My non-Christian boyfirend - help??

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
C

cc11

Guest
#1
#1
HI, I decided today that I want to have better relationship with Jesus - I've always had a relationship wth Jesus but now I've just really decided to devote my life

I don't want to do the wrong thing by having a non Christian boyfriend and I fear it's not right because of what it says in the bible about not be unevenly yoked to others.

But i cant stand the thought of breaking up with him. I love my boyfriend so much and can't imagine my life without him. He would do anything for me.

I can't talk to anyone in my family, but should i try talk to someone before I decided to break up.

or should I wait a while to see if he follows in my witness and sees the love of God in me. then becomes saved?

I really need some advice please....
 
A

Adrianv125

Senior Member
#2
Jan 17, 2011
567
12
18
#2
CC11, the biblical and Spirit Driven thing to do is to in LOVE explain to your boyfriend exactly the reason of why Jesus said we shouldn't be unequally yoked. Tell him to understand that you are called to live a life that is Holy. It is a command of God to not even get to the point of dating worldly people, much less call someone of the world our boyfriend or girlfriend. This is not something i say, it's what the word says. Unfortunately, when I was a baby christian I became unequally yoked, which led me astray for a very long time from the Lord. if i was you I would break up with Him and explain to him why you feel convicted to do so. If he loves you and would do anything for you he would understand
 
W

wolfywolfs

Guest
#3
#3
ask yourself this do you love him do you care for him does he make you happy will dumping him make you sad if you answered yes to these then i think you know the answer the bible says alot of things but no one ever ever ever has followed each rule they just cherry pick and like you say god loves and forgives all and if he cant understand your love for this man then well hes not a very powerful god is he
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#4
Aug 2, 2009
24,581
4,269
113
#4
The verse about being unequally yoked has got to be the most misunderstood verse in the bible.

I heard this from an evangelical pastor on the radio. He said that it does not mean to break off ties with all unbelievers. What it means is to not be involved with someone whose unbelief is much stronger than your own faith. Someone who might easily convince you to discard your Chrisitan faith. That is what the scripture means when its say not to be UNEQUALLY yoked.

If you have a strong faith then you don't have to worry about being yoked with an unbeliever.
 
Last edited:
C

cc11

Guest
#5
#5
HI, cc11 here, i was the original poster of the question - I would just like to request some more advice as I am only a new Christian....

I talked to him about how I felt, and How I wanted to become a better Christian and devote my life to Jesus. and he was extremely supportive, although he's not a Christian he did grow up in a very Christian based home, therefore he know and understands where I am coming from.

He also says that he will take me to church as I can't go without him driving me. and also offered to get me a bible.

He said he was once a Christian when he was 12 but it faded and he became uninterested.

I told him that I will not have premarital sex and he was totally fine with that and accepted my wish and said I was worth the wait.

He says he God might give him a sign and "who knows" (as n to say he might be saved one day)

As I said earlier I am a new Christian and I need advice please.

I will keep praying that God guides me through this and shows me the plan he has for my life
 
M

mamaharv

Guest
#6
#6
I married a non believer and thought he would change,but he didn't.I believed I could change him but it changed me.I drifted away from the Lord and wasted alot of years.I came back to the Lord and always hoped he would want to be a part of my church and come to Jesus but that has never happened.I was married to him for 32 years and have been separated for 10.I am much closer to the Lord now and much happier.I truly believe when the bible says do not be unequally yoked it is there for a reason.I am not saying dump him but stand your ground and if he fully shares your faith in Christ then thats great but if not God has someone out there just for you.
 
D

dmdave17

Guest
#7
#7
cc11 said:
HI, cc11 here, i was the original poster of the question - I would just like to request some more advice as I am only a new Christian....

I talked to him about how I felt, and How I wanted to become a better Christian and devote my life to Jesus. and he was extremely supportive, although he's not a Christian he did grow up in a very Christian based home, therefore he know and understands where I am coming from.

He also says that he will take me to church as I can't go without him driving me. and also offered to get me a bible.

He said he was once a Christian when he was 12 but it faded and he became uninterested.

I told him that I will not have premarital sex and he was totally fine with that and accepted my wish and said I was worth the wait.

He says he God might give him a sign and "who knows" (as n to say he might be saved one day)

As I said earlier I am a new Christian and I need advice please.

I will keep praying that God guides me through this and shows me the plan he has for my life
Click to expand...
Dear cc11,

I hope I am not intruding, but did you ever think about really witnessing to your boyfriend? It sounds like he would be receptive to the message of the Gospel if it came from you. God may be using you to bring your boyfriend back to Him, also.
 
A

AnandaHya

Guest
#8
#8
cc11 said:
HI, I decided today that I want to have better relationship with Jesus - I've always had a relationship wth Jesus but now I've just really decided to devote my life

I don't want to do the wrong thing by having a non Christian boyfriend and I fear it's not right because of what it says in the bible about not be unevenly yoked to others.

But i cant stand the thought of breaking up with him. I love my boyfriend so much and can't imagine my life without him. He would do anything for me.

I can't talk to anyone in my family, but should i try talk to someone before I decided to break up.

or should I wait a while to see if he follows in my witness and sees the love of God in me. then becomes saved?

I really need some advice please....
Click to expand...
if he loves you stay with him, if he does not lead you away from Jesus or tells you not to go to church or doesn't beat you or cheat on you, then you should stay with him. in your heart you have already married him, and the bible says not to leave or divorce an unbeliever but if the unbeliever leaves you are free to marry and find a Christian mate. However, you must follow what God tells you.

I left my exboyfriend because he was a nonbeliever that wanted me to worship Hindu and Buddhist Idols with him and attend those services. i went but i never worshipped them. however, God eventually got the message that though I loved him and he loved me, he really wasn't the right guy for me. He went to church with me and he told me I should go to Wat or Temple with him to be fair He quoted how Paul ate food sacrificed to idols in his ministry to save them. It took me a while to realize he was just wrong and that God did not want me with him. so as long as your faith in God remains strong you will lead him to the Lord. that is what happened to my little brother, his now wife brought him to Jesus last year, i've been trying for over a decade.
 
Last edited:
M

mac6375

Guest
#9
#9
If he's not married to you, then there is no biblical foundation for staying with him, and in fact, as far as God's concerned, it's better to end the relationship unless he becomes a christian. It's fact that more than likely, when 2 are unequally yoked, the one who is unsaved more than likely will bring down the one who is saved. I'm not saying just call him up and tell him right at this moment that you are done with him. Discuss where he stands with God, and ultimately if he doesn't want to be a christian, them you need to break it off until or unless he does become christian. I don't doubt he's a great guy, but scripture is quite clear about this.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.