Is it weird being single after 20 ?

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Descyple

Senior Member
Jun 7, 2010
3,023
48
48
#21
If it's weird to be single after 20, it must be freakishly sociopathic to be single after 40 (I turn 40 next year, so it doesn't apply to me yet!!!).
 
A

arwen83

Guest
#22
No it is not weird to be single after 20, quite the norm these days
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#23
YES ITS WEIRD!
 
Sep 6, 2013
4,430
117
63
#24
You guys are all weirdos. But I'm not sure age has anything to do with it.

:)
 
L

Lecrae

Guest
#25
I am 23 and single.I have never dated any one.Is it kinda weird not having any girlfriend when you get 20's?
I don't know how to put this exactly,According to the bible If a man want to stay single for his entire life he can, as long as he doesn't disobey the law.Well I am perfectly happy being single(I don't like going for a random girl like my friends.I can wait and I want to do it in god's way rather than my way, I don't wanna rush,getting the right person is the most important thing in life) But the problem is, I really don't like the way that other people think about me or people like me.They think like I am incapable of getting a girl even though I am 23 and I wanna know Is this just me who feel like this? or Is there anyone with me?).

I'm being honest, and I'm probably going to step on some toes. But hear me out - I say this out of love, I don't mean to harm you. This is just a man to man conversation.

Your motivation for wanting to get married is wrong. Don't be worried if people think of you as strange if you're single. And don't be down on yourself if you're single. If you want a girlfriend, you have to realize that dating is for marriage in mind. If you don't want to be married, don't date.

Now with that being said, you have to realize that love, dating, and marriage isn't all the media portrays it to be. As men, we have a HUGE responsibility when it comes to marriage, and if you don't fulfill these responsibilities, the Bible calls us "worse than unbelievers" or it says that "our prayers will be hindered." And let me tell you, relationships are NOT easy. It's not all about mushy-gushy feelings for someone and living happily ever after. Eventually, you WILL lose those feelings for your spouse. It happens to everyone (although, the feelings can come back eventually. This is called the 'honeymoon' stage in a relationship if you want to research it). You have to realize that true love happens after those good feelings have passed, because love is not just a feeling, it's an action. Once you realize and experience this, then you are ready for marriage. Sometimes you have to choose to love the other person, even when it hurts.

Don't be deceived brother. Marriage is a great thing. Just be aware that it's not easy and sometimes brings more troubles in your life than if you were single. But if Christ is at the center of the marriage/relationship the whole time, it will all be worth it.
 
Oct 14, 2013
4,750
21
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#27
Adam was sigle at somepoint hmmm I wonder what age he was when God created him hmmm definitely he was not a teenager

just a thought :)
 
F

FireWire

Guest
#28
Lecare: exactly what C.S Lewis said.
 
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Lecrae

Guest
#29
Lecare: exactly what C.S Lewis said.
Which book? The only book of his I read was Mere Christianity, I'd love to add another of his to my list!
 
F

FireWire

Guest
#30
Mere Christianity :)
What we call “being in love” is a glorious state, and, in several ways, good for us. It helps to make us generous and courageous, it opens our eyes not only to the beauty of the beloved but to all beauty, and it subordinates (especially at first) our merely animal sexuality; in that sense, love is the great conqueror of lust. No one in his senses would deny that being in love is far better than either common sensuality or cold self-centredness. But, as I said before, “the most dangerous thing you can do is to take any one impulse of our own nature and set it up as the thing you ought to follow at all costs.” Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last; but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called “being in love” usually does not last. If the old fairytale ending “They lived happily ever after” is taken to mean “They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married,” then it says what probably never was nor ever could be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be “in love” need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense-love as distinct from “being in love” is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both parents ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be “in love” with someone else. “Being in love” first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.”
 
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Elizabeth_82

Guest
#31
It is not weird at all. I think the contrary. I believe it is un-wise to date when you are not ready for commitment. Just as my dear friend said (lotusflower) why go through heart aches? Save yourself from the pain and deception. Waiting on Christ for your soul mate is the smartest and best way to go. I hate seeing desperate teenagers being single mothers or couples that cant get along having children. It is best to wait for the best. Many think God is not interested in love, when He is the Author of Love. God doesnt just care for the ride, He cares much more for our destination. I waited on my husband, and now I am completely blessed. :)
 
C

Crazylove

Guest
#32
As a Christian we hav to b bold even with our own brothers and sisters! Everyone's timing isn't th same, also not everyone's meant 2 marry (this is only those who don't want 2 b of course or if God has called u 2 a ministry that could endanger others). There's this awesome book for women called "The Single Woman" by Mandy Hale... I recommend it for all my sisters in Christ, I'm srry but don't know of any to encourage u brother, just hold on to God. As long as ur eyes r on him, everything else will fall in place. ur normal is all urs, and if ur heart is w/ God, ur where he wants u 2 b! And apart of that is not always looking normal to th outside, by God ur right where he wants ur normal 2 b ;)
 
A

Art05

Guest
#33
Mere Christianity :)
What we call “being in love” is a glorious state, and, in several ways, good for us. It helps to make us generous and courageous, it opens our eyes not only to the beauty of the beloved but to all beauty, and it subordinates (especially at first) our merely animal sexuality; in that sense, love is the great conqueror of lust. No one in his senses would deny that being in love is far better than either common sensuality or cold self-centredness. But, as I said before, “the most dangerous thing you can do is to take any one impulse of our own nature and set it up as the thing you ought to follow at all costs.” Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last; but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called “being in love” usually does not last. If the old fairytale ending “They lived happily ever after” is taken to mean “They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married,” then it says what probably never was nor ever could be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be “in love” need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense-love as distinct from “being in love” is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both parents ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be “in love” with someone else. “Being in love” first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.”
Love C. S. Lewis!