I have a ministry to people with bipolar disorder and most of them have had a lot of problems in marriage. I think it is hard to mix a mental illness with a relationship. It is hard for people to understand that a lot of the things you do might come from the mental illness, rather than being targeted at the significant other.
Also, you display a lot of "neediness" and "black and white" thinking in your posts. Meaning that you seem to be "all or nothing" in your relationships, athough putting God first is a good new beginning. Do you see a psychatrist? Are you on medication? Those things can help stabilize you.
As far as meeting someone, always be on mission with Christ. If he wants you to have a significant other, he will lead you to the right person. In the meantime, be sure to ask yourself "What am I doing for God?" Too often, people make their relationship about what God can do for them, and not what they can do for God. (Not saying you are like this, just a general principle!)
And paragraphs! That means leave a white space between thoughts. A few lines together is fine. After that, it is hard to follow, even with a finger on the screen.
God bless!