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Well...it may not be what you asked for, but here's a different perspective:
I am not waiting around to get my life settled before I find someone. I mean, I have a full-time job, my own car, a house (that I rent), 3 pets. And I only thought of myself when I got those things. I didn't think, "Maybe I should wait until I find my husband before completely decorating my house and calling it my home because if I meet someone and we get married and we move in together I'll have to get rid of some of this stuff." And sure, maybe having 3 pets isn't ideal since if I meet someone else who also has a few pets we'd have... quite a full household, but I don't want to let "what ifs" in the future keep me from doing what I'm doing NOW. It wouldn't make sense to me to not fully live life/be established/own what I own if I'm always thinking about "What if my future husband doesn't want to ride in this car that I have" or "What if my future husband hates this rug that I just bought."
I mean, I live on my own. I need a couch. I can't NOT have some of the stuff that I have in hopes that one day the man I marry does. I have to do what I can with the life I have now. Hopefully that makes sense?
I am not waiting around to get my life settled before I find someone. I mean, I have a full-time job, my own car, a house (that I rent), 3 pets. And I only thought of myself when I got those things. I didn't think, "Maybe I should wait until I find my husband before completely decorating my house and calling it my home because if I meet someone and we get married and we move in together I'll have to get rid of some of this stuff." And sure, maybe having 3 pets isn't ideal since if I meet someone else who also has a few pets we'd have... quite a full household, but I don't want to let "what ifs" in the future keep me from doing what I'm doing NOW. It wouldn't make sense to me to not fully live life/be established/own what I own if I'm always thinking about "What if my future husband doesn't want to ride in this car that I have" or "What if my future husband hates this rug that I just bought."
I mean, I live on my own. I need a couch. I can't NOT have some of the stuff that I have in hopes that one day the man I marry does. I have to do what I can with the life I have now. Hopefully that makes sense?
J
I suppose I should reply to my own thread
Thanks everyone for your reply’s
Thanks rachelsedge for your different point of view. I do something similar in that I live my life as if I am always going to be a bachelor, but this has lead me in a different direction, instead of gaining more things or pets, I have found myself downsizing to where I have very little. This and my attempt at starting my own business and some tasks which the Lord has given me are what sparked the thought about a couple building a life together. Of course everyone is different and so there is no set way or better way, but the growing together sounds romantic and special when an elderly couple tells stories of how they had nothing whey they were married and had to work together to afford a house and food, or how they had to support one another when they were beset by worldly problems.
It seems that a husband and wife bond closely when they have to work together through difficult times in life. Maybe I should just leave this here for now, it is late and I am running out of words… Good night everyone
Jacob
Thanks everyone for your reply’s
Thanks rachelsedge for your different point of view. I do something similar in that I live my life as if I am always going to be a bachelor, but this has lead me in a different direction, instead of gaining more things or pets, I have found myself downsizing to where I have very little. This and my attempt at starting my own business and some tasks which the Lord has given me are what sparked the thought about a couple building a life together. Of course everyone is different and so there is no set way or better way, but the growing together sounds romantic and special when an elderly couple tells stories of how they had nothing whey they were married and had to work together to afford a house and food, or how they had to support one another when they were beset by worldly problems.
It seems that a husband and wife bond closely when they have to work together through difficult times in life. Maybe I should just leave this here for now, it is late and I am running out of words… Good night everyone
Jacob
K
I think this is a wisdom issue. It's not going to be the same for everyone, but as long as the couple can at least support themselves without depending on their families, and as long as they are smart about their money managing, I think they can marry. I wouldn't marry if we weren't able to support ourselves at least, and I think that's wise. And I would prefer to get married when we are both at least a little more stable in our careers, but that's just me, and that could change. I'm not opposed to getting married while one of us, or both, are still going to school (assuming we can still support ourselves), and I know couples who have done that, and managed to work though it. So yeah...wisdom.