feeling lonely... holed up in my tiny world where i am broke, confused, stuck, cut off from everyone and with nothing to be excited about and no reason to feel ok about my life. just seeking connection here. Christian coziness... otherwise all im doing is watching youtube videos about near death experiences, miracles, paranormal phenomena, seeking hope outside my bleak confined reality.
I awoke this Morning tired from the hub-bub of the things flying about my time and world. Some things demanding, some things even worldly by way of simply being by them without being of them, and yet still - other things joyous - yet it all the hub-bub of ongoings. Then this Morning I got up and prayed ... and I had to sit for even a longer period to get to praying because I was exhausted from the day before, and the hub-bub was still about my aura. I was not yet ready to rest in Christ; I was not yet ready to receive Christ ..... but in time God helped me to rest, as I sat in disciplined silence nonetheless ... so I sat in His presence .... and received Him in time.
Oh the power behind those words "I received Him!" My tears well up even as I utter those words. In His presence today, I realize God's purpose for my life - you see the Spirit is the first power we practically experience but the last power we come to understand. When I read (1 Peter 1:16) "Ye shall be Holy; for I am Holy," I realize I am not only - NOT alone in this world, but I am not my own as well. Every detail of my life is under the scrutiny of God. You see, Holiness is not only what God gives me, but what I manifest that God has given me. God is all about practical and productivity. God is all about experiential.
I have read many of your blogs or oracle deliveries on depression and sullenness, as if it is not a choice. Yet, I say confidently brother - it is a choice. Let me ask you a question: Are you striving to find your life in Christ, or are you striving to die to the right to yourself and gain Christ? And gain Christ in His fullness seeking His face over your happiness?
Matthew 16:25 comes immediately to mind when I type these words, for it says, "...whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for Me will find it." Notice how it didn't say "whoever
wants to lose their life for Me will find it." It says whoever
loses their life for me will find it.
Sir, I believe holiness means unsullied walking with the feet, unsullied talking with the tongue, unsullied thinking in the mind - all thru the Cross - in the death of our right to ourself, and all then within Christ's redemptive promises and purposes and intentions. If you want to find anything in life - that including a woman - you must seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness - with all of yourself. Now, with that said - you can file this away under the inspirational file in your place, or you can heed the message and start changing choices in your life to gain what you desire, as you desire first Christ.
I will pray on your behalf, based on His will for you to gain His prosperity and not to be harmed...that you receive His hope found in Himself alone. Your bleak reality is not reality at all, let not the lie of Satan prevent you from seeing the truth and reality about you in Christ. "I pray Lord, You take this power preventing deptheur from seeing and holding You in his hopes and dreams and realities, and crush it and flee it from him!!!! .... in Jesus name I pray - Amen." Now go and fear nothing but God ...
https://youtu.be/eBvGzrnirT8