Need help with relationship

[Vandher]

Dont really know where to start with this post,, we had a long talk the other day wasn't nearly as diffclut as I thought it would be. Anyway she asked me if I would speak with her parents('gulp') before I deceided anything and I did.

We practcaly told them everything and to my supprise they actualy gave their blessings to us. Now they have laid some ground rules as to what we may and may not do but overall I get the feeling that her parents respected the way I treated their daugther and our honesty with them. Her mother told me that she knew her daugther would meet somone older, givin the fact that she is very mature for her age.

It feels as if a whole lot of weight has lifted form my shoulders, though I still have to respect her and ofcourse be prepared to wait till the time right.

 

[mickoh10]

Not to be cruel but my husband is 12 years older than me. I met him (in person) on my 21st birthday, so in a way I think God planned it well so Id be a legal adult lol.
I have previously asked my husband, what would you have done if we grew up together in the same church community? His answer, he would have been attracted to me, but he would have ran for his life given how different our life stages were and what would happen to both of our reputations if such a relationship occurred then.

My thought is this:
What is the point of dating, if not for marriage? And in the bible, it refers to courtship and marriage as a process of leaving and cleaving your parents, being emotionally, and financially ready for marriage ie having a job, and living a life where a wife could fit into.
This young girl is still at high school and still under the biblical and legal jurisdiction of her parents. You may potentially be ready for a wife, but she practically speaking is not.

I will agree with you on this one, I too have fallen for girls way below my age and those way a head of my age, but the main reason on should think about dating should be when you are going in with the attitude of marrying.
That girl is way too young in my opinion and looking scriptural, what you need is a helper not just a woman, clearly examine yourself and also her, it might just be hot passions at the moment that might end up losing the fire the moment you get to know each other well enough.It is what I went into of recent and now I am all regrets....

 

[Robotsamurai]

Having dated someone thirteen years younger than me for almost two years. I'll offer my advice/suggestions. OK so she was 23 when we first started dating. The ministers were happy with it, but unfortunately she did have issues so they cloud things somewhat. She did have issues forming a marriage based emotional connection. Things cooled off each time it got marriage serious. So I'll mention.

As others have said she is way too young. If it us God's will you will be together. For the time being I would suggest backing off slightly and remaining friends. If you remain really close it will build a stronger emotional tie between you that she might not be able to commit to. The last thing you want to do is hurt either of you or your faith. Trust God.
You also don't want to cause any complications with your fellow brothers and sisters at church.
Discuss the situation with your ministers. Let them know the situation. If they know it they can offer support and advice.

I would also recommend reading a book called Boy Meets Girl by Joshua Harris. It will prepare your for a relationship and caution you on pursuing one too soon.

 

[alexis]

So this is a really old post!

But I read through every comment.

I pray he left her alone. I turn 16 in a short period of time and have to say there is no way she knows what she wants. This is not an okay situation. If you have those kind of feelings for someone my age at his age... You can not even be friends with her.. If you love her get away from her, she is a child. I know cause while in some ways I'm mature in other ways I'm a kid.

Things like this is why I am not allowed to and should not date. At my age we can not make sound dating relationships we get crushes, they change, we dream things that aren't realistic, we can make mistakes that damage us forever.

OP let her study Jesus and learn to love as He told us to love!

I know this sounds very opinionated and there may be an exception but I doubt it

 

[RedTent]

For what it is worth, here is my experience. I was 14, he was 19. He told me he wanted us to be married. I felt we would be married, but I explained I was a child and I wanted to have that experience. I couldn't if he was around. He was able to leave town, and he did. We didn't write. He came back about every six months to check on me. We were so closely connected that I simply knew when he would be coming, it was an inner feeling. I went away to college. When I was 19 we were married. People thought it was a whirlwind romance.

That was so long ago that even movie stars wore regular clothes and no one waved sex in front of our faces all the time. He wouldn't consider disrespecting me with sex, nor did the idea of sex before we were married occur to me, even though our attraction to each other was very strong. The thought of seduction is more Hollywood''s and the Kinsey Report's idea that is quite recent than either you or her ideas. Surely you can each follow Christ and not Hollywood!

 

[Ugly]

Having dated someone thirteen years younger than me for almost two years. I'll offer my advice/suggestions. OK so she was 23 when we first started dating. The ministers were happy with it, but unfortunately she did have issues so they cloud things somewhat. She did have issues forming a marriage based emotional connection. Things cooled off each time it got marriage serious. So I'll mention.

As others have said she is way too young. If it us God's will you will be together. For the time being I would suggest backing off slightly and remaining friends. If you remain really close it will build a stronger emotional tie between you that she might not be able to commit to. The last thing you want to do is hurt either of you or your faith. Trust God.
You also don't want to cause any complications with your fellow brothers and sisters at church.
Discuss the situation with your ministers. Let them know the situation. If they know it they can offer support and advice.

I would also recommend reading a book called Boy Meets Girl by Joshua Harris. It will prepare your for a relationship and caution you on pursuing one too soon.

This thread is a year and a half old and the OP hasn't logged in in all that time.