B
Good day everyone.
Once again this book doesn't change anything of your principles and to greatkraw and eugenius I undestand where you coming from and respect your views as I would most probably also react in the same manner as you if I read the title alone, but as i said before please do not judge a book by its cover. Its great to quote all the favourite scriptures about "wait on God" and "Seek ye first the kingdom..." but if you had a friend that liked a woman and soooo much wanted to be with her, and he being a great man of God and she just a wonderful woman of God but he always stike out with girls coz he don't know how to approach a woman, then what are you gonna "teach" him to help him to win that woman over?
There are so many broken marriages out there and children growing up in broken homes, if a son particularly didn't have a father figure in his life he will most likely grow up confused and with little confidence, and that my friends is the key to winning a woman, CONFIDENCE, if you don't have that you are most likely gonna fail in alot of stuff, and this book teaches you how to elevate your confidence so that you could win a woman...its more than just a book that teaches you to win women, it helps you in every area of your life. I'm sure that in your own surroundings you have noticed that there's a major difference between guys that have/had good father figures while growing up to the guys who had no or a poor father figure when growing up. Its the same with woman. Pastor Michael Pitts of Cornerstone church in the USA explained this: he was referring to Adam and Eve when they were still in the Garden of Eden,when the snake convinced Eve to eat the forbidden fruit (Adam wasnt there at the time). He said that if u dont spend time with your wife/daughter then some snake(bad boy) will.
So far the people that know about my book and haven't read it are reacting in the way you guys are, but i got good reports from those who have read it. If you would see the title: "Women are from Venus, and Men are from Mars" I bet you would be freaked out too as it might come across as a horoscope book but its one of the leading Christian relationship books around, so please give me the benefit of the doubt.
As for Vidy, thanx for asking, below in red is some exctracts from the book, two from Good Guys' mistakes that we do, and two from Bad Boyz traits, let me know what you think:
1. Good Guys Traits
1.7 Desperate; Looking for long-term relationships
I’ve tied these two in as the one is to do with the other. Women are looking for sweet and reliable guys that could give them an everlasting relationship and ten-to-one you are that guy but bringing that across to her is a totally different story. Any person can see if a guy/woman is desperate…especially someone that is so desperate to get married. Its on their face, its in their speech, you can see it in their eyes, and frankly it scares the living daylights out of a person even though that person wants the same thing as the desperate person.
One of the mistakes Good Guys make is that if they got it right to get a date with a girl they make up their minds that “this is it” and that they are gonna marry this girl, and they blatantly show it. They bring up the marriage topic every 5 minutes at the dinner table on the first couple of dates, they look into the girls eyes all lovingly saying how good a husband and father they can be to her and their “future kids”. In essence you are scaring the girl away. Every woman wants a knight in shining armour to come out on nowhere and sweep them off their feet, get married, ride into the sunset and live happily ever after…but in reality if you do that to a girl you will freak her out. They will send out a massive man-hunt to catch you and throw you in jail. Now I know there are isolated circumstances where both the man and woman knew from the beginning that they want to be together and had a happy marriage ever after but I am guessing it didn’t happen to you. If it does then congratulations but there’s a very big chance that you will scare the woman off with those actions.
Tips for not being desperate: be content with yourself and know that you will find and win that woman over one day. Make up your mind to slow it down a bit and get to know her when you do meet a woman you like. Know in your heart that even if you don’t get a woman that you will be ok and that God still cares about you. Strengthen your relationship with God and with yourself…it’s said that if you can’t be alone and content with yourself then you will be a problem to others, take time to be with yourself every week. My “me” day is Friday nights: I rent DVDs, buy food and I just spend time with myself and now and then my nephew will join me. If you are restless and have to be out with your friends or someone everyday or weekend or at every party, then you have a problem…don’t be so restless. The more you are content with yourself the more that desperateness will be wiped out of your eyes coz you won’t need anyone to make you happy as you are happy already…and in that way when you get your woman you will make her extra happy because you are content, confident, and happy already.
1.5 Too Superspiritual
Now I love God and He loves me. We are tight and most of the time I disappoint Him but He always finds it in His heart to forgive me. I would say that our relationship is more or less balanced…not perfect coz whose relationship with God is ever perfect…but it’s ok. But I don’t have to talk about what He has done for me all the time. And I don’t have to listen to gospel music, wear the WWJD band around my wrist, the “Jesus died for me on the Cross” t-shirt, use the Christian slang with everyone, etc. all the time to prove that I am a Christian to me or everyone.
Now many people can prove me wrong but in my opinion and experience I would say that it’s a “heart thing” and you project what is in your heart without saying a word. People can mostly tell what type of person you are just by looking at you. There’s just something different about you and people know it. It’s the light of Jesus shining from within your heart, the Holy Spirit in you, and God’s mighty hand upon you. Paul even said that he is no “Super-apostles” (2Corinthians 12vs11) meaning that no-one is different and that we all just part of a Great Commission that Jesus gave us (Matthew 28vs16-20). So you don’t have to go way out to prove that you are a Christian.
Girls often complain that Christian guys aren’t real enough. In fact they say that they are false. They hide behind their scriptural jargon and never show their true self. I was one of them too. I thought that if I am involved in five ministries, pray well in front of others, be a good youth leader, be able to quote as many scriptures as I can, etc. then girls would fall for me left, right and centre. To an extent it is appealing to some Christian women but the real and balanced ones wants real and balanced Christian guys…not saying that you shouldn’t pray in public or be involved in church work. Now it’s good to study the Word of God and its good to feed your soul but the bible says in Ecclesiastes 3vs 1-8 that there’s a time for everything. Use the scriptures wisely, use what is taught to you in this book and everyday wisely.
Let me give you an analogy of KNOWLEGDE and WISDOM in the form of a light bulb and electrical switch in your bedroom: Knowledge is knowing how the light bulb and switch work…you turn on the electrical switch and it allows electricity to move at a super high speed to the bulb making the element burn thus giving off light to your bedroom. Wisdom is KNOWING when to activate that electrical switch…its of no use activating that switch during the day when the sun is shining into your room, you don’t need it and you are wasting energy, the wise thing to do is to switch on the bulb in the evening when its dark or whenever it rains and the sun is hidden, etc. My point is: use your knowledge wisely and when it is applicable.
One of the examples I can give you where we can show that Christian guys are superspiritual is when a lady asks a guy; “Hello Byron, how are you today?” Byron’s answer would be; “Patricia, The Lord is still on the throne.” The girl didn’t ask Byron if the Lord was still on the throne, she asked how he was…as a matter of fact; I think we all would be in trouble if the Lord wasn’t on the throne. Rather answer her with this; “I’m fine Patricia and how are you today?” Another example is; “So how have your day been Byron?” Bryon’s answer; “The devil persecuted me by working through my manager but the Lord will bring me victory and revival is on its way.” Mmmmmm…okay, rather answer her in this way; “My day have been hectic but I’m all the more better seeing you now Patricia.” Do you get my point? Be real, you don’t have to show your true feelings but keep your answers and conversations to the point and relevant to the topic.
2. Bad Boyz traits
2.8 Makes them feel like they are wanted and special…like they can identify with them. Manipulative/Deceptive.
With being charming, flirtatious, and persuasive Bad Boyz often use manipulative actions and deceptive methods to stalk their prey. They have an ability to see which women is “easy meat”, which are lonely, restricted by their parents, which girls are bored with the norm, parent (daddy) problems, are bored in their marriage, sexually deprived, etc. They mostly prey on these women; make them feel like they are special, that they can identify with them as they are also social outcasts. With this they can easily draw women away, divide and conquer is their motto. Take the women slowly and slowly away from the norm and show them a world that seems more exciting. They deceive women by convincing them that they would have an exciting and fulfilling life with them, often painting a picture of a never ending blissful paradise life, making unrealistic promises that seem so real to women.
How can this help you? First rule is that you shouldn’t be deceptive. Be honest with her no matter what. Don’t ever make promises you can’t keep. What you can learn from this is to make your life exciting as possible so that when she steps into your world she will be excited to stay there, I’m not saying you should spend thousands on her to keep her happy but just make your world as interesting as possible. Remember to be a breath of fresh air to her, but also mysterious…someone who is not bound by the norm. And yes, make her feel wanted…tell her that you want to be with her. Make her feel like she is the princess of your world but mind that you do not overdo the sweet toothache thing discussed in 1.6 Too Sweet. We’ll talk more about that later.
2.9 Renegade; Short tempered; Carries dangerous weapons; Rebellious; Unfaithful; Despises Authority; Bad reputation; Disrespectful; No remorse; Bad credit rating; Intimidating; Parents despises them
These are all traits that make up the core of the Bad Boyz. Some of it does attract women and for the main reason that they see it as a project to change the characters of the Bad Boyz but it seldom happens. Delving into these traits to use them to win women over will only draw you into a world that will moist probably destroy you. I have found that being a Good Guy and using the knowledge in this book have given me a well over-advantage against the Bad Boyz and that is all you will need. And if you struggle with any of those traits mentioned above I would suggest that you seek help to conquer them.
Once again this book doesn't change anything of your principles and to greatkraw and eugenius I undestand where you coming from and respect your views as I would most probably also react in the same manner as you if I read the title alone, but as i said before please do not judge a book by its cover. Its great to quote all the favourite scriptures about "wait on God" and "Seek ye first the kingdom..." but if you had a friend that liked a woman and soooo much wanted to be with her, and he being a great man of God and she just a wonderful woman of God but he always stike out with girls coz he don't know how to approach a woman, then what are you gonna "teach" him to help him to win that woman over?
There are so many broken marriages out there and children growing up in broken homes, if a son particularly didn't have a father figure in his life he will most likely grow up confused and with little confidence, and that my friends is the key to winning a woman, CONFIDENCE, if you don't have that you are most likely gonna fail in alot of stuff, and this book teaches you how to elevate your confidence so that you could win a woman...its more than just a book that teaches you to win women, it helps you in every area of your life. I'm sure that in your own surroundings you have noticed that there's a major difference between guys that have/had good father figures while growing up to the guys who had no or a poor father figure when growing up. Its the same with woman. Pastor Michael Pitts of Cornerstone church in the USA explained this: he was referring to Adam and Eve when they were still in the Garden of Eden,when the snake convinced Eve to eat the forbidden fruit (Adam wasnt there at the time). He said that if u dont spend time with your wife/daughter then some snake(bad boy) will.
So far the people that know about my book and haven't read it are reacting in the way you guys are, but i got good reports from those who have read it. If you would see the title: "Women are from Venus, and Men are from Mars" I bet you would be freaked out too as it might come across as a horoscope book but its one of the leading Christian relationship books around, so please give me the benefit of the doubt.
As for Vidy, thanx for asking, below in red is some exctracts from the book, two from Good Guys' mistakes that we do, and two from Bad Boyz traits, let me know what you think:
1. Good Guys Traits
1.7 Desperate; Looking for long-term relationships
I’ve tied these two in as the one is to do with the other. Women are looking for sweet and reliable guys that could give them an everlasting relationship and ten-to-one you are that guy but bringing that across to her is a totally different story. Any person can see if a guy/woman is desperate…especially someone that is so desperate to get married. Its on their face, its in their speech, you can see it in their eyes, and frankly it scares the living daylights out of a person even though that person wants the same thing as the desperate person.
One of the mistakes Good Guys make is that if they got it right to get a date with a girl they make up their minds that “this is it” and that they are gonna marry this girl, and they blatantly show it. They bring up the marriage topic every 5 minutes at the dinner table on the first couple of dates, they look into the girls eyes all lovingly saying how good a husband and father they can be to her and their “future kids”. In essence you are scaring the girl away. Every woman wants a knight in shining armour to come out on nowhere and sweep them off their feet, get married, ride into the sunset and live happily ever after…but in reality if you do that to a girl you will freak her out. They will send out a massive man-hunt to catch you and throw you in jail. Now I know there are isolated circumstances where both the man and woman knew from the beginning that they want to be together and had a happy marriage ever after but I am guessing it didn’t happen to you. If it does then congratulations but there’s a very big chance that you will scare the woman off with those actions.
Tips for not being desperate: be content with yourself and know that you will find and win that woman over one day. Make up your mind to slow it down a bit and get to know her when you do meet a woman you like. Know in your heart that even if you don’t get a woman that you will be ok and that God still cares about you. Strengthen your relationship with God and with yourself…it’s said that if you can’t be alone and content with yourself then you will be a problem to others, take time to be with yourself every week. My “me” day is Friday nights: I rent DVDs, buy food and I just spend time with myself and now and then my nephew will join me. If you are restless and have to be out with your friends or someone everyday or weekend or at every party, then you have a problem…don’t be so restless. The more you are content with yourself the more that desperateness will be wiped out of your eyes coz you won’t need anyone to make you happy as you are happy already…and in that way when you get your woman you will make her extra happy because you are content, confident, and happy already.
1.5 Too Superspiritual
Now I love God and He loves me. We are tight and most of the time I disappoint Him but He always finds it in His heart to forgive me. I would say that our relationship is more or less balanced…not perfect coz whose relationship with God is ever perfect…but it’s ok. But I don’t have to talk about what He has done for me all the time. And I don’t have to listen to gospel music, wear the WWJD band around my wrist, the “Jesus died for me on the Cross” t-shirt, use the Christian slang with everyone, etc. all the time to prove that I am a Christian to me or everyone.
Now many people can prove me wrong but in my opinion and experience I would say that it’s a “heart thing” and you project what is in your heart without saying a word. People can mostly tell what type of person you are just by looking at you. There’s just something different about you and people know it. It’s the light of Jesus shining from within your heart, the Holy Spirit in you, and God’s mighty hand upon you. Paul even said that he is no “Super-apostles” (2Corinthians 12vs11) meaning that no-one is different and that we all just part of a Great Commission that Jesus gave us (Matthew 28vs16-20). So you don’t have to go way out to prove that you are a Christian.
Girls often complain that Christian guys aren’t real enough. In fact they say that they are false. They hide behind their scriptural jargon and never show their true self. I was one of them too. I thought that if I am involved in five ministries, pray well in front of others, be a good youth leader, be able to quote as many scriptures as I can, etc. then girls would fall for me left, right and centre. To an extent it is appealing to some Christian women but the real and balanced ones wants real and balanced Christian guys…not saying that you shouldn’t pray in public or be involved in church work. Now it’s good to study the Word of God and its good to feed your soul but the bible says in Ecclesiastes 3vs 1-8 that there’s a time for everything. Use the scriptures wisely, use what is taught to you in this book and everyday wisely.
Let me give you an analogy of KNOWLEGDE and WISDOM in the form of a light bulb and electrical switch in your bedroom: Knowledge is knowing how the light bulb and switch work…you turn on the electrical switch and it allows electricity to move at a super high speed to the bulb making the element burn thus giving off light to your bedroom. Wisdom is KNOWING when to activate that electrical switch…its of no use activating that switch during the day when the sun is shining into your room, you don’t need it and you are wasting energy, the wise thing to do is to switch on the bulb in the evening when its dark or whenever it rains and the sun is hidden, etc. My point is: use your knowledge wisely and when it is applicable.
One of the examples I can give you where we can show that Christian guys are superspiritual is when a lady asks a guy; “Hello Byron, how are you today?” Byron’s answer would be; “Patricia, The Lord is still on the throne.” The girl didn’t ask Byron if the Lord was still on the throne, she asked how he was…as a matter of fact; I think we all would be in trouble if the Lord wasn’t on the throne. Rather answer her with this; “I’m fine Patricia and how are you today?” Another example is; “So how have your day been Byron?” Bryon’s answer; “The devil persecuted me by working through my manager but the Lord will bring me victory and revival is on its way.” Mmmmmm…okay, rather answer her in this way; “My day have been hectic but I’m all the more better seeing you now Patricia.” Do you get my point? Be real, you don’t have to show your true feelings but keep your answers and conversations to the point and relevant to the topic.
2. Bad Boyz traits
2.8 Makes them feel like they are wanted and special…like they can identify with them. Manipulative/Deceptive.
With being charming, flirtatious, and persuasive Bad Boyz often use manipulative actions and deceptive methods to stalk their prey. They have an ability to see which women is “easy meat”, which are lonely, restricted by their parents, which girls are bored with the norm, parent (daddy) problems, are bored in their marriage, sexually deprived, etc. They mostly prey on these women; make them feel like they are special, that they can identify with them as they are also social outcasts. With this they can easily draw women away, divide and conquer is their motto. Take the women slowly and slowly away from the norm and show them a world that seems more exciting. They deceive women by convincing them that they would have an exciting and fulfilling life with them, often painting a picture of a never ending blissful paradise life, making unrealistic promises that seem so real to women.
How can this help you? First rule is that you shouldn’t be deceptive. Be honest with her no matter what. Don’t ever make promises you can’t keep. What you can learn from this is to make your life exciting as possible so that when she steps into your world she will be excited to stay there, I’m not saying you should spend thousands on her to keep her happy but just make your world as interesting as possible. Remember to be a breath of fresh air to her, but also mysterious…someone who is not bound by the norm. And yes, make her feel wanted…tell her that you want to be with her. Make her feel like she is the princess of your world but mind that you do not overdo the sweet toothache thing discussed in 1.6 Too Sweet. We’ll talk more about that later.
2.9 Renegade; Short tempered; Carries dangerous weapons; Rebellious; Unfaithful; Despises Authority; Bad reputation; Disrespectful; No remorse; Bad credit rating; Intimidating; Parents despises them
These are all traits that make up the core of the Bad Boyz. Some of it does attract women and for the main reason that they see it as a project to change the characters of the Bad Boyz but it seldom happens. Delving into these traits to use them to win women over will only draw you into a world that will moist probably destroy you. I have found that being a Good Guy and using the knowledge in this book have given me a well over-advantage against the Bad Boyz and that is all you will need. And if you struggle with any of those traits mentioned above I would suggest that you seek help to conquer them.
