The NEW NORMAL? You've MAYBE heard this about the economy. What about relationships?

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GreenNnice

Guest
#1
#1
Stock markets down. Growth appears stagnant. Money is tight. Employment is near 10 %.
Generally, people are needing to switch up their styles and change gears to live life. I just heard other day that people are adjusting to making less, therefore, spending less, in their life. What does all this mean in the world of relationships, guy-girl mindsets on relationships? Although seperate topics, relationships and economics, the 'new normal' of things not going to be the way they used to be seem congruent....the stock market won't go up like used to in past, food prices will only go up, gas prices, ditto. Money and relationships don't have to but for a lot of folks they just do, at least some money.

What if the MONEY is not there, can there still be a relationship, can your standards change in this brave new world we live in today ?

What is the new normal for getting to know a guy / gal in this world we live in? How does God fit in?
Have you changed your way of looking at getting to know opposite sex based on current life realities?

Hopefully, I am not being too pessimistic. The Lord leads :)
 
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persecuted

Banned
#2
Jun 15, 2011
308
0
0
#2
Came across a hot drunk the other day who said she had no future and was just going to live it up while she could. Couldn't really come up with anything to tell her she was wrong. I see the future as being like the African way. Just have sex, have kids, and let the universe take care of it all... although I have already found some on here getting ready to donate to the women I might impregnate. They say its christian duty.
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
#3
#3
persecuted said:
Came across a hot drunk the other day who said she had no future and was just going to live it up while she could. Couldn't really come up with anything to tell her she was wrong. I see the future as being like the African way. Just have sex, have kids, and let the universe take care of it all... although I have already found some on here getting ready to donate to the women I might impregnate. They say its christian duty.
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That's not the 'new normal' for relationships, persecuted, is it for indusrialized nations? Dear God, I pray NO!
But....if yes, persecuted, doesn't't that kind of carousing 'new normal' sound a lot like long ago...

Are you still with me, friend (by the way, I asked you to be my friend on c.c. :) ) ?

But, if you are still following my train of thought, with a 'new normal' of our society (not saying christian society, necessarily) going toward 'that,' Africa AIDS way of life and sin rampant all over, doesn't that sound like a particular chapter of Genesis? Chapter 5 come to mind :)
And just what did happen way back in the beginning of time, a 1000 years after man, and, woman, were created?

What persecuted?
What!

Sorry, not meaning to yell like holy Hell at you, but what happened when God saw that the people He created were engaging in acts contrary to fulfilling God His glory, persecuted?

Death....to all but a few humans, and, animals, that faithfully boarded an ark.

Death. So those that are impregnating the women now not in marriage are DOING the VERY thing that caused God to end the world the first time around.

He is coming again. :)

I pray for God to change your heart, persecuted, for your negative, bearing, boring (not 'boring' in the Ho-hum sense), heart to be bored through with holiness from God, whom it says (on your profile on c.c.) you met 'long ago,' or , at least that fact tells me you know salvation is out there, for you :)
 
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thimsrebma

Guest
#4
#4
What if the MONEY is not there, can there still be a relationship, can your standards change in this brave new world we live in today ?

I actually was thinking about that the other day. As far as financial standards go, many people have been laid off therefore unemployed or taking jobs for less salary. What does that mean to me as a woman who expects a man to be the financial provider? Unfortunately I really have no answer for that right now. I don't want to change my standards but at the same time, it would be a really unfortunate for me to overlook someone who just last week had a good job and was on clear career path, but got laid off due to company closing or downsizing. I really don't know yet.

What is the new normal for getting to know a guy / gal in this world we live in? How does God fit in?
Have you changed your way of looking at getting to know opposite sex based on current life realities?

To me, all these other things just stay the same. I don't see why a down economy would change the way you meet someone. I guess it could change what you do on a date because you may want to do something cheaper or free even. But I prefer free stuff any way.
 
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Jullianna

Guest
#5
#5
I think we're all just going to have to tightened our belts. Maybe we should anyway. I know I could certainly be a better steward than I am. There's always room for improvement.

Some of this might be a little scary for people who are younger and maybe just starting out, but I think that those of us who've struggled through marriage, children, college, and other situations that bring about lean times understand that when it come right down to it, it's just stuff and there were times when we had less and were far happier than now. STUFF takes time away from people you love because you 1. have to earn the money to pay for the stuff; and 2. You spend too much time taking care of the stuff.

I've been downsizing for the past two years and I have to say it's much less stressful because I don't have as much to take care of and have more funds available to plan for the future. I'm not going to count on Social Security, etc. being there when it's time for me to retire. It's too risky.

I agree with Amber. There are a lot of amazing things to do and see that are absolutely free.
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
#6
#6
thimsrebma said:
What if the MONEY is not there, can there still be a relationship, can your standards change in this brave new world we live in today ?

I actually was thinking about that the other day. As far as financial standards go, many people have been laid off therefore unemployed or taking jobs for less salary. What does that mean to me as a woman who expects a man to be the financial provider? Unfortunately I really have no answer for that right now. I don't want to change my standards but at the same time, it would be a really unfortunate for me to overlook someone who just last week had a good job and was on clear career path, but got laid off due to company closing or downsizing. I really don't know yet.

What is the new normal for getting to know a guy / gal in this world we live in? How does God fit in?
Have you changed your way of looking at getting to know opposite sex based on current life realities?

To me, all these other things just stay the same. I don't see why a down economy would change the way you meet someone. I guess it could change what you do on a date because you may want to do something cheaper or free even. But I prefer free stuff any way.
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Cows it going msamber, you been to the feed store lately , well, I shar don't want to give this thread a bum steer, so, quickly replying to what you said, I will say this: exactly. I believe the 'new normal' for societal living for the majority of people will be to lower your standards. You will have to because incomes will not be what they used to be, at least not in the foreseeable future, as I see it, anyway.

Yes, msamb, exactly , men are the financial provider in the past, but that's changed too, the game's really changed economically, all over, not just usages, but global anxiety is everywhere, and, now to not preach doom and gloom completely, God is in control of everything and focusing on Him, and, well, just hmmm, seriously asking God to help you adapt to the 'new normal' of our lives is what I would prayerfully ask those with great angst to do. Free stuff to do, good point, Yes, we can do a lot of stuff for free.
:)
Sing a little Twila Paris for comfort , you will hear her , 'God is in control.' And, He's not just in control of some things, He's in control of everything :)

Yeah, Satan, eat your heart out, cuz you got nothing IF God so says. Not a single thing, and, what 'Jobs' God's given you control of making miserable now one day (I'm guessing sooner than later ;) ) will end :)
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Ok, sorry if some don't want/didn't't want to year all that, but it's important you put Satan under your FEET (LET the Lord lead, but take control of that SNAKE ! :)

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And, Yes, julieannie, downsizing is a good thing and it's true that stuff buying, stuff organizingg, stuff reorganizing, and, just working to pay for the STUFF consumes our time. Wise words :)

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I SAY THIS THOUGH, STUFF , SOME STUFF IS IMPORTANT. And that act is good sometimes, the Lord leads.
It's ingrained stuff in some of us, especially you girls . :p

You can take the girl out of the shopping mall, but you can't take the shopping out of the girl.

I'm kidding. Kidding. B-I-N-G, oh wait, wrong word, ladies, kidding, k-I-d-d :D
 
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allforfun

Guest
#7
#7
Downsizing is good. Put paying rent, using transportation and paying for electricity is important in my books.

I have been working many years on my own for the things that I like and need and honestly in a relationship or marriage, I am not prepared to give that up. I don't want to sound snotty at all with that. But I am 35 and not 17 again. I am not naive and think love will pay the bills. I starved in college and I could do it again, but I don't want to have to if I have the ability to pay for "stuff" too. That is silly.

I have said it before and I say it again, expectations change and usually get slammed in out faces forcing us to choose a different path. I expected a great many different things at this point, not the road I am. I'm enjoying this road far better anyway.
 
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persecuted

Banned
#8
Jun 15, 2011
308
0
0
#8
GreenNnice said:
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That's not the 'new normal' for relationships, persecuted, is it for indusrialized nations? Dear God, I pray NO!
But....if yes, persecuted, doesn't't that kind of carousing 'new normal' sound a lot like long ago...

Are you still with me, friend (by the way, I asked you to be my friend on c.c. :) ) ?

But, if you are still following my train of thought, with a 'new normal' of our society (not saying christian society, necessarily) going toward 'that,' Africa AIDS way of life and sin rampant all over, doesn't that sound like a particular chapter of Genesis? Chapter 5 come to mind :)
And just what did happen way back in the beginning of time, a 1000 years after man, and, woman, were created?

What persecuted?
What!

Sorry, not meaning to yell like holy Hell at you, but what happened when God saw that the people He created were engaging in acts contrary to fulfilling God His glory, persecuted?

Death....to all but a few humans, and, animals, that faithfully boarded an ark.

Death. So those that are impregnating the women now not in marriage are DOING the VERY thing that caused God to end the world the first time around.

He is coming again. :)

I pray for God to change your heart, persecuted, for your negative, bearing, boring (not 'boring' in the Ho-hum sense), heart to be bored through with holiness from God, whom it says (on your profile on c.c.) you met 'long ago,' or , at least that fact tells me you know salvation is out there, for you :)
Click to expand...

lol... exactly, yet when I say that is what God is doing to places like Haiti y'all get so mad at me. STILL can't understand where you guys get this apparent racist belief that God has standards for whitey but none for anyone else.
 
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thimsrebma

Guest
#9
#9
I am so happy to be so blessed. I guess for me I havn't really had to cut back much on anything. My job pays well, I did get insurance this contract period but I got a small raise too so its a difference of $90 a month. I can still make it. To be honest, I don't really know too many people who have been effected that bad by the economy.

It seems that this summer, we have been more effected by the heat wave than anything else. Last month my electric bill was $80 more expensive than last year at the same time.

I do agree with Jullianna though. When ever things happen in life you have to find some way to adjust. When you have a baby, move, taking care of parents. Those adjustments are more mental than anything though. Think about all the things that you have that you can live without. It may be hard to not have some ammenities and uncomfortable to give things up that you have grown accumstom to, but if it means tats the only way you can pay the bills, then so be it.
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
#10
#10
persecuted said:
lol... exactly, yet when I say that is what God is doing to places like Haiti y'all get so mad at me. STILL can't understand where you guys get this apparent racist belief that God has standards for whitey but none for anyone else.
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What are you referring too, perse, you totally lost me, but, don't worry, all is not lost...I am easily lost or maybe it's just not found.

What are you, perse? Lost, or, just unfound

By the way I think it's definitely founded that God likes whiteys and blackees, not to mention, reddees, and yellowees, all the same.

Jesus loves me this I know, for the bible tells me so...... :)
 
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Jullianna

Guest
#11
#11
*sings*
Jesus loves the little children
ALL the children of the world
Red and yellow, black and white
They are precious in His sight
Jesus loves the little children of the world!

Sing with me! :)
 
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Bridget_in_China

Guest
#12
#12
What ever do you mean? Are you saying that with the downturn in the economy, us girls will have to start paying our fair share of the dating expenses?? Is that even still called a date if I have to pay for myself..or (gasp!) you too? ;)

Obviously I'm being sarcastic. (just a teeny-weeny bit) I think with the economy in the state that it is in.. dating should be revolutionized! No longer should entitled princesses demand that their every wish be paid for by the boyfriend! :):ducks:: so as not to get pelted with the expensive handbags being thrown at her) I have a job that pays me for my work.. I should also help foot the bill for dates as well! (and I have in the past, when I was dating someone...) The relationship isn't one-sided.. so why should one party be stuck paying for everything? Because societal norms demand it?? Pphhtt...

Marriages and dating relationships are partnerships, or they should be. Both parties should contribute equally to the finances in my opinion. I don't recall reading anywhere in the bible where it says that the man has to be the financial provider. (Or even the sole provider) Re-read Proverbs 31 to see all the cool stuff the woman does to provide for her family. If I have missed something somewhere, please school me!

ok, Dead horse sufficiently beaten. :)
 
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niceguyJ

Senior Member
#13
Feb 5, 2011
520
25
28
#13
Bridget, I think I saw it move. You better hit it again! Really, I don't disagree with anything you said.

I don't see why "dating" would have to be so expensive. Then again, I'm easily amused. Just spending quality time with people talking or just hanging out is fine. I could care less about fancy pants dinners, etc.... The simple things in life are nice. Maybe I'm the wrong person to be answering this thread. :)
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
#14
#14
Bridget_in_China said:
What ever do you mean? Are you saying that with the downturn in the economy, us girls will have to start paying our fair share of the dating expenses?? Is that even still called a date if I have to pay for myself..or (gasp!) you too? ;)

Obviously I'm being sarcastic. (just a teeny-weeny bit) I think with the economy in the state that it is in.. dating should be revolutionized! No longer should entitled princesses demand that their every wish be paid for by the boyfriend! :):ducks:: so as not to get pelted with the expensive handbags being thrown at her) I have a job that pays me for my work.. I should also help foot the bill for dates as well! (and I have in the past, when I was dating someone...) The relationship isn't one-sided.. so why should one party be stuck paying for everything? Because societal norms demand it?? Pphhtt...

Marriages and dating relationships are partnerships, or they should be. Both parties should contribute equally to the finances in my opinion. I don't recall reading anywhere in the bible where it says that the man has to be the financial provider. (Or even the sole provider) Re-read Proverbs 31 to see all the cool stuff the woman does to provide for her family. If I have missed something somewhere, please school me!

ok, Dead horse sufficiently beaten. :)
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Bridge, the man I feel should be the provider monetarily in. Marriage, if he can be, i think scripture is clear on this matter but I need to find some reference support still. However, in extenuating circunstances, like this 'new normal' economy I feel that 'economy' is a great catalyst to forge a new normal for relationships, where lady pays on dates, lees expansive gift bought her during relationship, including the engagement and wedding rings.

Times are pushing us toward this new normal, and, of course, as i see it, and , most you too, the Lord is leading great change globally now.
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Good julieannie, well sung. :D
 
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