What are your relationship dealbreakers?

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MsMediator

Well-known member
Mar 8, 2022
953
612
93
#1
What are your relationship dealbreakers, besides religious requirements? This is intended to be a fun but slightly serious thread.

I'll start...

I am not an active outdoors person (hiking, biking, watersports, etc.), so I would not choose someone who likes these activities since that is a different lifestyle. I like being outdoors too, but I prefer sitting/walking on the beach or having a picnic.

I do not see living life without animals, so he must like cats and/or dogs.
 
N

notonmywatch

Guest
#2
What are your relationship dealbreakers, besides religious requirements?
As long as she's breathing, and she can count to 16 without having to take her shoes and socks off, I'm good.

:p
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
25,027
8,223
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#3
From what I have observed, the older you get and the more disillusioned you get, the smaller your list of deal breakers becomes. Or the older you get and the more experience you have with terrible people, the larger your list becomes. Either way it will change as you age.

For myself, I have no idea. If I ever meet a girl I want to date, I will have to see I can think of any deal breakers. Or maybe I won't.
 
N

notonmywatch

Guest
#5
From what I have observed, the older you get and the more disillusioned you get, the smaller your list of deal breakers becomes. Or the older you get and the more experience you have with terrible people, the larger your list becomes. Either way it will change as you age.

For myself, I have no idea. If I ever meet a girl I want to date, I will have to see I can think of any deal breakers. Or maybe I won't.
That bold-faced part pretty much describes me, but I wouldn't necessarily call all of the women (not that there were a lot of them) that I've had past relationships with "terrible people". Some of them truly were. They wore brilliantly-crafted masks, and, as if that wasn't bad enough, I also have a tendency to only see the good in others, whether they're wearing a mask or not, to my own peril. Other women? We just had different goals/desires, and it would have never worked, so I just walked away.
 

Sculpt

Well-known member
Apr 18, 2021
1,067
329
83
#6
What are your relationship dealbreakers, besides religious requirements? This is intended to be a fun but slightly serious thread.

I'll start...

I am not an active outdoors person (hiking, biking, watersports, etc.), so I would not choose someone who likes these activities since that is a different lifestyle. I like being outdoors too, but I prefer sitting/walking on the beach or having a picnic.

I do not see living life without animals, so he must like cats and/or dogs.
Interesting topic!

OUTDOOR SPORTS -
If you found out they liked hiking, biking and watersports you'd breakup with them on the spot? lol I kind of doubt that. Im guessing you might pass-by a dating profile that had that plastered all over it, but probably not a deal breaker if you "discovered that" on a date, right?

I mean, that's kind of the topic at hand, are there things you don't have to do together?
Like, you'd probably go walking/hiking in a nature preserve and love it. You might do light biking for a short period of time/distance, it's just your endurance wont be what his/she is at first. Your endurance would increase pretty fast, especially if you were enjoying it, like hiking through beautiful nature with someone you love. But you wouldnt want to do a 4-hour biking trip down highways your first time out; but a half hour through a beautiful park you might like.

But even if you didnt do those specific things with them, can't you do some things together and some things with friends? If you can both handle that, then that wouldn't be deal breaker, would it?

ANIMALS -
Maybe he/she wouldn't choose to live alone with a cat or dog, but he might be perfectly fine with cat/dog being in the house when youre married. That wouldnt be a deal breaker there, right? Now, if he/she said flatout they'll never live with a cat/dog, then that might be a deal breaker for you I suppose.

ME -
I expect people to be different, and I enjoy lots of things including new things. Im in good health, so I cant think of anything I wouldn't or couldnt try to do with them. It's hard to think of any "regular" things that would be a deal breaker, if I really liked them.

Deal breakers... I'd have to go with the big things like: cheating, extremely disrespectful/selfish, drug addict, and I'd have a tough time being with a smoker.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,178
113
#7
I think if someone has a passion that you don't share it could be hard to live with them lol

But I would think having any kind of relationship with a gambler, cheater, or addict would not work. Or someone who's like, in the occult, freemasonry, or the church of Scientology! Uh, no.

Christians can and do live with and even marry unbelievers, but I don't think that's the greatest idea since sliced bread to do that. I think the worst relationships I've seen that broke up was the believer thought they had married a fellow believer, but it turned out they were pretending all along. Talk about a Judas.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,345
16,317
113
69
Tennessee
#9
What are your relationship dealbreakers, besides religious requirements? This is intended to be a fun but slightly serious thread.

I'll start...

I am not an active outdoors person (hiking, biking, watersports, etc.), so I would not choose someone who likes these activities since that is a different lifestyle. I like being outdoors too, but I prefer sitting/walking on the beach or having a picnic.

I do not see living life without animals, so he must like cats and/or dogs.
We have two cats, Tango and Sugar. Very amusing social animals for sure.
 

Eli1

Well-known member
Apr 5, 2022
3,363
1,153
113
46
#11
hmm well I never really understood the whole pirate look myself.

You wanna look like a pirate, then at least talk like one as well. arrrr
It’s actually quite an honor that you’re talking to me directly Lanolin.
Thank you.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,178
113
#12
I know this one couple, he got an ebike so his wife had to get one too.
He got a campervan, so his wife had to clean it and stay in it too
he had a boat, so she had to go sailing in it too
He had a holiday home she had to clean the toilets there too
They also had a two storey mansion and she had to vaccum it as well to keep it clean. You know how big houses take ages to vacuum.

I dont think she ever complained, except when he was spending more time on the boat than with her. So when he sold the boat she said it saved their marriage and they had children instead.
 

arthurfleminger

Well-known member
Aug 18, 2021
1,405
771
113
#13
One of the worst 'dealbreakers' for a relationship is that of betrayel. In our lifetimes, most of us will suffer serious betrayel from a loved one, spouse/friend/family. If you are betrayed by a loved one the relationship will never be the same, even if you can bring yourself to forgive your betrayer.

Betrayel was even on the list of Jesus' sorrowful passion, betrayed by a hand picked Apostle..
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
25,027
8,223
113
#15
catholic, conservative, not into pot
Howdy far out and welcome to the forum.

Is that the list of deal breakers or necessities?

This is a thread for deal breakers, so in context it seems like you are saying a spouse must not be Catholic or conservative, and must enjoy smoking pot.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,345
16,317
113
69
Tennessee
#17
One of the worst 'dealbreakers' for a relationship is that of betrayel. In our lifetimes, most of us will suffer serious betrayel from a loved one, spouse/friend/family. If you are betrayed by a loved one the relationship will never be the same, even if you can bring yourself to forgive your betrayer.

Betrayel was even on the list of Jesus' sorrowful passion, betrayed by a hand picked Apostle..
I fully concur with your estimation.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
25,027
8,223
113
#19
Never mind. I see you already found it.