What's are the "don'ts" of a first date?

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Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
3,645
2,865
113
#61
Scrap all this stuff. Be yourself, good or bad. Because eventually it'll come out on it's own. So if you are planning ahead on how to act/talk that's fake and selfish.
 

Mii

Well-known member
Mar 23, 2019
2,058
1,320
113
#62
Scrap all this stuff. Be yourself, good or bad. Because eventually it'll come out on it's own. So if you are planning ahead on how to act/talk that's fake and selfish.
Idk, having a plan is not a bad thing. Not had really any experience with dates...is it not something of an interview?
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
3,645
2,865
113
#63
Idk, having a plan is not a bad thing. Not had really any experience with dates...is it not something of an interview?
I don't go on dates, either. Never have. I always thought the traditional date concept was silly. But if one is going to go on one and plan out the 'right' answers and behaviors, is that not dishonest? If you're still stuck on an ex and babbling about them all the time, is it really honest to hide that from someone trying to get to know you?
If you make a plan of what to say and not to say is it honest to pretend to be those things, when it's not really who you are? I don't want to waste my time with someone putting on a show, i want to get to know a real person. That's one reason i never went on dates. Making friends and transitioning that into a relationship without all the fronting and peacocking is much more preferable.
 

kinda

Senior Member
Jun 26, 2013
3,634
1,426
113
#64
I don't go on dates, either. Never have. I always thought the traditional date concept was silly. But if one is going to go on one and plan out the 'right' answers and behaviors, is that not dishonest? If you're still stuck on an ex and babbling about them all the time, is it really honest to hide that from someone trying to get to know you?
If you make a plan of what to say and not to say is it honest to pretend to be those things, when it's not really who you are? I don't want to waste my time with someone putting on a show, i want to get to know a real person. That's one reason i never went on dates. Making friends and transitioning that into a relationship without all the fronting and peacocking is much more preferable.
1563309138938.jpeg
 
Feb 2, 2019
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Liverpool
#65
Don't bring up past relationships, especially for no necessary reason! If the first thing a woman tells me on a first date is about another man she was romantically interested in, at best it shows she's still thinking about that person, even if only to tell a joke. At the worst, it tells me they're still hung up on that person, and I'd be little other than an attempt to fill the hole that other person left. And I will admit for myself at least, it can also make you jealous further on in the relationship, so maybe it's just a general rule throughout!


Maybe I'm just an easily jealous person aha, that's pretty likely too
 

Ellorah

Well-known member
Jan 28, 2019
436
678
93
30
South Carolina
#66
Don’t blow your nose at the table.
Do pay for the meal unless this was discussed beforehand
Do smile and listen intently
Do be kind to the wait staff 👍
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
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#71
Above all, don't act like this date is your last hope of salvation from the interminable boredom of being lonely. Don't act like you have no idea what you will do with your life if this date fails. You'll come off as really, really needy, and your date will go away.
 

Deade

Called of God
Dec 17, 2017
16,724
10,529
113
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Vinita, Oklahoma, USA
yeshuaofisrael.org
#72
Above all, don't act like this date is your last hope of salvation from the interminable boredom of being lonely. Don't act like you have no idea what you will do with your life if this date fails. You'll come off as really, really needy, and your date will go away.
Yeah, I can see that would make you look a little "clingy." Hahaha...

flashing-lol.gif
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,327
2,359
113
#73
Above all, don't act like this date is your last hope of salvation from the interminable boredom of being lonely. Don't act like you have no idea what you will do with your life if this date fails. You'll come off as really, really needy, and your date will go away.
That's right. This is the stuff you're supposed to save for the second date :p
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,173
113
#79
Dont forget the date. Put it down in your diary.

Dont make the date months in advance and then keep reminding the person every day they are going to have a date.

Keep all dates for Friday nights. If you keep asking on Tuesdays, she'll know its a cheap date, cos there is nothing good to do on Tuesdays.