What are your thoughts on oral sex after marriage?

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May 6, 2011
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i dont know if you could even be sexually immoral with the one youre married to and supposed to be sexual with anyways. I mean if so is there a list of sexually moral positions somewhere in the bible that i somehow skipped over? Is playing Barry White to set the mood moral or immoral? What if we wanted to start with a nice bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon? Is that moral? I mean lets be honest there are a near-infinite lists of things a husband and wife could do with each other sexually. So unless there is a 'sexual ten commandments' for marriage somewhere in the bible i missed, i really dont think many arguments stating what can and cant be done between the two really hold any water at all.
 
Aug 2, 2009
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How come animals in nature don't have oral sex?

LOL just kidding
 
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Maddog

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i dont know if you could even be sexually immoral with the one youre married to and supposed to be sexual with anyways. I mean if so is there a list of sexually moral positions somewhere in the bible that i somehow skipped over? Is playing Barry White to set the mood moral or immoral? What if we wanted to start with a nice bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon? Is that moral? I mean lets be honest there are a near-infinite lists of things a husband and wife could do with each other sexually. So unless there is a 'sexual ten commandments' for marriage somewhere in the bible i missed, i really dont think many arguments stating what can and cant be done between the two really hold any water at all.
Do you believe all the nuances and details of moral law need to be found explicitly in the Bible?
 
May 6, 2011
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Do you believe all the nuances and details of moral law need to be found explicitly in the Bible?
well for this one i see a lot of personal opinions and interpretations but not a lot of facts or proof...
 
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karine___

Guest
i say this as a friend to whos reading , we can have many people telling us what we are allowed or not to do but only one God who gives us His Spirit to guide us to all Truth . on google u'll find many websites saying that "that" is OK , that once ur married what u do with ur partner is ur business and its all liberated , and i found only one website that was against that . but guys , God cannot be mocked, your relationship with Him is between HE AND YOU, not you and ur partner , just as salvation is personal . God gave us His law that is written on our hearts , our consciences also bearing witness . stop , listen to what His Spirit has to say to u , it may not always feel comfortable what He will say.

about the Song of Solomon ,i ask u honestly... would u give it that explanation that apple refers to "this" , that garden refers to "that"? its comfortable to just accept an interpretation and live "according to that "law", following rules from outside of ur heart" so our consciences will be eased , but to stop and develop a listening heart is more unconfortable , it takes time , it means getting rid of some things, it leads to a greater change ... but we all need to...
 
May 6, 2011
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again..more personal opinion and no actually proof...im pretty sure thats how it is going to stay too
 

Liamson

Senior Member
Feb 3, 2010
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i dont know if you could even be sexually immoral with the one youre married to and supposed to be sexual with anyways. I mean if so is there a list of sexually moral positions somewhere in the bible that i somehow skipped over? Is playing Barry White to set the mood moral or immoral? What if we wanted to start with a nice bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon? Is that moral? I mean lets be honest there are a near-infinite lists of things a husband and wife could do with each other sexually. So unless there is a 'sexual ten commandments' for marriage somewhere in the bible i missed, i really dont think many arguments stating what can and cant be done between the two really hold any water at all.
This is it. I couldn't agree more.

Love is the foundation for everything.

"When one has once fully entered the realm of love, the world — no matter how imperfect — becomes rich and beautiful, it consists solely of opportunities for love." - S. Kierkegaard.
 
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Maddog

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well for this one i see a lot of personal opinions and interpretations but not a lot of facts or proof...
Was that a yes or a no?

Just trying to ascertain what constitutes 'proof' to your mind.
 
May 6, 2011
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Was that a yes or a no?

Just trying to ascertain what constitutes 'proof' to your mind.
if oral sex is wrong i want to see it in black and white, not hear someone say i think it is because i interpreted this one verse in the bible this way. Maybe its wrong for you personally, but that doesnt make it wrong for everyone.

things that God definitely wanted people to avoid were stated pretty adamantly in scripture. notice there arent any relating to sexual activities between a husband and wife outside of the songs of solomon. and the songs support the idea of oral sex.
 
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AnandaHya

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1 Corinthians 11
13 Judge among yourselves. Is it proper for a woman to pray to God with her head uncovered? 14 Does not even nature itself teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a dishonor to him? 15 But if a woman has long hair, it is a glory to her; for her hair is given to her[a] for a covering. 16 But if anyone seems to be contentious, we have no such custom, nor do the churches of God.


in this case the "among yourselves" should be between the husband and the wife. what they do in the bedroom is a personal decision between them and I don't see why it needs to be discussed by others. its no one else's business and somethings are not established among the churches of God by the Word of God and God gives us permission to decide somethings for ourselves. Intermartial sexual relationships I believe fall under that heading as does if you want your hair long or short, you leave the decision up to your spouse for he or she is in control of your body and you are in control of theirs.

1 Corinthians 7:4
The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.


if you keep reading that passage you see it is talking about sex.
 
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karine___

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a matter of conscience. the day i found out some Christians saw no wrong with that i was surprised, i imagine what a non-Christian would think knowing we do that...wheres the purity we claim we seek ?
 
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AnandaHya

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makes me wonder why Christians are talking about their sex lives to anyone except their spouse.... perhaps because of these verses....

James 1:25-27
New King James Version (NKJV)
25 But he who looks into the perfect law of liberty and continues in it, and is not a forgetful hearer but a doer of the work, this one will be blessed in what he does.
26 If anyone among you[a] thinks he is religious, and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this one’s religion is useless. 27 Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.


sorry I'm just tired of seeing all these threads about sex in a supposed Christian forum. seriously would you talk about this stuff in Church in front of teenagers who also visit these forums?
 
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Maddog

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if oral sex is wrong i want to see it in black and white, not hear someone say i think it is because i interpreted this one verse in the bible this way.
Well, that's not going to happen because it's not there explictly even though it is (I believe) there implictly as a simple progression of reasoning from what is written explictly.

Do you have the same criterea for all questions of morals? Ie. must everything be spelled out in the Bible for you to accept it?

For my part, I believe that the Bible could disappear forever and we would still be capable of coming to a decent understanding of morality through Natural Law. The Bible certainly helps, of course, but I don't regard it as comprehensive textbook on ethics.

things that God definitely wanted people to avoid were stated pretty adamantly in scripture. notice there arent any relating to sexual activities between a husband and wife outside of the songs of solomon. and the songs support the idea of oral sex.
Well, that may be your interpretation.
 
May 6, 2011
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a matter of conscience. the day i found out some Christians saw no wrong with that i was surprised, i imagine what a non-Christian would think knowing we do that...wheres the purity we claim we seek ?
well the karine in all serious, please explain to us the pure way to have sex?

I thought keeping sex between a husband and wife in marriage was pure enough

But what is the pure way to have sex so we dont look like hypocrits to unbelievers?
 
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karine___

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yeah Ananda...keep oneself unspotted from the world , the world today is all about sex, its become a major drug to many people and has become perverted as well why would we defile its purity by bringing in the twisted ways the world created , all in the name of pleasure?
 
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karine___

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well the karine in all serious, please explain to us the pure way to have sex?

I thought keeping sex between a husband and wife in marriage was pure enough

But what is the pure way to have sex so we dont look like hypocrits to unbelievers?

the natural way
 
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Heatherlove777

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no I do not think it is a sin. it is not harmful or unhealthy.
 
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elijah2011

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The bible says what sin is, to know to right and doeth it not, to him it is sin. If you feel convicted over it and feel its wrong, it's probably sin. If you question it, or have a doubt about something the best thing is not to do it. The Holy Spirit living inside you will let you know.
 
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iraasuup

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makes me wonder why Christians are talking about their sex lives to anyone except their spouse.... perhaps because of these verses....

James 1:25-27
New King James Version (NKJV)
25 But he who looks into the perfect law of liberty and continues in it, and is not a forgetful hearer but a doer of the work, this one will be blessed in what he does.
26 If anyone among you[a] thinks he is religious, and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this one’s religion is useless. 27 Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.

sorry I'm just tired of seeing all these threads about sex in a supposed Christian forum. seriously would you talk about this stuff in Church in front of teenagers who also visit these forums?

Actually, yes I would. I applaud the churches who are bold enough to tackle the 'hot topics' head on and not 'sweep them under the carpet' as 'taboo' topics as many churches today do. I've attended many churches that have very real and candid conversations on such topics where they encourage people to 'ask those questions you've always wanted to ask, but been too afraid to ask'. I think it's better that we feel able to openly discuss these topics so we can be better informed to make our choices.

Sex is a very relevant topic - and yes *gasp* Christians have sex too- and as such have questions about it. Why is it that we feel we can't talk about it. I've always found that odd... we have no problem actually 'doing it' (for want of a better term) but we find ourselves faltering when we go to 'talk about it'...how ridiculous is that? Sex is not 'taboo' or 'evil and not to be spoken of' - it's a beautiful act of intimacy between a husband and wife.. and guess what ...GOD DESIGNED SEX *gasp - shock horror I know* He also gave us our sex drives. Why are we so tightly wound about these issues?

I agree with the last poster - these issues are a matter of personal conviction. I think, if you find yourself having to question a choice you make, or find yourself feeling unsure - then it's probably a sign that it's not a good idea to continue with that choice.
 
May 2, 2010
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there are many things we may not see wrong with , but what about what the Holy Spirit has to say to us as individuals about it? He's Holy and pure. ultimately what we have to do is stop and listen to what He has to say to us and leave some things if needed be.

Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry.

It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy Spirit.

He gave us His Holy Spirit so we can listen to Him, if we seek to know if this or that is wrong by asking a third person we may end up ignoring His voice and end up deceiving ourselves by fine-sounding arguments . i dont mean we shouldnt listen to advice but seek always to heed His voice first because He wants an intimate relationship with YOU and that most important relationship of our lives can't be replaced by anything or anyone else.
You are grossly taking this out of context... grossly. LIke others here have said anything is permissible in a marriage bed outside of adultery ... when you twist this scripture not only are you trying to manipulate people into believing your agenda you are also trying to impose some sort of control on people and say it's what God says... first off it's none of anyone's business what a wife and husband do in the bedroom , secondly sexuality in marriage doesn't make someone impure.. sounds like satan trying to defile what God gave permission for. I really don't care for your opinion and yes it's opinion and not Biblical truth so stop trying to spin it that way.