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To each person I think there is a different way. <--I know thats probably not the answer you were looking for.
For me there are things that are said in earnest that symbolize the amount of loyalty, love and dedication present in the Relationship. Little things and big things are signs as to the attitude and direction a relationship is going right from the very beginning. For instance:
Mild short term relationship compliments sound like this:
I think you are a good listener.
I like your shoes.
Nice tan/great skin.
You are really smart.
You have pretty hair.
^Love isn't really there but the people are new enough that exploring the qualities of the other person is still fun.
Medium to long term relationship with no real marriage potential compliments sound like this:
You are the best at making my day.
The things you do make me smile.
You have a good taste in music.
We make a fine pair.
You are a good cook.
^Love is potentially there but there is no genuine depth or urge to go deeper into what makes up these people.
For the win, these are the compliments that set someone apart and seal them to whatever end finds the relationship.
I believe in you
I'm with you/ I will follow you/ I will take you with me.
I love the way you see the world.
You always make me smile.
I trust you/ I feel safe with you
I see you/ I know you/ I understand you.
I wish you could see yourself through my eyes.
So really what separates my three made up categories is that the first one is full of indifferent compliments. These statements are probably true but have very little to do with anything. The Second category is the selfish and progressively less shallow relationship compliments. These are designed to make the other person feel appreciated. They are probably true and add to the collective nature of the relationship without actually enabling it to grow. The third set of compliments is directed at reinforcing the person's identity. Its purpose is a genuine acknowledgement of the amount of intangible qualities that are present in the other person, as well as potentially in the relationship.
The Nature of Love is such that even though a woman might be utterly beautiful, a man's true love for her will always seek to identify with who she is in the very depths of her character.
For me there are things that are said in earnest that symbolize the amount of loyalty, love and dedication present in the Relationship. Little things and big things are signs as to the attitude and direction a relationship is going right from the very beginning. For instance:
Mild short term relationship compliments sound like this:
I think you are a good listener.
I like your shoes.
Nice tan/great skin.
You are really smart.
You have pretty hair.
^Love isn't really there but the people are new enough that exploring the qualities of the other person is still fun.
Medium to long term relationship with no real marriage potential compliments sound like this:
You are the best at making my day.
The things you do make me smile.
You have a good taste in music.
We make a fine pair.
You are a good cook.
^Love is potentially there but there is no genuine depth or urge to go deeper into what makes up these people.
For the win, these are the compliments that set someone apart and seal them to whatever end finds the relationship.
I believe in you
I'm with you/ I will follow you/ I will take you with me.
I love the way you see the world.
You always make me smile.
I trust you/ I feel safe with you
I see you/ I know you/ I understand you.
I wish you could see yourself through my eyes.
So really what separates my three made up categories is that the first one is full of indifferent compliments. These statements are probably true but have very little to do with anything. The Second category is the selfish and progressively less shallow relationship compliments. These are designed to make the other person feel appreciated. They are probably true and add to the collective nature of the relationship without actually enabling it to grow. The third set of compliments is directed at reinforcing the person's identity. Its purpose is a genuine acknowledgement of the amount of intangible qualities that are present in the other person, as well as potentially in the relationship.
The Nature of Love is such that even though a woman might be utterly beautiful, a man's true love for her will always seek to identify with who she is in the very depths of her character.
J
When everything about him fascinates you and you want to learn more, even the silly things and bad habits. When even the sound of his voice over the phone makes your heart jump. When you know you would follow him anywhere. When he walks up behind you, takes your hand, and everyone else in the room disappears. When you don't care what anyone else has to say about him. When what he has to say about a thing is more interesting than anything anyone else has to say. When the strength and independence the rest of the world sees in you melts into vulnerability and passion in his arms.
N
It's a package deal..
In my opinion it's about:
1. Evaluating the Fruits of the Relationship... (does it please the Lord?)
2. Honesty (If there is ANY untruth or deception... RUN ... RUN FAST!)
3. Is your faith growing?... Is your walk with Christ progressing?...Is your joint faith integrated into your daily lifes?...
4. Are your values the same?
5. Are you friends? (Don't fall in love with someone you can't be friends with...)
6. Can you resolve conflicts? Is the communication there? (Does one person always give in? or do you both work on "making up"?
7. Is there any disrespect? Disregard for your feelings? If so... walk away!
8. Does this person have other healthy relationships?
9. Get honest feedback from someone you know will tell you the truth about the relationship.
Of course the list goes on... after romantic love there are "foundation" stones... that is what these things are...
In my opinion it's about:
1. Evaluating the Fruits of the Relationship... (does it please the Lord?)
2. Honesty (If there is ANY untruth or deception... RUN ... RUN FAST!)
3. Is your faith growing?... Is your walk with Christ progressing?...Is your joint faith integrated into your daily lifes?...
4. Are your values the same?
5. Are you friends? (Don't fall in love with someone you can't be friends with...)
6. Can you resolve conflicts? Is the communication there? (Does one person always give in? or do you both work on "making up"?
7. Is there any disrespect? Disregard for your feelings? If so... walk away!
8. Does this person have other healthy relationships?
9. Get honest feedback from someone you know will tell you the truth about the relationship.
Of course the list goes on... after romantic love there are "foundation" stones... that is what these things are...
Hi there
It is one of the hardest questions with the easiest answers.
You see when we ask this question, we ask it mostly kind of to see whether or not the other person measures up. And will he/she be the right one. How do I know I won't make a mistake with them.
So to get the question's answer right, you must turn the question. Place yourself under a microscope. And no, I didn't mean take a glance at yourself. I said microscope. Literally. You see, even while you are still in confusion, your spirit and body knows. But there is more to it than that. You need to ask yourself, if this is what I want in that person am I good enough for the one in ALL the areas of my life. Check every detail. Now when you meet the person...you are going to think that that person might not accept this or that part of you. Your wrong. When you are a match. You fit literally like a glove. So you'll be a match (not the same) a match on every area, yes EVERY area of your life. However, here is the catch. Sin is not part of your being. So anything you commit in sin, will not abide with that person. Anything that the sin cause you to do will not abide with that person. And any consequence that was the result of your sin, will not abide with that person. And then the question is, how much can that person forgive you and your actions. And how much can you forgive yourself. And how much can you forgive any of their sins. That is where you will start. To be completely open and forgiving towards the other person without holding a mustard seed back. You must be willing to put your whole life on their hands and they must be willing to do the same. And the more sin their is between you, the harder it would be for you to break through. Whether it be to lie, be jealous, be adulterious, be alcoholic. No matter what sin. You should free yourself from it. And plead for forgiveness. From God, but also from any sin committed that affects your partner. And only if both of you can totally forgive each other and yourselves, will you have a totally open and unique relationship.
You will go out of your way to do things for that person. This will happen naturally. From both sides. It might not be what you or he/she expects. But you will want to make every effort to be with that person. Yet feel completely free at the same time with that person.
A tip, I can give anyone. For starters. Try to stop thinking of what that person must be for you, and think and become what you must be for that person. How clean, holy, pure. For the rest which you wonder about, will come automatically. For it is God that will place you together. And yes, it is also God that will take you away from each other. And trust me. Whether or not your fat, has a lot less leverage than whether or not you are clean and holy. God will give you that person in the right time. But here is the ultimate question. Will you be the person that that person would want to marry? Don't ask him/her. Ask yourself. For you must become that. Become that responsible person. Become that adult which that person can look up to.
And they will automatically try their best to look over your sin, if it is true love. But unfortunately, it makes it a LOT harder. And if they can't you have only yourself to blaim. And if they can, you might not have the privelidge of having that person for as long as you hoped.
To put it to you straight. If you had only 5 months to be married to that person. And you knew it before hand. Would you be willing to change your entire life style, personality, income (would you be willing to live of the bare necessities and give the rest to that person)? Would you be willing to give up everything for that person. Only to find out he/she would die. Knowing that you would cry yourself to sleep for months afterward longing for your companion. Longing to feel them breathing. Longing to feel their arms around you. Feeling as if your whole purpose in life is destroyed. Feeling that you have been wronged, but knowing that you were given someone special for a very short while.
Because if you are not willing. Turn around. Make sure. And if not. Get out.
But if you are sure, you are willing to go through all that. If you feel you are willing to go through better or worse. Sickness and health...
Then listen
God takes you up on your promises. IF you said through better and worse. You are going to GET worse. If you said sickness and health. you'll GET it.
Not maybe. You'll get it. You WILL be put to the test of what is going to HURT you the most. And you are both going to feel it.
It is not a maybe. It is a defininate. You are going to understand your LIMITS very well. But in that remember that God will not forsake you. God will not test you above that which you can handle.
Now if you at this moment can think of all the worst possible things that can happen, and you are still willing to marry that person and to do that with that person in ALL that circumstances. Then and ONLY then. And they want to go with you. And God gives you His blessing. Then and ONLY then. Go for it. You will not be making a mistake. You will have a beautiful marriage. You will have hardship. You will have beautiful times. You will feel that that person is the blessing you have always waited for. You will feel complete. And together in some weird way. You'll have total peace.
1 Corithians 13 from BOTH sides.
You think the waiting is the HARDEST. And hopefully, it is. For if you didn't wait. The pain of loosing that person and the guild that comes with it. That is the HARDEST PRISON you'll ever face. One from which you cannot run away from. Nor can you escape it.
God can set you free. But it is not going to be quick and easy. So save yourself and pray for your future partner that they save themself for you. And hope you will meet each other pure.
The rest WILL NOT MATTER. That person will seem like an angel of beauty to you, regardless of what others think.
I pray you listen. DO NOT BE HASTY. PRAY. WHATEVER YOU DO. PRAY!
It is one of the hardest questions with the easiest answers.
You see when we ask this question, we ask it mostly kind of to see whether or not the other person measures up. And will he/she be the right one. How do I know I won't make a mistake with them.
So to get the question's answer right, you must turn the question. Place yourself under a microscope. And no, I didn't mean take a glance at yourself. I said microscope. Literally. You see, even while you are still in confusion, your spirit and body knows. But there is more to it than that. You need to ask yourself, if this is what I want in that person am I good enough for the one in ALL the areas of my life. Check every detail. Now when you meet the person...you are going to think that that person might not accept this or that part of you. Your wrong. When you are a match. You fit literally like a glove. So you'll be a match (not the same) a match on every area, yes EVERY area of your life. However, here is the catch. Sin is not part of your being. So anything you commit in sin, will not abide with that person. Anything that the sin cause you to do will not abide with that person. And any consequence that was the result of your sin, will not abide with that person. And then the question is, how much can that person forgive you and your actions. And how much can you forgive yourself. And how much can you forgive any of their sins. That is where you will start. To be completely open and forgiving towards the other person without holding a mustard seed back. You must be willing to put your whole life on their hands and they must be willing to do the same. And the more sin their is between you, the harder it would be for you to break through. Whether it be to lie, be jealous, be adulterious, be alcoholic. No matter what sin. You should free yourself from it. And plead for forgiveness. From God, but also from any sin committed that affects your partner. And only if both of you can totally forgive each other and yourselves, will you have a totally open and unique relationship.
You will go out of your way to do things for that person. This will happen naturally. From both sides. It might not be what you or he/she expects. But you will want to make every effort to be with that person. Yet feel completely free at the same time with that person.
A tip, I can give anyone. For starters. Try to stop thinking of what that person must be for you, and think and become what you must be for that person. How clean, holy, pure. For the rest which you wonder about, will come automatically. For it is God that will place you together. And yes, it is also God that will take you away from each other. And trust me. Whether or not your fat, has a lot less leverage than whether or not you are clean and holy. God will give you that person in the right time. But here is the ultimate question. Will you be the person that that person would want to marry? Don't ask him/her. Ask yourself. For you must become that. Become that responsible person. Become that adult which that person can look up to.
And they will automatically try their best to look over your sin, if it is true love. But unfortunately, it makes it a LOT harder. And if they can't you have only yourself to blaim. And if they can, you might not have the privelidge of having that person for as long as you hoped.
To put it to you straight. If you had only 5 months to be married to that person. And you knew it before hand. Would you be willing to change your entire life style, personality, income (would you be willing to live of the bare necessities and give the rest to that person)? Would you be willing to give up everything for that person. Only to find out he/she would die. Knowing that you would cry yourself to sleep for months afterward longing for your companion. Longing to feel them breathing. Longing to feel their arms around you. Feeling as if your whole purpose in life is destroyed. Feeling that you have been wronged, but knowing that you were given someone special for a very short while.
Because if you are not willing. Turn around. Make sure. And if not. Get out.
But if you are sure, you are willing to go through all that. If you feel you are willing to go through better or worse. Sickness and health...
Then listen
God takes you up on your promises. IF you said through better and worse. You are going to GET worse. If you said sickness and health. you'll GET it.
Not maybe. You'll get it. You WILL be put to the test of what is going to HURT you the most. And you are both going to feel it.
It is not a maybe. It is a defininate. You are going to understand your LIMITS very well. But in that remember that God will not forsake you. God will not test you above that which you can handle.
Now if you at this moment can think of all the worst possible things that can happen, and you are still willing to marry that person and to do that with that person in ALL that circumstances. Then and ONLY then. And they want to go with you. And God gives you His blessing. Then and ONLY then. Go for it. You will not be making a mistake. You will have a beautiful marriage. You will have hardship. You will have beautiful times. You will feel that that person is the blessing you have always waited for. You will feel complete. And together in some weird way. You'll have total peace.
1 Corithians 13 from BOTH sides.
You think the waiting is the HARDEST. And hopefully, it is. For if you didn't wait. The pain of loosing that person and the guild that comes with it. That is the HARDEST PRISON you'll ever face. One from which you cannot run away from. Nor can you escape it.
God can set you free. But it is not going to be quick and easy. So save yourself and pray for your future partner that they save themself for you. And hope you will meet each other pure.
The rest WILL NOT MATTER. That person will seem like an angel of beauty to you, regardless of what others think.
I pray you listen. DO NOT BE HASTY. PRAY. WHATEVER YOU DO. PRAY!