struglle being single

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hellobacky

Guest
#1
#1
i have read many post on this site about being well prepared and rejoiced in singlenss.I UNDERSTAND(in mind) that we need to put Lord first before we get into relationship,but i really worry that i may not find the right one until i am TOO old,maybr 35.40?I didnt expect the other one can bring me more joy,but being singleness really give me too much pressure.Also i didnt see any chance that i may meet the right one,not so many good "Brothers" in church....
 
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lavender_lily

Guest
#2
#2
Hiya, Hellobacky! I understand your feelings of knowing that it's good to be content on being single since it allows more freedom to focus on God, and all the while desiring a godly, earthly relationship with a man. I never thought I'd be engaged, because I had lost hope in finding a "good cookie" and began to distrust men ... all the while thinking they were "rotten eggs." My mom got onto me a lot telling me that not all men were bad and that I needed to lighten up. My thoughts and emotions had been greatly affected by my father's verbal abuse and my mom having been in multiple marriages. I had been praying to God that he'd show me who "the one" was. I got caught up in asking God to show me who the right guy was by him calling me "angel".... just so I'd be sure.
I honestly don't believe "the one" exists. When people get caught up in thinking "their perfect match" is out in the world somewhere, they could end up overlooking some very great people (in this case men) in which to develop a relationship with. I feel that God does have many people out there that could match up with you well. And as long as you keep praying and waiting .... he'll bring one your way. He won't be perfect since he's human... but if he's godly, he will be willing to meet your needs and love you how he's called to.
I was lucky enough that God sent a man my way and it took around three years of growing a friendship for me to realize I wanted to date him. Now we are engaged, and I love being able to finally serve and love a man that is willing to serve and love me. I was going through a lot of depression and God new I needed a good, godly friend to help me out. And and engagement, and future marriage, is growing out of that friendship ... thanks to our Great God!
God knows the desire of your heart, and he knows what you have need of even before you speak it. I'm sure that God will meet that need in time.... just keep an eye out! Please, don't lose hope.... there are great, godly men in the world who are willing to be those that live in it, but are not of it. Sadly, there are a lot of "christians" in church.... and I'm sorry that you feel there aren't really any good men in your church. Maybe there is and you don't see it? If there isn't.... God will find a man for you elsewhere.
 
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Ugly

Guest
#3
#3
'Too old' to find the right one? What does that even mean?
 
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hellobacky

Guest
#4
#4
'too old to find the right one' means i am afraid i become too old and cant find the right one because man at my age or older than me almost all get married
 
RushBreeze

RushBreeze

Member
#5
Dec 20, 2011
70
5
8
#5
Take heart! God knows the desires of our heart and when they line up with his plan for us he will deliver, just not always when we expect. Though I have to admit I know the fear you are feeling, we are both young, but when you see all your friends and family getting married it can be very disheartening.

I am lucky to have family friends where the parents met when they were both in their 40's. It was a first marriage for both of them, they were both waiting on God to direct them to the right spouse for them. They have been married now for 25 years and have a beautiful little family and are more in love then most couples half their age.

I really hope I dont have to wait that long for God to show me who he wants my husband to be (if that is his will) but its encouraging for me to know that if its something he wants to happen he will, and that when he has a hand in it that he will bless it!
 
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PostWar

Guest
#6
#6
When we are with someone, we dedicate ourselves to them. They become the center of all our decisions.
Let whoever is single dedicate their lives to God, let them walk blameless along side God without the weight of worldly ideas and expectations.
I loved being single because I knew that from the moment I woke up every morning, I woke up with God.
I still feel that way but I am in a relationship right now and I hide most of my enthusiasm and communion with God and Angels.
God speaks to me and guides me. His voice drowns out the voice of my lover. I love Gods voice more than I love my lover. It is difficult for me to pay attention to my boyfriend at all. I am guilty of light neglect.
A boyfriend will expect for me to pay a lot of attention to him. I pretend that I think about this man the way he thinks of me when in truth, I can think of no man. No man will ever love me unconditionally, the way Jesus does. No man will ever show me the same forgiveness and selflessness God has.
It is not that I am not loving or appreciative of this man, he is very patient with me and God works through him as well.
And though God may direct me over the seas and into lands foreign to my eyes to deliver his message and his people... this man will only want me to make his coffee and dinner, to be there for him any moment he needs me. The man will always expect me to favor him and care for him much like a child. He will expect for me to marry him. And even if I did and he gave me my own Castle, even if my husband gave me my own Island and showed me all of the love a man is capable of, It still would not compare to the connection I have with my Holy Father.
Some of us are meant for marriage but others have a separate purpose, some will never marry and other will marry after God's purposes for them have been fulfilled. I know that my soul will not be able to rest beside a man in the confounds of marriage until I do what God told me to do.
Sometimes we think we know what is best for us, we look to others to fill the empty places and moments in our lives. We have to remember that we have a Father and that he loves us so much that he has a plan for you unlike his plan for anyone else. You individually are favored and called upon by God for a specific purpose. His plans for you are greater than the greatest plans or fate you could ever imagine for yourself. Whether it happens or not, whether the power and blessing of God make manifest is all a matter of how much you truly believe it and want it. God Bless You
 
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