I am NOT happy!

[Lanolin]

A lot of small businesses are run by 'cowboys' I found out...if you a tradie in nz, it seems its the done thing to rip off as many ppl as possible.
If you a medium sized business, if you get too successful, you'll just get bought out by the richer australians. Its inevitable. Making ends meet is a full time job here, that is why the 'smart' people get into property flippin real estate. You dont even have to get out of bed to make money doing that.

 

[Underwhosewings]

do you have your own business
None of my parents wanted to go into business as having your own business consumes your life and they didnt want the responsibility...mum raised us all to go to university, get degrees and hopefully find someone willing to employ us. Of course that didnt work lol. She didnt reckon with the nz economy.

The only other option, not open to women these days is to marry a rich husband. Not likely in nz. Most people go overseas to work

At 13 years of age I saw people who had money and how unhappy they were.
So I never pursued after money.
Money was never my focus.
Only to be occupied and productive.
By 17 years, God turned my life upside down. He began His work to finally bring me to repentance & salvation.
My parents grew up in the days when some had to travel/shift house to get work. Having to attend a different school each year. (mum and dad were very productive type of people, very clever in what they could do. Self taught. From Christian backgrounds.)
So when they married and had us children we had a very stable upbringing. As the employment situation was stable.
Great grandpa had a general store somewhere in NZ, and had to give so much credit to customers because it was during the war, and not much money around.
But his son (my grandpa) volunteered for the war, after some years he came home and paid off his dads debts.
My dad also thought to have a business but didn’t want the responsibility.
He had his eyes set on retiring in QLD where he was born.
So no, I don’t have a business, but I am very happily volunteering in the House of God.

 

[Lanolin]

I wasnt raised in church, but when i was saved in my 30s God had me quit my job and got me volunteering. Mum wasnt happy that I ditched my job!

Well now she cant do anything about it, Ive also been made redundant and fired for being a christian in the workplace but thats ok, Im happy doing Bibles in schools again.

There is never enough money for librarians in nz, we dont work for the pay thats for sure.

 

[Lanolin]

I know a lot of people who think retiring in QLD would be for them, but just as many return to NZ saying its too hot over there.

Am not sure why they do this. What does QLD have for retired people? After youve been to the gold coast theme parks, what else is there to do.

Note, people under 65 dont receive any money/pension so you cant say you are retired if you are under that age, you are just deemed unemployed. lol

 

[Lanolin]

am wondering if I should tell my retired principal that I am now 'retired' but she is probably off somewhere on a cruise or in Fiji and not worrying her pretty head about anything to do with school.

What do you do when youve been suspended from school anyway? Im like I would like to go, sit exams and study and do book reviews I will get withdrawal if I dont get the gold stars and play lunch.

I have found myself thinking is this actually a punishment or a relief? I actually prefer doing homework to school work mostly but the boss at home doesnt pay me, is extremely critical and is possibly worse.

 

[Underwhosewings]

am wondering if I should tell my retired principal that I am now 'retired' but she is probably off somewhere on a cruise or in Fiji and not worrying her pretty head about anything to do with school.

What do you do when youve been suspended from school anyway? Im like I would like to go, sit exams and study and do book reviews I will get withdrawal if I dont get the gold stars and play lunch.

I have found myself thinking is this actually a punishment or a relief? I actually prefer doing homework to school work mostly but the boss at home doesnt pay me, is extremely critical and is possibly worse.

It’s relief, God wants to take us on with Him. commune with your LORD. Ask Him to direct your steps and to take all resentment out of your heart.
You have to let it go.
Proverbs 15:13 KJV
A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance: but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken.

 

[Lanolin]

mum doesnt like God. Shes jealous of Him.

 

[Lanolin]

mm Im a bit down at the moment. I got up one sunday and thought I could go to church but I didnt have any decent clothes to wear. Then. I have to face all these people and theres no chair for me.

And I would be sitting in the pew or chair in the back row by myself and watching everyone else.

and theres always one lady at church who asks me why Im not married and says to my face she feels sorry for me or the others talk about me as if they want to matchmake me or the other church where the men hit on me. And its all very awkward sometimes because I dont hit on them back.

I once visited my friends church and she wanted me to share in front of everyone all my personal stuff and Im like who wants to know? They have this sharing time thing but its all very self congratulatory in reality.
At the big church theres always crowds of people with their families but my family dont come with me, and its never really been a safe place. I always feel like they dont really want me there unless Ive invested a huge amount of money in church or had a wedding there or something or been there for years and years. I remember one church I joined there was one girl who fleeced me pretty much cos I was single.

Im not sure why I feel this way about church in general really. Im not good at meetings and tend to fall asleep when someone goes on for too long, and there are always too many people to small talk with. Maybe its just the sunday service thing or im just not in that space right now. Like I literally cant get up and walk anywhere without doors slamming in my face.

If Im given the keys to the kingdom, why is it when I get there everything is closed? Is there something Im not getting about church that everyone else is getting? Im very wary now.

Each time I take communion I want to take a huge chunk of bread and a full glass of grape juice, but at church you only meant to take a thimbleful and tiny morsel of bread and then it all gets taken back to the kitchen. Is it wrong to ask for more when youve been given only crumbs?

 

[Underwhosewings]

mm Im a bit down at the moment. I got up one sunday and thought I could go to church but I didnt have any decent clothes to wear. Then. I have to face all these people and theres no chair for me.

And I would be sitting in the pew or chair in the back row by myself and watching everyone else.

and theres always one lady at church who asks me why Im not married and says to my face she feels sorry for me or the others talk about me as if they want to matchmake me or the other church where the men hit on me. And its all very awkward sometimes because I dont hit on them back.

I once visited my friends church and she wanted me to share in front of everyone all my personal stuff and Im like who wants to know? They have this sharing time thing but its all very self congratulatory in reality.
At the big church theres always crowds of people with their families but my family dont come with me, and its never really been a safe place. I always feel like they dont really want me there unless Ive invested a huge amount of money in church or had a wedding there or something or been there for years and years. I remember one church I joined there was one girl who fleeced me pretty much cos I was single.

Im not sure why I feel this way about church in general really. Im not good at meetings and tend to fall asleep when someone goes on for too long, and there are always too many people to small talk with. Maybe its just the sunday service thing or im just not in that space right now. Like I literally cant get up and walk anywhere without doors slamming in my face.

If Im given the keys to the kingdom, why is it when I get there everything is closed? Is there something Im not getting about church that everyone else is getting? Im very wary now.

Each time I take communion I want to take a huge chunk of bread and a full glass of grape juice, but at church you only meant to take a thimbleful and tiny morsel of bread and then it all gets taken back to the kitchen. Is it wrong to ask for more when youve been given only crumbs?

That is sadly very true in many “churches” and that’s why I got such a shock when I was brought to this church.
The Christians here are real.
And the Bible (KJV) is taught.
And the gates of hell have come against it, but could not prevail, very much the opposite, it is increasing to other locations of Australia.
The seven churches (they were the house of God, not denominational)
in the book of Revelation, most were given a message of repentance from the Lord.
But there were some saints there that were “keeping their garments unspotted by the world”

If you at least join us on Skype to listen in, (no video) you will get some direction from the Lord through His word.

 

[Lanolin]

That is sadly very true in many “churches” and that’s why I got such a shock when I was brought to this church.
The Christians here are real.
And the Bible (KJV) is taught.
And the gates of hell have come against it, but could not prevail, very much the opposite, it is increasing to other locations of Australia.
The seven churches (they were the house of God, not denominational)
in the book of Revelation, most were given a message of repentance from the Lord.
But there were some saints there that were “keeping their garments unspotted by the world”

If you at least join us on Skype to listen in, (no video) you will get some direction from the Lord through His word.

huh what church is that. Im ok with listening in for a while. But Im not in Aussie.
I was in a KJV only church once but that was actually where one guy was hitting on me. I do read KJV though its my go to Bible ...I dont go for the teaching tho more for fellowship and worship, I learn more by reading more than listening though as its actually faster for me to read.

The Bible college is offering some local courses free in the evenings one is on missions and the other on the new testament and you can earn credits and theres an exam but I am not sure about enrolling, one is on Tuesdays when I have garden club commitment and the other on wednesdays when I have teachers quiz. If you did pay it would have cost $787 for a paper.

I guess I have to pray about it and give up something or make time to go, depending on where they hold it. Ive done a missions course before but didnt end up going on any missions because nz is so far away from places that its just too expensive to go on them. Everyone comes here anyway.

 

[Underwhosewings]

huh what church is that. Im ok with listening in for a while. But Im not in Aussie.
I was in a KJV only church once but that was actually where one guy was hitting on me. I do read KJV though its my go to Bible ...I dont go for the teaching tho more for fellowship and worship, I learn more by reading more than listening though as its actually faster for me to read.

The Bible college is offering some local courses free in the evenings one is on missions and the other on the new testament and you can earn credits and theres an exam but I am not sure about enrolling, one is on Tuesdays when I have garden club commitment and the other on wednesdays when I have teachers quiz. If you did pay it would have cost $787 for a paper.

I guess I have to pray about it and give up something or make time to go, depending on where they hold it. Ive done a missions course before but didnt end up going on any missions because nz is so far away from places that its just too expensive to go on them. Everyone comes here anyway.

The Church is in Sydney.
We will have a meeting in the morning (Tuesday) at 11am which would be 1pm your time. But you might be busy at the garden.
If not you can join on Skype if you are familiar with that.
We have a few songs, then a lady has been going through the book of acts.

https://join.skype.com/0l1PQQofe4Ol

That will take you straight to the group of listeners on Skype.

 

[Lanolin]

hmm may give it a go though I dont have skype atm

If I get home in time as plan to go for walk tomorrow, then apply for job, have to redo CV, cover letter and copy all my documents again. Yesterday was ringing round for referees. The hardest thing was finding someone who worked with me who was willing to put in a good word cos obviously the mircromanaging principal would not make a good referee.

Everyone is spoke with is quite horrified about the way staff are treated at that school. Very toxic culture and you dont want to be in all those office politics. Though my 'office' was more like a cupboard under the stairs with a waterfall in it. Im like I cant really work here plus the books will get all wet and that was seen as unreasonable lol

 

[Underwhosewings]

hmm may give it a go though I dont have skype atm

If I get home in time as plan to go for walk tomorrow, then apply for job, have to redo CV, cover letter and copy all my documents again. Yesterday was ringing round for referees. The hardest thing was finding someone who worked with me who was willing to put in a good word cos obviously the mircromanaging principal would not make a good referee.

Everyone is spoke with is quite horrified about the way staff are treated at that school. Very toxic culture and you dont want to be in all those office politics. Though my 'office' was more like a cupboard under the stairs with a waterfall in it. Im like I cant really work here plus the books will get all wet and that was seen as unreasonable lol

You don’t actually need skype.
the link takes you straight to the group.
Just mute your camera when you see it at the bottom of your screen.
I can help if you forget to mute your microphone.
If you like it, you can join every week, and other meetings that might be a better time of day for you. I will see you joining and help if necessary.

 

[Underwhosewings]

I have called the group now.
You may connect when you’re ready

 

[Underwhosewings]

hmm may give it a go though I dont have skype atm

If I get home in time as plan to go for walk tomorrow, then apply for job, have to redo CV, cover letter and copy all my documents again. Yesterday was ringing round for referees. The hardest thing was finding someone who worked with me who was willing to put in a good word cos obviously the mircromanaging principal would not make a good referee.

Everyone is spoke with is quite horrified about the way staff are treated at that school. Very toxic culture and you dont want to be in all those office politics. Though my 'office' was more like a cupboard under the stairs with a waterfall in it. Im like I cant really work here plus the books will get all wet and that was seen as unreasonable lol

A Tongan lady is doing the song service. 😊

 

[Lanolin]

aw sorry I didnt get back home in time was out today
hopefully next week?

 

[Lanolin]

Im sorry I go out with a walk on tuesdays with a group of quakers so dont get back home till after one.

The only thing about quakers is they seem to have lots of gay couples but then a lot of churches have them too. I try not to judge them possibly theyve been abused or molested and thats why they turned gay.

Its either heres your extreme - married straight couples who have problems with out of control children or divorces that have problems with exes or gay codependants who latch on to others even if not gay (then marry) or the single person who is desperate and on the prowl.

its never ok heres a bunch of people that can be good friends with no dramas and hang out. I dont really focus on other peoples messy relationships though the thing is to focus on God while out walking and enjoy exploring and it is safer to do so in a group rather than walk by yourself. But obviously all kinds of individuals make up a group.

it was world refugee day and they were raising money for christian world refugees. I still need to donate. I believe God is our refuge and whenver you turn to Him you'll be safe no matter what is going on in the world or with other people after all Jesus saves

 

[Lanolin]

Remind myself need to donate as I'd pledged

Kept thinking what a psychopath my former boss was and worried for the children left at that school and all the teachers that have to deal with her bullying behaviour

I just have to put all that behind me tho. As they say shake the dust off your feet and move on. Also its a sin to worry Im sure that when ppl see the light they'll head toward it rather than stay in darkness.

 

[resto]

Im not Happy. I stopped trying to make myself Happy. I learned to be content even when Im sad. I feel better now. Im not Happy or Sad anymore. Just content. Maybe Im too jaded or Old
to care. LOL

 

[Lanolin]

The whole 'not happy' thing went against the school motto which was why it was so shocking when the then principal announced it to me. lol

The others schools motto was Aspire, Succeed and Respect. But that principal of that one was the one who quashed a lot of childrens dreams by not letting them do anything. Also, it seemed the children didnt know what aspire meant and kept saying it was 'expire'.

the next schools motto is 'to wisdom with honor' so will be kind of interesting how that plays out. I think a lot of education is dumbed down these days and nobodys really learning much.

Teachers and aides say many children dont have social skills anymore. I think parents can be quite clueless on raising families now. But its not the done thing to admit that you have noooo idea what to do when you have children. Grandparents are often absent or not prepared to be an important part of their grandchildrens lives. Maybe they are too old to care.

I know one girl went overseas to go to her grandmas funeral as the grandma had decided to kill herself by euthanasia as they do in holland - she wanted everyone to be there for that event. The grandaughter hadnt met her grandmother prior to that and had only a week with her before she decided to die. ?!