Of course anyways that's the story of my life,physical pain,emotional pain,mental pain,I'm so accustomed to it that I can even ignore but now I'm actually making an effort to stop ignoring and start healing.
The capacity to grieve is almost lost in our culture. People use work, TV, drugs, alcohol, shopping, food binges, busyness, sexual escapades, unhealthy relationships, and even serving others at church - anything - to medicate the pain of life. Year after year we deny and avoid the difficulties and losses of life, the rejections and frustrations. When a loss enters our life we become angry with God and treat it as an alien invasion from outer space. We tend to numb -up then, instead of grace - up.
This is unbiblical and a denial of our common humanity. The God-like response to loss is neither spin nor a cover-up. Scripture teaches us to deal honestly and prayerfully with our losses and disappointments big and small, and all their accompanying confusing emotions. Why? Losses are indispensable if we are going to change and grow into the men and women God has called us to be.
Joe - I will pray that you can embrace your limitations, while at the same time embrace God's limitlessness for this is a healthy relationship with God..I will also pray for healing of past trauma's as well....May God richly bless you.