It's somewhat important for me. I learned my lesson from my previous relationship. I couldn't honestly tell my girlfriend I thought she was beautiful. She was, well, plain. In the past I disregarded physical attraction for purely personality, but now I see I'm not quite wired that way. She needs to at least be good looking. But not supermodelish - I would probably be turned off by that.
Physical attraction...
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Looks are really not that important. Looks sometimes are a bit of the initial attractor factor. Like if you see a good looking person on the street you might be more likely to appraoch. But after you talk to them it's what they say and what they're about that will then matter. They can't just be good looking to make a relationship work. Personality and values and what's in the heart is what counts the most.
L
Simply put, I think physical attractiveness is what draws in someone's attention but it is someone's personality that hooks them ^.^
Or also, i dont know bout any of y'all but for me, you see someone who at first is not that attractive but you start talking to them and you're attracted to their personality first, you begin to think their outer appearance is attractive too.
Or also, i dont know bout any of y'all but for me, you see someone who at first is not that attractive but you start talking to them and you're attracted to their personality first, you begin to think their outer appearance is attractive too.
Friends,
I am glad this is being talked about, and I like a lot of the comments I have heard. In this I can only really address the dudes, we have to be one woman men. When I say this of course I mean physically being with one woman, but there is also more to this. This almost goes unsaid, but we cannot be looking at porn. It is SO destructive in the lives of christian men. It WILL keep you from having deep intimacy with your wife. This also includes lusting after girls who walk by and eyeing them up. Yes, the media and culture makes this extremely difficult, but we as men need to rise up and fight it so we can LOVE our wives! So we can LOVE our daughters because if sexual sin creeps into our lives it can be devastating.
There is a thing called the focus principle. There has been studies done on sexual attraction and there are findings that help support biblical teachings on marriage and attraction. The principle goes like this, imagine you are walking through the woods and as you take a path not taken before you start a small path. The more you walk down this path the easier it is to take and the more often it tends to be taken. In the same way our brains work like that. If you are looking at pornography the path becomes more tread on and you will continue to go down it. That becomes the preferred method of pleasure. One example is a guy would perform sexual acts with cowboy boots in the mix. He did it so often that boots to him was a trigger for that pleasure that is to come. He got married and lined his room full of boots because he would have trouble loving his wife without them.
So with that said, it is super important for husbands to see their wives as ''their standard of beauty''. If your wife is young, you are into young. If your wife has freckles, you are into freckles. If your wife has blonde hair, you are into blonde hair. If your wife is old, you are into old. If your wife is 'big boned' you are into big boned. I hope you get the picture. As single men it is important to overcome sexual sin, if we are in it, and or avoid it. So when we become married guys we can let our wives be our standard of beauty.
If you are keeping a pure heart and not giving into the lust of the eyes I promise girls will become even more attractive. When you meet that girl who loves Jesus as much or even more than you, that will become the most attractive part of her if you are following Jesus. Looks will become less of an issue.
Don't get me wrong I believe an initial physical attraction can be important but this is what Proverbs says.
Proverbs 31:1
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
I hope my words have been encouraging, and I hope all of you who are married are inspired to love your wife more. For the single guys I hope you are inspired to become a man and follow Jesus, get a job, work hard, pay your bills, and serve others. When you get that down than find a wife, love her. We have the Holy Spirit in us, the power that raised Christ from the dead. Continue to follow him the rest of your life.
In Christ
I am glad this is being talked about, and I like a lot of the comments I have heard. In this I can only really address the dudes, we have to be one woman men. When I say this of course I mean physically being with one woman, but there is also more to this. This almost goes unsaid, but we cannot be looking at porn. It is SO destructive in the lives of christian men. It WILL keep you from having deep intimacy with your wife. This also includes lusting after girls who walk by and eyeing them up. Yes, the media and culture makes this extremely difficult, but we as men need to rise up and fight it so we can LOVE our wives! So we can LOVE our daughters because if sexual sin creeps into our lives it can be devastating.
There is a thing called the focus principle. There has been studies done on sexual attraction and there are findings that help support biblical teachings on marriage and attraction. The principle goes like this, imagine you are walking through the woods and as you take a path not taken before you start a small path. The more you walk down this path the easier it is to take and the more often it tends to be taken. In the same way our brains work like that. If you are looking at pornography the path becomes more tread on and you will continue to go down it. That becomes the preferred method of pleasure. One example is a guy would perform sexual acts with cowboy boots in the mix. He did it so often that boots to him was a trigger for that pleasure that is to come. He got married and lined his room full of boots because he would have trouble loving his wife without them.
So with that said, it is super important for husbands to see their wives as ''their standard of beauty''. If your wife is young, you are into young. If your wife has freckles, you are into freckles. If your wife has blonde hair, you are into blonde hair. If your wife is old, you are into old. If your wife is 'big boned' you are into big boned. I hope you get the picture. As single men it is important to overcome sexual sin, if we are in it, and or avoid it. So when we become married guys we can let our wives be our standard of beauty.
If you are keeping a pure heart and not giving into the lust of the eyes I promise girls will become even more attractive. When you meet that girl who loves Jesus as much or even more than you, that will become the most attractive part of her if you are following Jesus. Looks will become less of an issue.
Don't get me wrong I believe an initial physical attraction can be important but this is what Proverbs says.
Proverbs 31:1
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
I hope my words have been encouraging, and I hope all of you who are married are inspired to love your wife more. For the single guys I hope you are inspired to become a man and follow Jesus, get a job, work hard, pay your bills, and serve others. When you get that down than find a wife, love her. We have the Holy Spirit in us, the power that raised Christ from the dead. Continue to follow him the rest of your life.
In Christ
Upon meeting and becoming friends with someone I deem to be a true man of God, someone of incredibly dignified character and Integrity. I realized something profound. I realized what the main relational significance was between a man chasing after the things of God, and a boy trying to play the former with impressive theology. It’s simply this: the man of God wants a woman of God as a spouse. Above all, he wants the lady that is prized far more than rubies. The boy, simply put, wants a woman of God… And hot looks. And a rockin’ body. And dare I say it, a nice “rack” too.
So many times I have witnessed so many young men being caught up with superficiality when it comes to searching for a spouse. “There are no women of God!” they grumble. That’s an insult. There are so many women out there waiting, and praying, and hoping for a godly man. What the young man is really saying is that, “There’s no hot women who are kind of spiritual and into the things of God!” and that is because pornography, Hollywood, and the world has tainted and warped the views of even the Christian male. It no longer becomes about what’s inward, because the boy is driven into the flesh. It becomes about the prettier face. Pornography and the media twists expectations of what a woman should be, even with her clothes on. A flawless face, a perfect smile, the slight pout.
I need to put a bit of a disclaimer here. I know that guys could easily throw this around and say that girls are no better. And I know that. I completely agree they aren't any better. But realize I’m not addressing the females who want a guy with the perfect looks. Rather, I’m addressing the ones who are waiting for a true warrior—the man after God’s own heart.
I can hear a protest coming on. About how I’m being harsh on my brothers. No, it’s not about that. It’s about piercing the heart with undiluted truth. I have seen this occur first hand in churches today. I have even heard with my own ears, a conversation between two boys about how they would date “so and so” if she was a little thinner and prettier. And it is truly sickening because “so and so”- whilst she wasn’t Megan Fox or Scarlett Johansson—she was maturing in the Lord. Yet, because she was a little overweight, she was dismissed as any sort of potential companion.
You boys don’t want a woman of God. You just want a spiritual pornstar.
Fact: looks will fade. The man of God understands this, and pursues the woman who will complement his heart in Christ Jesus, not flatter his ego of pride. Who will bring him good, all the days of her life. Love is so much deeper than what’s on the outward.
Biblically, take a look at Jacob. He fled to his uncle, and there he met beautiful Rachel. He was smitten. Who cares if later in the marriage she was a thieving, lying, envious idolatress? She was a stunner. She was not weak eyed as her sister.
Ah, but Leah was a woman who knew the Lord. She blessed His holy name after she bore Judah. She was grafted into the Messiah’s line through her acknowledgement and love for the Lord. She was saved through childbirth. Rachel was not. Leah made the entire journey. Rachel did not. Jacob was a man of the flesh when he fell hard for Rachel. Jacob became a man of the Lord after he wrestled the angel. (Rachel died soon after).
I’m not saying that you should marry someone you are not physically attracted to. God forbid. But I am saying that the reality is that looks will fade. If you base looking for a spouse on their outward appearance, you will sorely regret it. Because wrinkles will sprout, and grey hairs will soon follow. Everything will begin to sag. And then what? What happens then? Go out and replace your spouse? It doesn’t work like that.
To the boys, man up. Go out and die somewhere. Realize that there is so much more to life, particularly the life in Christ, than artificial looks and fake tans. There’s an old saying that says, “Faint heart never won fair maiden.” We could turn this around and say, “Carnal heart never won God’s maiden.” Go out, and start hungering for the things of the Lord. Serve. Love. Die.
To the ladies, Don’t stoop low and compromise modesty just for the boys’ attention. Bring even the most carnal Christian guy honour by dressing with modesty and dignity. If you truly desire a man of God, and not an impostor boy, then do not begin flaunting your body just for the extra gazes and the occasional wolf whistle.
So many times I have witnessed so many young men being caught up with superficiality when it comes to searching for a spouse. “There are no women of God!” they grumble. That’s an insult. There are so many women out there waiting, and praying, and hoping for a godly man. What the young man is really saying is that, “There’s no hot women who are kind of spiritual and into the things of God!” and that is because pornography, Hollywood, and the world has tainted and warped the views of even the Christian male. It no longer becomes about what’s inward, because the boy is driven into the flesh. It becomes about the prettier face. Pornography and the media twists expectations of what a woman should be, even with her clothes on. A flawless face, a perfect smile, the slight pout.
I need to put a bit of a disclaimer here. I know that guys could easily throw this around and say that girls are no better. And I know that. I completely agree they aren't any better. But realize I’m not addressing the females who want a guy with the perfect looks. Rather, I’m addressing the ones who are waiting for a true warrior—the man after God’s own heart.
I can hear a protest coming on. About how I’m being harsh on my brothers. No, it’s not about that. It’s about piercing the heart with undiluted truth. I have seen this occur first hand in churches today. I have even heard with my own ears, a conversation between two boys about how they would date “so and so” if she was a little thinner and prettier. And it is truly sickening because “so and so”- whilst she wasn’t Megan Fox or Scarlett Johansson—she was maturing in the Lord. Yet, because she was a little overweight, she was dismissed as any sort of potential companion.
You boys don’t want a woman of God. You just want a spiritual pornstar.
Fact: looks will fade. The man of God understands this, and pursues the woman who will complement his heart in Christ Jesus, not flatter his ego of pride. Who will bring him good, all the days of her life. Love is so much deeper than what’s on the outward.
Biblically, take a look at Jacob. He fled to his uncle, and there he met beautiful Rachel. He was smitten. Who cares if later in the marriage she was a thieving, lying, envious idolatress? She was a stunner. She was not weak eyed as her sister.
Ah, but Leah was a woman who knew the Lord. She blessed His holy name after she bore Judah. She was grafted into the Messiah’s line through her acknowledgement and love for the Lord. She was saved through childbirth. Rachel was not. Leah made the entire journey. Rachel did not. Jacob was a man of the flesh when he fell hard for Rachel. Jacob became a man of the Lord after he wrestled the angel. (Rachel died soon after).
I’m not saying that you should marry someone you are not physically attracted to. God forbid. But I am saying that the reality is that looks will fade. If you base looking for a spouse on their outward appearance, you will sorely regret it. Because wrinkles will sprout, and grey hairs will soon follow. Everything will begin to sag. And then what? What happens then? Go out and replace your spouse? It doesn’t work like that.
To the boys, man up. Go out and die somewhere. Realize that there is so much more to life, particularly the life in Christ, than artificial looks and fake tans. There’s an old saying that says, “Faint heart never won fair maiden.” We could turn this around and say, “Carnal heart never won God’s maiden.” Go out, and start hungering for the things of the Lord. Serve. Love. Die.
To the ladies, Don’t stoop low and compromise modesty just for the boys’ attention. Bring even the most carnal Christian guy honour by dressing with modesty and dignity. If you truly desire a man of God, and not an impostor boy, then do not begin flaunting your body just for the extra gazes and the occasional wolf whistle.
So you'll only date someone who stays in shape? Heart-attacks and pacemakers are out? 
I do like guys who are good looking and in shape.
But what comes to dating-it is not only about that-but also-how i feel around that guy, how he treats me-and all that
He should be my best friend-and only thn-my lover.
I don't think that i understand your last question...
