As you probs prob know:

But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?
1Co 7:12*-‬16 NKJV
http://bible.com/114/1co.7.12-16.NKJV

You are responsible for your choices, not his. You must consider the fold. I don't think it's mandatory, as some denominations require, but you don't want to stumble anyone. It's vital how you conduct yourself through this. seek the Lord for direction, but hold until you KNOW otherwise.

Your Congregation needs to see your genuine faith and faithfulness through this. Don't forget, what you've been teaching, is now on display. People talk, but the Lord has the necessary knowledge of your situation.

Right now it doesn't matter whether you should have married him, you are. That's what God joined, that's your lot for now. I'm sure you've actually given that counsel. Shine Sis!

 

[leslee19]

Thank you so so much. God Bless you.

 

[Roughsoul1991]

I am a female Pastor currently separated from my husband. He claims he still loves me but we are still separated. I am so conflicted about filing for divorce as I know I am held to a higher standard. How to y'all feel?

I do not know your situation but I believe a believer should do all they can to save their marriage including counseling. I would not fear what others think. God chose sinners to save not the righteous. Remember love needs to be verb. We must act in love to produce love. It will take time. If you are being abused physically get a divorce. If he has been unfaithful I see no problem choosing to get a divorce. Also being abused verbally is a type of abuse that can lead to physical abuse. But if you feel like yall just have fell out of love. Well, I really believe if both persons ACT in LOVE toward each other eventually the feeling of love will be produced. To be honest I want a preacher that's real. I do not want a pretender. I want a preacher who I can look up to, to make the right choices but also experiences human temptations. I do not expect my preacher to be perfect. But what I do expect is him/her do their best, if needed to always repent, and do the right thing. There is no sin greater than what Jesus did for our sins. Don't worry about others God can and will still use your life to spread the Gospel. Many people feel the guilt of divorce or a failing marriage. People listen closely when the person speaking is dealing with the same thing. In fact I would announce it to the church saying how troubled you are feeling and need help. Let the body of Christ hold up one of our leaders of Christ. Of course you will get good support and bad. But never try to pretend to be someone you are not, and that is perfect. Only one man was perfect. Do your best with what God has given you. Also if your preaching is affecting your marriage. I know being a preacher is very time-consuming and you have to deal with other people's problems. If this is a problem you may want to consider stepping down for awhile to try rekindling the love for your husband. It won't be easy and if divorce is finally forced decision then remember no sin is greater than our salvation in Christ. Thank God for that because I can not sit her and Judge you because for all I know I could face the same thing one day. I can't judge you because I am not perfect and fight my own battles every day. I love my God and he knows my heart. As long as God knows my heart then I do not care what others think because I know in my heart I love God and will do my best to do what right. But if I was to fail I know God will not leave me there. AMEN AMEN thank God for that!

 

[believeume]

I am a female Pastor currently separated from my husband. He claims he still loves me but we are still separated. I am so conflicted about filing for divorce as I know I am held to a higher standard. How to y'all feel?

You know what Jesus taught about this. A lot of people don't like the ides of staying single.

 

[MessageOfTheCross]

Love does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, 1 Corinthians 13:13 NLT - 1 Corinthians 13:5 NASB

You are fighting a enemy that you can't see, but the effects of it you can see.

Most Believers are so earthly minded (or carnally minded) they never even realize where the enemy's attacks are actually coming from. They blame circumstances and people, and they waste their energy fighting natural conditions instead of supernatural causes.

We need to wake up to the warfare that's going on in the heavenly realm!

 

[IDEAtor]

Marriage is redefined in the USA. So legal divorce is not the issue. It is the matter of your commitment to God and your husband and his commitment to you. The congregation should not be your reason for staying together or for legally divorcing. Rather, you must consider the reason God would call you to remain married-- and weigh it against faithfulness in marriage.

Just a thought, not to be taken as advice: But maybe you and your husband can attend another church recovery group together. You are going to be wounded through the divorce, so your preaching will likely be too related or too fake. Instead of seeking the easy paper work route out, ask older saints to pray you through, as you do hard work on ground zero.

To answer your question, I would not knowingly feel great about a recently divorced pastor leading a church-- unless it was evident that God allowed it due to the man's own leaving or adultery. Even so... how can I trust a leader's commitment to the church, if they write off someone else? (Then again, I am sooooo grateful for the pastors I have learned from and how they have showed me mercy, while teaching from Scripture.) That said, I am genuinely sorry for your separation and the predicament you find yourself in.

 

[Sanfam]

The Bible is clear, no Women pastors or teachers over men. A woman can have leadership over other women and children but she is to have an overseer over her 1 Tim. 3. It tells us why in 1 Tim 2:11-15 for the woman was decieved and not man. If you are a Pastor over men, quit that ministry and obey your husband by submitting yourself to him. Let that be your calling and do it whole heartedly as you would do to your Lord!