Finances and Women

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Ratchet

Guest
#1
I was wondering what amount of debt a man could have before a woman will change her mind to date him. Also what amount of income do many women on here prefer a man to make. Do you hope they have already invested in a retirement account? I need to know the truth about women's expectation about a man's finances. I might not be too bad but I definitely will be changing some things about my money. I have heard many christian women have an inclination towards guys who can already make a down payment on a home. Does that mean that those who cant are inferior christian specimens? It sure is tough being a christian. I wonder if I can hold on long enough.
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#2
women and finances... those two words dont mix well...


personally i would want the guy to put a down payment on one of these bad boys

 
L

lightbliss

Guest
#3
I think if you're considering a relationship, talking about your finances is important (mind you, you don't have to state the approximate number).

Regarding debt, well I'm young so if I'm interested in a guy, he'd probably be around my age; not much debt, if any at all.. well there's tuition but that's a given.

Initially, it doesn't matter much debt a guy is in but if I wanted a serious relationship with him (JSYK, I view all potential relationships as serious), debt would definitely play a factor in considering a bf/gf relationship with him.

I think, depending on the amount owed, debt would be the deal-breaker.

  1. If it's a few hundred dollars and he's actively paying it off, then fine.
  2. If it's several hundred dollars that he's actively paying off, 60-40.
  3. If it's a few - several thousand dollars that he's actively paying off, we'll see.
  4. If it's a few hundred dollars and he's not paying it off, then probably not.
  5. If it's several hundred dollars that he's not paying off, 0.999% chance.
  6. If it's a few - several thousand dollars that he's not paying off, no.
Please note: I stated actively paying off (on-time monthly payments). Regardless of how much debt anyone is in, you can see where their priorities are by whether they're paying it off or if it keeps loading up. How can I expect someone to care for me (in all aspects, not just financially) if they can't manage their finances?

Whether you think I'm right or wrong, when two come together in marriage, one's debt becomes the other's. So yeah, it's important to stay on top of it.

As for a retirement account (401K, IRA, etc.,), I think as soon as someone has a job, they should open one and make contributions but they should definitely have one by the time their 35. A retirement account isn't for your girlfriend or wife, it's for you; to make sure you're off upon retirement.

It's really not about expectations in a relationship. It's your life. You're an adult, you should have most (if not all) things together, especially you finances. It's important ;)
 
D

dmdave17

Guest
#4
I think debt at a young age is more of a responsibility issue than a financial issue. There are exceptions of course, a mortgage on a home, student loans, but in general, a young person who is deeply in debt may have other responsibility problems also. A young woman would be wise to beware. But, whoever said that women and finances don't mix needs to read Proverbs 31's definition of the "noble woman". For example, "She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.". (Proverbs 31:16) "She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night." (Proverbs 31:18) Sounds to me like the noble woman is pretty financially savvy.
 
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thimsrebma

Guest
#5
When you are talking about sharing your life with someone finances are definitly important. Many marital issues stem from financial problems and being over extended. I think many money issues are because people are not responsible and do not adhere to a strict budget. You can get by on little if you try.

I have my own student loan debt and am trying to work hard to pay that off. I wouldn't want someone who is not at least trying to be responsible and take care of bills they have created. We want to be the lenders and not the borrowers right?

Because God is so awesome, I became a homeowner last year on my 26th birthday. So yes I already have a home that would be fine for us to live in but I would like a man who has been preparing a place for me. That isnt to say he already owns one, but at least has been working towards it.

This may sound harsh but I feel that I am doing good job providing for myslef and the man that I marry needs to be able to take care of me at least as good as I can. God gave me the intellect and resolve to make it thru university, a solid career path, and a business for a little extra income. These things did not come without a price. I worked 3 jobs while I was in college, and now I have a full time job and a part time business which all take up alot of time and energy. I would definitely prefer a man who is going to be working at least as hard as I am to try and secure some things for the future.
 
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NukePooch

Guest
#6
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jimmydiggs

Guest
#7
Hitch sold seperately.
 
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thimsrebma

Guest
#8
I think its inappropriate to be making fun of peoples homes you guys. Thats not nice.
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#10
it means you turned off your rep points, so that no one can leave you any
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#12
you go to the edit options thingy and at the bottom i think it says something about rep....
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#14
are you ...........scaaaared of it??????? :D
 
J

Jennifleur

Guest
#16
I was wondering what amount of debt a man could have before a woman will change her mind to date him. Also what amount of income do many women on here prefer a man to make. Do you hope they have already invested in a retirement account? I need to know the truth about women's expectation about a man's finances. I might not be too bad but I definitely will be changing some things about my money. I have heard many christian women have an inclination towards guys who can already make a down payment on a home. Does that mean that those who cant are inferior christian specimens? It sure is tough being a christian. I wonder if I can hold on long enough.
I'm not really sure what you mean by "amount of debt". Are you saying that you think you should be carrying a certain amount of debt before you appear "desirable" to a Christian woman, or are you asking if you should carry as little debt as possible? There are certain types of debt that are sometimes unavoidable, such as student loans for college, car loans, home mortgages, etc. Other than that, especially looking at credit card debts and such, a large amount of debt would make me nervous, because it would make me wonder if he is responsible with finances, and I'd be worried about getting involved with someone who is irresponsible. If I'm going to build a life and have a family with someone, I need to know that I'm not going to be on the street with hungry children some day. In that sense, finances and debt are very important, and something to consider.

As for a woman's expectations, every woman is different. Each woman you meet will have a different idea. For instance, you're saying that, from your current knowledge/stereotypes of what women want, a guy who can make a down payment on a home right from the beginning can be a deal maker or breaker. Well, for me, it's the opposite. My boyfriend is the one who would like to have a house at the beginning, and I've been telling him that it's not necessary and it might be better to wait and maybe rent a small apartment to begin with, to get on our feet when we finally do get married. Not every woman is vain, shallow and materialistic. But, you'll just have to get to know whatever girl you might be interested in, and find out about her personally. I would think that, if the woman is also a strong Christian, then she would be less concerned about the temporary material things of the world and more concerned with the eternal. Women want security, but big, fancy house + lots of toys and trinkets and expensive cars do not equal security for most women.
 
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Credo_ut_Intelligam

Guest
#17
If I've learned anything from rap music it's that women only like guys with lots and lots of money, gold chains, gold bracelets, gold teeth, and gold rims, all of which is only outmatched by the size of your ego (and oversized clothes are also plus). All of this is hard to acquire, but once you do you can treat women like garbage and most youths will still idolize you... so it's worth it.

Use this wisdom wisely.
 
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thimsrebma

Guest
#18
If I've learned anything from rap music it's that women only like guys with lots and lots of money, gold chains, gold bracelets, gold teeth, and gold rims, all of which is only outmatched by the size of your ego (and oversized clothes are also plus). All of this is hard to acquire, but once you do you can treat women like garbage and most youths will still idolize you... so it's worth it.

Use this wisdom wisely.
You are so funny. I love your posts.
 
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xXErraticEmilyXx

Guest
#19
The think about debt is that if you're deep in it then it makes you look irresponsible. In reality it doesn't matter how much money you have - it's the way you spend it and the choices you make with it. Or at least that's the way I see it.
 
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eric135

Guest
#20
Debt usually means you bought things you don't need with money you don't have.