What is your greatest challenge in life right now?
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I'm just overwhelmed. My son is having trouble learning so I have to find help for him while his father tries to block my every decision. The X left us in financial ruin. I'm taking him back to court to increase child support to finally meet the state minimum requirements and reduce his visitation because he went insane and was threatening suicide in front our son. My son and I are in week two of recovering from the strep from hell. I'm behind in my bills. My job has recently changed, and I'm struggling to keep myself relevant (aka. useful) so I don't get fired. The holidays are here, and I'm still alone. I'm about to turn 33 without a date in sight. My chances to have at least one more child are diminishing daily. Society screams at me that I am fat because I'm lazy and stupid or that I just don't care enough. Message boards and forum posts tell me that none of my good qualities matter as much as my waist size.
The master toilet is leaking. I think I got rid of the mice (worthless dog). The ice broke a tree branch and left it blocking my end of the alley. My car needs repairs. I still have a barn full of stuff from before we separated 4.5 years ago: that's after 3 garage sales and 4 Salvation Army home pick ups.
There is more than enough work and worry for two people to shoulder. I am only one.
The master toilet is leaking. I think I got rid of the mice (worthless dog). The ice broke a tree branch and left it blocking my end of the alley. My car needs repairs. I still have a barn full of stuff from before we separated 4.5 years ago: that's after 3 garage sales and 4 Salvation Army home pick ups.
There is more than enough work and worry for two people to shoulder. I am only one.
J
Father, be with all of us in this thread. Give us Your peace, wisdom, comfort and guidance. Help us all to learn quickly what it is You would have us see, and help us not to forget so that we don't have to learn it again.
We trust in Your unfailing love and provision. We have what we need, even if we don't have what we want. Help us to know the difference.
Help us to build everything upon the Cornerstone. Help us to relinquish those things that hinder our walk with You.
Please direct our vision and thought life, and help us to become less that You might become more in and through us.
We trust in Your unfailing love and provision. We have what we need, even if we don't have what we want. Help us to know the difference.
Help us to build everything upon the Cornerstone. Help us to relinquish those things that hinder our walk with You.
Please direct our vision and thought life, and help us to become less that You might become more in and through us.
I've been depressed a little bit lately.
When I think about who I was just 5 years ago, to who I am now, a lot has changed.
I feel like I'm so far behind the curve of how I'm supposed to feel or what I'm supposed to be doing, that to get where I need to be seems like a lifetime away. Its like I'm in the wilderness between the fertile ground where I used to live, and the unknown place where I'm going.
I don't feel ambitious anymore. I used to want to conquer the world, but now I'm okay with just going to school like a good little student. I used to want to find love, but I'm okay with just me. I've seen the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, and lets just say I'm in no hurry to get there.
I think about people who have bought houses and have nice cars and wives and children. And for so long I used to despise the idea of seeing myself settling down into all of that. I wanted to fall in love and run away with someone, not become a traditional drone who who goes through the motions of celebrating birthdays and holidays as highlights of an otherwise uninspired and underwhelming life. For so long I surrounded myself with people who believed and lived the same way that I did. Now they are off, married galavanting, some even with children in tow. Some of my people are jealous of this, I used to be, but now, I feel like its a life that is impossible to imagine for me anymore.
But unfortunately I've learned that the Love I seek is only for the young. When I was younger, I was in love. It did all the things. It was freeing, it was belonging, it crossed all the lines and broke all the rules. But as I've gotten older it's all slipped away. The obligations of family, responsibility, adulthood, which I would have been more than happy to face with someone I loved, I do alone. The age of growing up with a love that lasts is over.
The stuff of what it would take to get there again, is so far from where I am now. The expectations have changed too. The women I've dated have gotten older and with that comes the biological clock stuff. More and more it becomes less about love and more about children and family and home. Try to fit the mold of a family man for me is like starting from scratch and letting go of everything that has defined me. Its abandoning my identity and my principles and my dreams to accommodate a lifestyle that I'm not used to, all for the sake of being able to be loved. I've begun a process to trade in chasing the love that I've known and expected, for the mantle of duty, with the hope that someday I can learn to enjoy life how other people do it.
I simply have to face the reality that the vast majority of women want children and all the bells and whistles that go along with that. I've always wanted to grow together with someone, to explore, to spend years discovering who we are together and build a foundation that could tackle anything, then deciding together what we were going to do. If we wanted we could start a business, have children, or find a nice beach in south America to grow old together. The world was in front of us.
I took for granted the relationships and the women who shared that dream with me. I thought women like that would always be around. It was all I knew. It was what I grew up with. Marriage meant being a missionary, sailor, journalist, world relief employee, peace corps volunteer, etc but just not having to do it alone. Don't get me wrong, I've done it alone so far but, it would have been much cooler if I didn't have to choose between doing me and being alone.
Now All I know is that I need to buy a house, get a good job that makes lots of money, buy a big fat car/minivan/suv that way I would make good "husband material" on the meat market of life. So I go to school, eventually I'll have a 9-5 job and a house and an SUV. And with that mortgage payment, the debt and the obligation, I will know that my spirit has been crushed but, at least I won't be alone. Until she divorces me and takes all of it away, along with the kids. But I hear its worth it, must be, because everyone else is doing it.
TL
R My greatest challenge is transitioning from Young Optimistic me to Crotchety Pragmatist me.
When I think about who I was just 5 years ago, to who I am now, a lot has changed.
I feel like I'm so far behind the curve of how I'm supposed to feel or what I'm supposed to be doing, that to get where I need to be seems like a lifetime away. Its like I'm in the wilderness between the fertile ground where I used to live, and the unknown place where I'm going.
I don't feel ambitious anymore. I used to want to conquer the world, but now I'm okay with just going to school like a good little student. I used to want to find love, but I'm okay with just me. I've seen the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, and lets just say I'm in no hurry to get there.
I think about people who have bought houses and have nice cars and wives and children. And for so long I used to despise the idea of seeing myself settling down into all of that. I wanted to fall in love and run away with someone, not become a traditional drone who who goes through the motions of celebrating birthdays and holidays as highlights of an otherwise uninspired and underwhelming life. For so long I surrounded myself with people who believed and lived the same way that I did. Now they are off, married galavanting, some even with children in tow. Some of my people are jealous of this, I used to be, but now, I feel like its a life that is impossible to imagine for me anymore.
But unfortunately I've learned that the Love I seek is only for the young. When I was younger, I was in love. It did all the things. It was freeing, it was belonging, it crossed all the lines and broke all the rules. But as I've gotten older it's all slipped away. The obligations of family, responsibility, adulthood, which I would have been more than happy to face with someone I loved, I do alone. The age of growing up with a love that lasts is over.
The stuff of what it would take to get there again, is so far from where I am now. The expectations have changed too. The women I've dated have gotten older and with that comes the biological clock stuff. More and more it becomes less about love and more about children and family and home. Try to fit the mold of a family man for me is like starting from scratch and letting go of everything that has defined me. Its abandoning my identity and my principles and my dreams to accommodate a lifestyle that I'm not used to, all for the sake of being able to be loved. I've begun a process to trade in chasing the love that I've known and expected, for the mantle of duty, with the hope that someday I can learn to enjoy life how other people do it.
I simply have to face the reality that the vast majority of women want children and all the bells and whistles that go along with that. I've always wanted to grow together with someone, to explore, to spend years discovering who we are together and build a foundation that could tackle anything, then deciding together what we were going to do. If we wanted we could start a business, have children, or find a nice beach in south America to grow old together. The world was in front of us.
I took for granted the relationships and the women who shared that dream with me. I thought women like that would always be around. It was all I knew. It was what I grew up with. Marriage meant being a missionary, sailor, journalist, world relief employee, peace corps volunteer, etc but just not having to do it alone. Don't get me wrong, I've done it alone so far but, it would have been much cooler if I didn't have to choose between doing me and being alone.
Now All I know is that I need to buy a house, get a good job that makes lots of money, buy a big fat car/minivan/suv that way I would make good "husband material" on the meat market of life. So I go to school, eventually I'll have a 9-5 job and a house and an SUV. And with that mortgage payment, the debt and the obligation, I will know that my spirit has been crushed but, at least I won't be alone. Until she divorces me and takes all of it away, along with the kids. But I hear its worth it, must be, because everyone else is doing it.
TL
R My greatest challenge is transitioning from Young Optimistic me to Crotchety Pragmatist me.
I
Not to get off topic..but ty all who have shared your hearts. I don't want to say that "misery loves company" but in a strange sense it's comforting to know that you are not alone in how you feel,that so many other's have such real & deep things they are dealing with as well. We're all a mess w/out God...and even with Him we seemingly appear to be at times,but in the end He is faithful,even when we are not. Everyone who has posted here I will keep in prayer,that the Lord may guide each & every one of you out of the confusion or hopelessness we feel we're in at the moment. We all need one another...and more importantly we all need Christ.
Much love to all of you & thank you for being who you are.
Much love to all of you & thank you for being who you are.
M
I've felt for the last couple of months that my whole life is one big challenge to overcome. I don't normally feel that way...I'm usually a pretty positive, happy person. But I've had to look some really hard truths right in the eye lately, had to stop pretending things were just all unicorns and rainbows (or judgmental deer and spray paint). I'm having to figure out what the next steps will be, try to find a way to make a move without inflicting too much pain to anyone else.
I'll probably be back in this thread in a couple of months with a whole different set of struggles.
I'll probably be back in this thread in a couple of months with a whole different set of struggles.
Where do I start? there are so many.....
1. Myself. Fighting not to conform to liberal christianity.
2. My state denominational board, who makes demands without helping. They've forgotten their servant-of-all calling.
3. Dealing with spiritually blind people who think they're saved & can see.
4. Watching the Great Falling Away happen right before my eyes. I think I can understand Jeremiah's heart a little better now. He was known as the weeping prophet.
And that's just the big ones........
1. Myself. Fighting not to conform to liberal christianity.
2. My state denominational board, who makes demands without helping. They've forgotten their servant-of-all calling.
3. Dealing with spiritually blind people who think they're saved & can see.
4. Watching the Great Falling Away happen right before my eyes. I think I can understand Jeremiah's heart a little better now. He was known as the weeping prophet.
And that's just the big ones........
K
well....oops. Sorry but I screwed up. Here's my post in entirety:
My greatest challenge is reading through this thread without cutting my own throat. I don't mean to be disrespectful or glib but it's soo sad! You're all people I've connected to in some way or other so I feel like I know you all but more importantly, I KNOW WHAT YOU CAN DO!!!! Misty 77 - I know what you can do - you are so smart, so capable - you defend yourself and women-kind with a ferociousness that's fascinating and intimidating at the same time. ITore - I know what you can do. Your ability to see the brightness of any character; to see humor in the tragedy of human life? Do you know the value of that? Rainin - are you aware of the value of your straightforward logic? Pipp and MySavior introspectively said your own selves were the challenge? I know what you two can do!
Here is my frustration. God manifests Himself in us. When He comes into our lives He brings all His guns - He enhances our talents. He enhances our minds. You think you loved before God came into your life? How do you love now? He enhances our love. All those things you have, those passions, those talents, your mind, your body, your heart - those things are better because of God. My frustration is that we sit at this banquet of gifts with our knife in one hand and a fork in the other and don't touch any of it! We don't consume it! It goes wasted because it spoils over time when it's not used for the betterment of us. Why is the betterment of us important? It makes our testimony more solid. It allows people to see the grandeur of God through us. What good am I when ice falls trees on my fence if I moan of the weather? He's given me a strong body. I rarely get sick. I have a chainsaw. What testimony is that if the words from my heart shared to others was that God allowed this storm to happen and that He must have had His reason? The message is really God has given me all these things to help me SURVIVE this storm.
I was so moved by a video of a young woman who was dying of cancer I saw on Godvine. She was brave the way she faced that cold wind. But the remarkable part of her testimony - the part that gave me the most strength, the most inspiration - was when she said that God did not give her cancer. Cancer was here in this lost world because of our sin and she just caught it. God gave her a way to survive, though, through everlasting life. God gives us everything we need - everything and even more. Nothing is lacking. If we don't consume it, we will die of hunger in a field of plenty.
My greatest challenge is reading through this thread without cutting my own throat. I don't mean to be disrespectful or glib but it's soo sad! You're all people I've connected to in some way or other so I feel like I know you all but more importantly, I KNOW WHAT YOU CAN DO!!!! Misty 77 - I know what you can do - you are so smart, so capable - you defend yourself and women-kind with a ferociousness that's fascinating and intimidating at the same time. ITore - I know what you can do. Your ability to see the brightness of any character; to see humor in the tragedy of human life? Do you know the value of that? Rainin - are you aware of the value of your straightforward logic? Pipp and MySavior introspectively said your own selves were the challenge? I know what you two can do!
Here is my frustration. God manifests Himself in us. When He comes into our lives He brings all His guns - He enhances our talents. He enhances our minds. You think you loved before God came into your life? How do you love now? He enhances our love. All those things you have, those passions, those talents, your mind, your body, your heart - those things are better because of God. My frustration is that we sit at this banquet of gifts with our knife in one hand and a fork in the other and don't touch any of it! We don't consume it! It goes wasted because it spoils over time when it's not used for the betterment of us. Why is the betterment of us important? It makes our testimony more solid. It allows people to see the grandeur of God through us. What good am I when ice falls trees on my fence if I moan of the weather? He's given me a strong body. I rarely get sick. I have a chainsaw. What testimony is that if the words from my heart shared to others was that God allowed this storm to happen and that He must have had His reason? The message is really God has given me all these things to help me SURVIVE this storm.
I was so moved by a video of a young woman who was dying of cancer I saw on Godvine. She was brave the way she faced that cold wind. But the remarkable part of her testimony - the part that gave me the most strength, the most inspiration - was when she said that God did not give her cancer. Cancer was here in this lost world because of our sin and she just caught it. God gave her a way to survive, though, through everlasting life. God gives us everything we need - everything and even more. Nothing is lacking. If we don't consume it, we will die of hunger in a field of plenty.
TLR My greatest challenge is transitioning from Young Optimistic me to Crotchety Pragmatist me.
R My greatest challenge is transitioning from Young Optimistic me to Crotchety Pragmatist me.
However, don't sink too far into that new role of yours, because as soon as you are settled, some adventure-loving free-spirited woman is going to come along. And if you do happen to marry and have a handful of kids, I think you'll find yourself on more of an adventure than you ever imagined. If you think seeing the would through your own eyes is exciting, just imagine seeing it through the fascinated and excited eyes of a child. (Just a little bit of optimism for you there Liam!)
Kenthomas... you, my friend, are very wise.
iTore, Cris, and others... I've not been here long, but I've come to care quite deeply for you. Wish I could do something tangible to help, but I wanted to let you know that I'm thinking about you throughout the day, and praying. (((HUGS)))
I would encourage you to read the book of Daniel and meditate on it. Daniel and his friends were taken captive by a king that's entire goal was to stuff the world into them however they remained unchanged and stood firm and God delivered them again and again. If you had the money, Dr David Jeremiah did a study on Daniel called "The writing on the wall" It would REALLY help you, God really used it to help me when I was struggling with the same type of war within my mind. Also Joyce Myer "battle field of the mind" would help you, you can look it up on youtube. I'll pray for you.
Liamson, marriage is designed to be a reflection of Gods love for His church and our relationship with Him. Seek God in this area of your life...If marriage is designed to be a reflection of God's relationship with us how can we seek a spouse without God?
If you want a godly women, she will marry YOU not your house, car and money. She will love you and submit herself to you as unto God. Do not even speak that the person you will marry will leave you and take the kids. Not even jokingly because our words have power. God spoke the world into existence, and we are made in His image do you think that our words do not have power? Reflect on the meditations of your heart because our words are a manifestation of what is in our heart. Also what we believe affects what we will do and how we will act. If you start on the grounds of defeat and sinking sand then don't expect to build a firm foundation. We must start by building upon the rock. Don't lower your expectations but instead turn to God and ask Him to give wings to your dreams. God wants to do above and beyond your expectations or what you can imagine, He is exceedingly good and He is your portion. But more than anything the greatest thing is to know God, seek God and He will give you the desires of your heart.
I know the feeling of years going by and being two steps behind and losing ambition but you know what God is a fire and He will ignite our hearts. If we seek Him, he will set our heart ablaze...I feel like you should invest in "Heart Ablaze-John Bevere" There is a book and also sermons on dvds. I only saw part of the sermons on dvds and God really spoke to me through it and sparked something in me...(that was a year ago now) and I was just reminded of it now for you. So please look it up. Also God is our hope, apart from Him everything becomes meaningless. Solomon discovered that, everything is meaningless under the sun (apart from God) it becomes a chasing after the wind.
I will start praying for you, don't be discouraged and don't settle for a mundane life when God has so much more for you!!!!!!!! Seek God![SUP] "[/SUP]For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11
If you want a godly women, she will marry YOU not your house, car and money. She will love you and submit herself to you as unto God. Do not even speak that the person you will marry will leave you and take the kids. Not even jokingly because our words have power. God spoke the world into existence, and we are made in His image do you think that our words do not have power? Reflect on the meditations of your heart because our words are a manifestation of what is in our heart. Also what we believe affects what we will do and how we will act. If you start on the grounds of defeat and sinking sand then don't expect to build a firm foundation. We must start by building upon the rock. Don't lower your expectations but instead turn to God and ask Him to give wings to your dreams. God wants to do above and beyond your expectations or what you can imagine, He is exceedingly good and He is your portion. But more than anything the greatest thing is to know God, seek God and He will give you the desires of your heart.
I know the feeling of years going by and being two steps behind and losing ambition but you know what God is a fire and He will ignite our hearts. If we seek Him, he will set our heart ablaze...I feel like you should invest in "Heart Ablaze-John Bevere" There is a book and also sermons on dvds. I only saw part of the sermons on dvds and God really spoke to me through it and sparked something in me...(that was a year ago now) and I was just reminded of it now for you. So please look it up. Also God is our hope, apart from Him everything becomes meaningless. Solomon discovered that, everything is meaningless under the sun (apart from God) it becomes a chasing after the wind.
I will start praying for you, don't be discouraged and don't settle for a mundane life when God has so much more for you!!!!!!!! Seek God!
[SUP] "[/SUP]For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11
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S
I took for granted the relationships and the women who shared that dream with me. I thought women like that would always be around. It was all I knew. It was what I grew up with. Marriage meant being a missionary, sailor, journalist, world relief employee, peace corps volunteer, etc but just not having to do it alone. Don't get me wrong, I've done it alone so far but, it would have been much cooler if I didn't have to choose between doing me and being alone.
Now All I know is that I need to buy a house, get a good job that makes lots of money, buy a big fat car/minivan/suv that way I would make good "husband material" on the meat market of life. So I go to school, eventually I'll have a 9-5 job and a house and an SUV. And with that mortgage payment, the debt and the obligation, I will know that my spirit has been crushed but, at least I won't be alone. Until she divorces me and takes all of it away, along with the kids. But I hear its worth it, must be, because everyone else is doing it.
TLR My greatest challenge is transitioning from Young Optimistic me to Crotchety Pragmatist me.
Now All I know is that I need to buy a house, get a good job that makes lots of money, buy a big fat car/minivan/suv that way I would make good "husband material" on the meat market of life. So I go to school, eventually I'll have a 9-5 job and a house and an SUV. And with that mortgage payment, the debt and the obligation, I will know that my spirit has been crushed but, at least I won't be alone. Until she divorces me and takes all of it away, along with the kids. But I hear its worth it, must be, because everyone else is doing it.
TL
R My greatest challenge is transitioning from Young Optimistic me to Crotchety Pragmatist me.
Find that one in a thousand who wants to be a missionary, or an adventurer. If it takes you the rest of your life to do it, find that person. Never settle brother. Never settle. It always ends up with two unhappy people.
God has given me the revelation that the biggest problems are not actually the problems themselves in our life. The biggest battles actually take place inside our mind and our heart.
Think of the battle with Goliath for example...the men were shaking in their armour and they couldn't not overcome Goliath yet a young man, still considered a boy was able to defeat him. Why is that? What was the real problem? The problem was that they saw Goliath compared to themselves but the boy (david) saw the giant compared to God.
If we saw our problems compared to God and had a true revelation that God is with us then we would understand that we are more than overcomers and that the battle belongs to the Lord, the battle is already won and God has already given us victory. God has given us authority to trample over snakes (demonic) and scorpion's (sin)! We have victory in Christ Jesus, why are we walking around defeated?
"Where sin runs deep, Your grace is more
Where grace is found is where You are
And where You are Lord I am free
Holiness is Christ in me
Yes where You are Lord I am free
Holiness is Christ in me"
-Lord, I need you (song)
There's lots of "problems" in my life, broken family, relationship/marriage problems, on and on the list goes....
but the greatest problem is learning to put my trust in God. Its easy to believe in God, even demons believe in God and shudder but the hard part is putting our trust in God. All godly men and women put their trust in God, all those who stood firm to the test and who were over comers put their trust in God. Sometimes its hard to see the good (God-God is good) in life when everything seems so bad but I'm learning to see God during the trials. Sometimes it takes being thrown into the fire to find the forth man in there to realise that God is with you all along. (referring to the book of Daniel)
Think of the battle with Goliath for example...the men were shaking in their armour and they couldn't not overcome Goliath yet a young man, still considered a boy was able to defeat him. Why is that? What was the real problem? The problem was that they saw Goliath compared to themselves but the boy (david) saw the giant compared to God.
If we saw our problems compared to God and had a true revelation that God is with us then we would understand that we are more than overcomers and that the battle belongs to the Lord, the battle is already won and God has already given us victory. God has given us authority to trample over snakes (demonic) and scorpion's (sin)! We have victory in Christ Jesus, why are we walking around defeated?
"Where sin runs deep, Your grace is more
Where grace is found is where You are
And where You are Lord I am free
Holiness is Christ in me
Yes where You are Lord I am free
Holiness is Christ in me"
-Lord, I need you (song)
There's lots of "problems" in my life, broken family, relationship/marriage problems, on and on the list goes....
but the greatest problem is learning to put my trust in God. Its easy to believe in God, even demons believe in God and shudder but the hard part is putting our trust in God. All godly men and women put their trust in God, all those who stood firm to the test and who were over comers put their trust in God. Sometimes its hard to see the good (God-God is good) in life when everything seems so bad but I'm learning to see God during the trials. Sometimes it takes being thrown into the fire to find the forth man in there to realise that God is with you all along. (referring to the book of Daniel)