D
I admit I shot coke and heroin to fight the pain.
In my slowly growing schizophrenic brain I'm terrified my reality is dying slow.
This may be my farewell I'm 20 years old scared to live because my flight.
No one's aboard, I'm alone, so all I do is write.
I feel the Holy Spirit but my damaged brain from drugs and disease never lets me write it how it feels,
it kills me inside.
I love so much just want to let my guard down before it's to late.
Because once I'm lost for good I'll be an angel in my mind locked in eternal war against sin already forgiven but I'm a wild one and the Lord decided that my soul was something nice to light.
Now I'm lit without the drunk, all alone, I don't have a voice, but a platinum tongue up in heaven,
please pray that when my mind shatters that my family doesn't cut themselves from the shards of and crushed diamonds that've been forming up there for a long time. I'm self centered, that's my sin, now I'm stuck fighting to sustain the suns ans stars that I created and God did like. The ones He doesn't are the ones who haunt my day to day life.
Just know one thing. As I slowly slip away, I may be foolish, I may be silly, but it's not funny when I see disgusting monsters and demons in night and day terrors rushing through my head frights.
Leaves me shaking on the floor full of pain and despair, where there is no light.
It may not be real but it feels like.
And if it destroys the part of my brain that discerns what is real life.
Put me down in anyway before I harm another human being, or end up hindering the peacefulness we all like.
In my slowly growing schizophrenic brain I'm terrified my reality is dying slow.
This may be my farewell I'm 20 years old scared to live because my flight.
No one's aboard, I'm alone, so all I do is write.
I feel the Holy Spirit but my damaged brain from drugs and disease never lets me write it how it feels,
it kills me inside.
I love so much just want to let my guard down before it's to late.
Because once I'm lost for good I'll be an angel in my mind locked in eternal war against sin already forgiven but I'm a wild one and the Lord decided that my soul was something nice to light.
Now I'm lit without the drunk, all alone, I don't have a voice, but a platinum tongue up in heaven,
please pray that when my mind shatters that my family doesn't cut themselves from the shards of and crushed diamonds that've been forming up there for a long time. I'm self centered, that's my sin, now I'm stuck fighting to sustain the suns ans stars that I created and God did like. The ones He doesn't are the ones who haunt my day to day life.
Just know one thing. As I slowly slip away, I may be foolish, I may be silly, but it's not funny when I see disgusting monsters and demons in night and day terrors rushing through my head frights.
Leaves me shaking on the floor full of pain and despair, where there is no light.
It may not be real but it feels like.
And if it destroys the part of my brain that discerns what is real life.
Put me down in anyway before I harm another human being, or end up hindering the peacefulness we all like.