failure

[psychomom]

please forgive me if you've already discussed this?
i was hoping to get some of your insights on failure. we tend to dislike it; we want to avoid it, but....

is failure bad or good?

are there Biblical examples of failure that teach you or comfort you?

as it pertains to everyday life, has God used failure in your life, and how?

as it pertains to sin, has God used your failures, and how?

is there anything you've learned about God through failing?

is there anything you've learned about relating to other people through failing?

no matter which, if any, questions you choose to answer,
i'd appreciate your thoughts in general.

ps-- i posted this here, because i knew it would be discussed and not argued.

 

[Lynx]

"Good judgement comes from experience. And most experience comes from bad judgement."

I'm reminded of a fairly young businessman who made a mistake that cost his company a rather large account. He promptly wrote out his resignation and submitted it to his boss. His boss read the resignation and said, "Denied. You learned a lesson that cost us a lot of money. You won't make that mistake again and we would like to keep someone with your experience here."

 

[Lynx]

Personally I've always been a great believer in learning from the mistakes of others. They're gonna make mistakes anyway, no way I could prevent that, so I might as well keep my eyes and ears wide open and learn from them. Borrowed experience it may be, but it has kept me from a lot of failures in my own life.

This is not to say I'm perfect - I've had some fantastic failures in my life. I'm not going to discuss them here because they are a bit personal, but I've had some. But I've managed to avoid a lot of them, and some pretty major ones.

 

[rachelsedge]

I may come back with more personal/specified examples later, but just as a general post...

My mom said that your circumstances can either "make you bitter or make you better." God can use our failure to grow us and teach us, or we can use our failure to become bitter, jaded, and hardened. I do not think that God orchestrates our failures. I believe He is sovereign but I don't think He "makes" us sin, so it bothers me a bit when people say, in so many words, "I think God led me/let me into drugs so I could come out the other side a better person." Well, no, drugs are sinful so I don't think God wanted you to sin just to become a better person. But, I believe that God can use the past (or present) sins/failures as a teaching device, both to teach us about the depravity of humanity and the holiness of Himself.

For example, I did something terribly sinful today (as I do everyday, as all sin is terrible in God's eyes, but you catch my drift) and I felt so guilty after, and for a couple minutes I thought, "Ugh how does God love me" but...that's the point. He still does even when I willfully go against Him. Am I glad I sinned so I could realize this again today? Heck no techno. But it was definitely used.

I'm rambling now. Hopefully that makes sense.

 

[Lynx]

Talking about God using failures, of course He can. I can't witness to, for example, a drug addict as well as some in my church could, because I've never been where he is. Other people have been there, they know how it feels and how hard it is to break, and they know the power of God and how it can break addictions. To me (can I be honest here?) drug addiction seems like something that should be easy to overcome if they would just get off their backsides and put their minds to it. It seems that way to me because I've never been there. I know how it seems to me is not right, but I don't know what it's really like because I've never been there. Someone who has cheated on a spouse or been cheated on, someone who has committed (insert sin here,) someone who backslid... I can't witness to them as well as others can because other people know exactly what it's like.

Does this mean it's in God's will that you fail so you will be useful to witness to others? Um... I wouldn't think so. But if you've already failed, okay, so you stumbled. Pick yourself up and try again, and use what you learned to help others who have stumbled over the same block.

 

[Lynx]

I'm reminded of John 13:36 and on down, when Peter told Jesus he would follow Him anywhere. Jesus said, "Oh yeah? Before it's morning you're gonna tell people three times that you don't even know me." (loose paraphrase.) But although the chapter stops there, that next verse belongs with it. "Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me."

I know that jumped chapters. When that book was written it wasn't divided into chapters and verses, and biblical scholars agree that the monks who divided the Bible up sometimes got the divisions wrong.

Ever notice there were two failures in the garden that night? Peter went out and wept bitterly. Then he got up and kept going. Judas went out and hanged himself. Peter went on to preach the first message on the day of Pentecost. Judas' life ended at his failure. Peter was so close to God that if his shadow passed over people on the side of the road they were healed. Judas had nothing after the garden.

Both failed. One got back up, the other gave up.

 

[Lynx]

Here's a thought. David was known as a man after God's own heart.

Eh? Wait a minute... the same David that had an affair with Bathsheba? The one who arranged the death of her husband, then married her? THAT'S a man after God's own heart?

If you understand why, even through his failure, David was a man after God's own heart, you understand a little bit more about what God's heart is.

 

[Lynx]

Sorry for the flood of posts. You've tapped into a sermon I have been working on, but haven't preached yet. So you got some rough drafts of notes... I'll hush now and let someone else talk.

 

[psychomom]

Sorry for the flood of posts. You've tapped into a sermon I have been working on, but haven't preached yet. So you got some rough drafts of notes... I'll hush now and let someone else talk.

no, no, i'm really glad to hear what you have to say!!

i'm gonna go to sleep now so i can go to my daughter's tomorrow
and kiss my grandson a zillion times. but i'll check in tomorrow.

okay, a zillion may be slightly hyperbolic. and also not an actual number....

 

[zeroturbulence]

Its said that Thomas Edison went through 1,000 failed attempts at creating the light bulb and when asked if he regretted failing all those times he said, "I have not failed. I just found 1,000 ways that won't work."

 

[wisebeardman]

Its said that Thomas Edison went through 1,000 failed attempts at creating the light bulb and when asked if he regretted failing all those times he said, "I have not failed. I just found 1,000 ways that won't work."

insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result.

 

[Lynx]

It would have been insane if he had tried the same way over and over again. What made it work was trying a thousand different ways.

 

[wwjd_kilden]

is failure bad or good?
- Both?

are there Biblical examples of failure that teach you or comfort you?
- Peter
- the Israelites in the OT (if God kept up with them than just maaaybe He will keep up with me)

as it pertains to everyday life, has God used failure in your life, and how?
- By being able to say to people who want to do stuff they shouldn't (for some situations): "I've been there, trust me, you don't wanna go there, no matter how good it sounds"

as it pertains to sin, has God used your failures, and how?
- Well, I failed my practice period as a nurse and now I am in Scotland ... that's an interesting turn of events.

is there anything you've learned about God through failing?
- If I just cry out to God, and then shut up myself for a bit, He will answer

is there anything you've learned about relating to other people through failing?
- We're all battered and chinked and maybe a bit crazy, that's what makes us human.

 

[CatHerder]

is failure bad or good?

yes

are there Biblical examples of failure that teach you or comfort you?

I am encouraged by how patient God was with his bumbling servants - Abraham lying about his relationship with Sarah, Moses losing his temper, David's lust driving him to orchestrate the death of Urias, the judgmental nature and disobedience of Jonah, Peter's denial of Jesus...I am encouraged because this reminds me that God is also patient with me and all of my shortcomings.

as it pertains to everyday life, has God used failure in your life, and how?

I hope that I learn from bad experiences. I know in some cases I have. I have also repeated more lessons than I care to count. I suppose that my biggest failure would be my marriage. Looking back, I can see how God has used even this. It's lead to a lot of soul searching and spiritual/emotional growth. I've become that person that people can (and have) called at 3:00 a.m. with a crisis. I've also become bolder in my faith, not just with non-believers, but with other Christians. In real life (not chat), I've scared people with what I have noticed of their behavior sometimes, yet have been told I have a weird mix of compassion and bluntness. Sometimes people need both of these.

as it pertains to sin, has God used your failures, and how?

I think just knowing how twisted I can be, I'm less judgmental of others.

is there anything you've learned about God through failing?

That though we may fail Him, He will never fail us. gosh! that sounds so cheesy!

is there anything you've learned about relating to other people through failing?

that they may fail in different ways than me. that interdependence is important.


It's good to go down to defeat now and then
To fail at some nobel pursuit
To fall short of the prize
And find in His eyes
There's nothing your victory can do
To secure higher favor
He cannot love you more than now
Winners and losers
All are the same somehow

from Wayne Watson's Every Now and Again

 

[psychomom]

thanks, everyone!

one thing i've learned about myself is i don't really have to try to fail...
i'm doing pretty well at it as it is.

but this getting better at giving grace to other people gig is sweet.

 

[ServantStrike]

thanks, everyone!

one thing i've learned about myself is i don't really have to try to fail...
i'm doing pretty well at it as it is.

but this getting better at giving grace to other people gig is sweet.

Well this may be a bit of a tangent, but if you think about it, we should all fail in some way or another in a routine basis.


If we aren't failing then we haven't been trying to reach beyond our current abilities.


Now failing spiritually is different, the consequences are dire and completely unnecessary. If you look back at the old testament though, almost every patriarch failed in some pretty grievous ways, yet those failures have stood the test of time as an example both to their people and to us today. In many cases those failures taught these people directly and forced them to repent, ending up in a deeper relationship with God in the process.


Off hand, I can't think of many situations in the bible where failure ended up in perpetual ruin except for Saul and some of the more wicked kings and judges. In the new testament there was that incident with Annias and Sapphira, but I can't think of any others.

 

[MollyConnor]

I think failure lets us focus on the Lord and lean on him more. I don't really like to fail lol but I know sometimes it's necessary.

My mom had thyroid cancer back in 2010. She had radiation treatment and overcame it! The cancer was gone. Then in 2011 the doctors told her she might have uterine cancer. Needless to say my family and I were broken. We couldn't believe that the cancer might be back and that it could have spread! I was so nervous, I remember having a difficult time focusing on school because all I could think about was my mom. So as we were failing to find peace as a family, we leaned on the Lord. We prayed as a family, we fasted and we leaned on Him and our church family.

There were times where I broke down (not in front of others) and cried out to the Lord, asking him to please take of my mom. My dad isn't in the picture, so my mom means so much to me. Finally the doctors did the surgery and it turned out that her uterus was fine! There was no cancer!

My family and I were thrilled! It's been 5 years since the thyroid cancer and she hasn't gotten it back, praise God!

So sometimes failing can be a good thing. My relationship with the Lord improved after this incident. I also trusted him more.

Whatever it is that you are going through, go to a quiet place and cry out to him. It helps

Blessings!

 

[psychomom]

Molly, what a lovely story.

i thank God with you your mom is well. ♥

i have often failed when it comes to trusting God,
but He was faithful even when i was not.

 

[PoetMary]

The way to insulate yourself from failure, humiliation, judgement, and shame is actually quite simple:

do nothing
say nothing
think nothing
contribute nothing

Then you are guaranteed to be safe.

 

[Lynx]

Yes PoetMary, this works for a lot of people.