Where are all the real Christian men??

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ChristianTonyB

Well-known member
Jan 27, 2022
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Tin Can Bay
Judas was both a disciple (Greek: "mathētēs") and an apostle (Greek: "apostolos").

Matthew chapter 10

[1] And when he had called unto him his twelve disciples, he gave them power against unclean spirits, to cast them out, and to heal all manner of sickness and all manner of disease.
[2] Now the names of the twelve apostles are these; The first, Simon, who is called Peter, and Andrew his brother; James the son of Zebedee, and John his brother;
[3] Philip, and Bartholomew; Thomas, and Matthew the publican; James the son of Alphaeus, and Lebbaeus, whose surname was Thaddaeus;
[4] Simon the Canaanite, and Judas Iscariot, who also betrayed him.

In fact, Matthias was chosen to replace Judas' apostleship.

Acts chapter 1

[15] And in those days Peter stood up in the midst of the disciples, and said, (the number of names together were about an hundred and twenty,)
[16] Men and brethren, this scripture must needs have been fulfilled, which the Holy Ghost by the mouth of David spake before concerning Judas, which was guide to them that took Jesus.
[17] For he was numbered with us, and had obtained part of this ministry.
[18] Now this man purchased a field with the reward of iniquity; and falling headlong, he burst asunder in the midst, and all his bowels gushed out.
[19] And it was known unto all the dwellers at Jerusalem; insomuch as that field is called in their proper tongue, Aceldama, that is to say, The field of blood.
[20] For it is written in the book of Psalms, Let his habitation be desolate, and let no man dwell therein: and his bishoprick let another take.
[21] Wherefore of these men which have companied with us all the time that the Lord Jesus went in and out among us,
[22] Beginning from the baptism of John, unto that same day that he was taken up from us, must one be ordained to be a witness with us of his resurrection.
[23] And they appointed two, Joseph called Barsabas, who was surnamed Justus, and Matthias.
[24] And they prayed, and said, Thou, Lord, which knowest the hearts of all men, shew whether of these two thou hast chosen,
[25] That he may take part of this ministry and apostleship, from which Judas by transgression fell, that he might go to his own place.
[26] And they gave forth their lots; and the lot fell upon Matthias; and he was numbered with the eleven apostles.

Just for the record.
Thank you for checking my comment.

Yes, quite right, I stand corrected. I remembered he had been counted as one of the 12 disciples, but had forgotten that Matthew referred to Him as being an apostle. I think I struggled in my mind to believe that Judas, a practising thief, would have actually carried out the work of an apostle.

Thank you for your response.
 

Hazelelponi

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2019
450
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USA
Hi! I’m in my 30’s and divorced. I’m just wondering why I can’t find any true honest loyal Christian men my age?! Are there any out there or all they all into this new age junk?!
My son is not Christian so know I'm only using him as an example.

My son's age is 37. He is single/never married because he has/had specific requirements in a wife.

She must be a devoted wife, monogamous, born in the US, not a religious fanatic just normal (faith is fine but not overboard with it), she must keep house, cook, but can work and have a career so long as it's not an interference with household duties, but she can also choose to stay home (he offers full financial support)

He wanted children, he would have made such a wonderful father.. he's family oriented and sees a more traditional role for a wife.

These are the things a man his age couldn't find. They are no longer normal American female qualities.

He almost got married to a divorcee once (prior marriage wasn't a put off for him) who had two children he was absolutely devoted to.

She cheated on him and ended up pregnant with another man's child (there was never a possibility for it being his) and blamed him for not being attentive enough to her, and wanted him to apologize, marry her anyway, and also raise this other man's child.

He was so heart broken... But at least he found out what she was about prior to the actual marriage.

And that was honestly the best option he ever found.

Men in the west are swearing off women, because women have sworn off anything that makes them attractive as wives..

My stepson was lucky in that he found a nice Christian girl from a solid Christian family in high school and they married at 18 with the help of family. They have a wonderful marriage, 3 beautiful children now and I don't at this point see them ever divorcing. Truly their marriage was a gift from God.

I would examine what kind of wife you'd make, and learn a little bit on how to get word out that you're seeking marriage.

My son would never allow me to arrange a marriage for him, but meeting people through those you know is how you best meet the right kind of person for you. Befriending the local gossip could run in your favor.
 

Amanuensis

Well-known member
Jun 12, 2021
1,308
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Well, I agree with that, but you've gone too far the other way. If you're not willing or able to adjudge whether or not someone in your group is eligible for marriage or not, you shouldn't be in the position of providing oversight and care for them.
In real life most people don't ask my permission about such things. And I don't go about soliciting uninvited advice about people's personal lives.

Most people won't care about my opinion on such things unless they get close enough to know me and feel that I genuinely care about them. This would require being part of the local fellowship where we can get to know each other by living life together over time. After they know that I love them and live what I preach will they respect what I say about what the scriptures teach.

People can get good scripture teachings from a Google search. But before people are willing to take advice about their personal lives, they want to know 1) Do you really love them and are willing to find out about their family and all of its problems without judging them, and 2) Do you live what you preach. That takes time. Therefore.... Local fellowship.

When that bond is established and they know you won't gossip about them, then they will ask, and we will pray about their situation and find the best solution according to the scriptures and the will of God. Until then, everyone should just shut up about their unsolicited opinions on that persons eligibility for marriage. That is my approach. And I think I have the Spirit of the Lord.
 

Hazelelponi

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2019
450
296
63
USA
In real life most people don't ask my permission about such things. And I don't go about soliciting uninvited advice about people's personal lives.

Most people won't care about my opinion on such things unless they get close enough to know me and feel that I genuinely care about them. This would require being part of the local fellowship where we can get to know each other by living life together over time. After they know that I love them and live what I preach will they respect what I say about what the scriptures teach.

People can get good scripture teachings from a Google search. But before people are willing to take advice about their personal lives, they want to know 1) Do you really love them and are willing to find out about their family and all of its problems without judging them, and 2) Do you live what you preach. That takes time. Therefore.... Local fellowship.

When that bond is established and they know you won't gossip about them, then they will ask, and we will pray about their situation and find the best solution according to the scriptures and the will of God. Until then, everyone should just shut up about their unsolicited opinions on that persons eligibility for marriage. That is my approach. And I think I have the Spirit of the Lord.
I've read the last couple posts of yours in this thread and they're very good...

It's seems a positive way to handle people who are divorced.

I am divorced and have since remarried (although I divorced prior to being saved) and know my current marriage is absolutely blessed by God.

Everyone has a story.
 
J

JAPOV

Guest
Well, I could not in all conscience recommend anyone join your church then, they'd be walking into a snake pit IMO.
Tony, perhaps you would benefit from a character study of men/women in the Bible... None of them were perfect.

As a child I didn't particularly enjoy church... Then my Dad told me, "Maye it's not about what you get from church, but what you bring to it."

I find it interesting that the first pages of Revelation are about God's judgment upon the Churches :cool:
 

shittim

Senior Member
Dec 16, 2016
10,533
5,729
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Tony, perhaps you would benefit from a character study of men/women in the Bible... None of them were perfect.

As a child I didn't particularly enjoy church... Then my Dad told me, "Maye it's not about what you get from church, but what you bring to it."

I find it interesting that the first pages of Revelation are about God's judgment upon the Churches :cool:

After all, the Son of Man whom we should all be emmulating, came not to be served, but to serve, and gave his life, a ransom for many.
 

Runningman

Well-known member
Mar 4, 2020
5,950
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Hi! I’m in my 30’s and divorced. I’m just wondering why I can’t find any true honest loyal Christian men my age?! Are there any out there or all they all into this new age junk?!
Would you date a "real Christian man" in his mid 30's who was a devout man of God, but lived at home in his mother's basement, was not successful, not good looking, not very intelligent, and had no real life goals? However, his faith was unbreakable, he knew the Bible well, talked the talk, walked the walk, and was sincerely born again.
 

JesusFreak1992

Queen of Hearts
Apr 26, 2022
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Kansas City
Would you date a "real Christian man" in his mid 30's who was a devout man of God, but lived at home in his mother's basement, was not successful, not good looking, not very intelligent, and had no real life goals? However, his faith was unbreakable, he knew the Bible well, talked the talk, walked the walk, and was sincerely born again.
I can't say yes or no because I have never met someone like that. I wouldn't know if I would want to date him because I've never talked to him.
 
J

JAPOV

Guest
I am being honest. But I have alot of medical issues and need help taking care of myself so Idk if that would work because I might eventually need someone to support me
Perfectly reasonable and natural response!
 
Jan 12, 2022
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No man that is a Christian may marry a divorced woman for it is adultery, and he bring a curse from God upon himself and not a blessing. Reconcile to your husband if it is still possible and you will get a blessing from God and not a curse.
 

JesusFreak1992

Queen of Hearts
Apr 26, 2022
216
96
28
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Kansas City
No man that is a Christian may marry a divorced woman for it is adultery, and he bring a curse from God upon himself and not a blessing. Reconcile to your husband if it is still possible and you will get a blessing from God and not a curse.
I would never reconcile with him as he was a terrible (to me) husband and hurt me in many ways. I am happier without him. And I think that God forgives every sin, if it is a sin to remarry.
 

stilllearning

Active member
Oct 4, 2021
347
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I can't say yes or no because I have never met someone like that. I wouldn't know if I would want to date him because I've never talked to him.
You may have already. Which I have no clue because I don't know you. I will take you at your word though and will agree that you have not.

I only say may have for all of us actually. When we read how Peter said Lot was a righteous man but was vexed. I never really saw him as all that righteous but the Spirit said it was so, therefore I must conclude it is so. However, he was vexed the world had warped his thinking cause to offer your daughters is warped.

The world has basic wisdom that it operates in that is fitting for a system that will be undone and laid waste. One of those basic things when it comes to men and women it says to men get the prettiest girl you can afford and to women it says find the best looking man who can afford you.

So I believe as Christians even today we are vexed and oft have the influence of the world present in our decision making. So I say we may have already found the person we want but in our foolishness moved them to the friend zone where we have not taking a second look at them.

Many times we already know the type of person we want but are still looking for them because we still have the influence of the world on us because we are on a constant basis vexed by the world. Why our God in his wisdom said to renew our minds because he has known of the influence that vexation can have and set forth Lot as a example unto us. Given as a example and a measuring stick to ask how is the world influencing me so I can let that area of my mind be renewed.

So I take you at your word and you have seen no such person. Just using your post as a launching point to make a bigger point to all of who may be searching. A question to ask of ourselves has God already brought a person into my life and I have overlooked them because the worlds wisdom is being used as the standard to meet.
 
Jan 12, 2022
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I would never reconcile with him as he was a terrible (to me) husband and hurt me in many ways. I am happier without him. And I think that God forgives every sin, if it is a sin to remarry.
Why should God forgive you if you cannot forgive and reconcile your real husband? God cannot be manipulated, he will send the Four Sore Judgements on this society for doing these things, he has already sent two of the four upon this society. Will they even provoke the Lord God just like the generation of Zedekiah and get the Sword sent upon them?

EDIT: It does not have to be this way. The society does not have to be so greatly cursed, only acknowledge that their ways and beliefs and actions were wrong and incredibly evil and acknowledge the Lord God has judged with might and power, and the Lord God be merciful. Do what God says is right and be blessed. Is it not better to be blessed than it is to be cursed?
 
J

JAPOV

Guest
No man that is a Christian may marry a divorced woman for it is adultery, and he bring a curse from God upon himself and not a blessing. Reconcile to your husband if it is still possible and you will get a blessing from God and not a curse.
Lol... I was aware of this when I met my Ex wife. She swore to me that her ex husband was adulterous and abusive and I believed her. I prayed and committed to our marriage 100%! Then I met her ex husband and it all went to crap! In hindsight I suppose, instead of praying, I should have just walked away....
 

JesusFreak1992

Queen of Hearts
Apr 26, 2022
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96
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Kansas City
Why should God forgive you if you cannot forgive and reconcile your real husband? God cannot be manipulated, he will send the Four Sore Judgements on this society for doing these things, he has already sent two of the four upon this society. Will they even provoke the Lord God just like the generation of Zedekiah and get the Sword sent upon them?

EDIT: It does not have to be this way. The society does not have to be so greatly cursed, only acknowledge that their ways and beliefs and actions were wrong and incredibly evil and acknowledge the Lord God has judged with might and power, and the Lord God be merciful. Do what God says is right and be blessed. Is it not better to be blessed than it is to be cursed?
Who said I haven't forgiven him? I didn't. I have forgiven him I just refuse to let him baack into my life. He and I had a very toxic relationship.
 
Jan 12, 2022
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Who said I haven't forgiven him? I didn't. I have forgiven him I just refuse to let him baack into my life. He and I had a very toxic relationship.
If that is at all the truth, then the next best thing is you must bear the consequences of your evil actions you may not remarry you must return to your father's home, and do not add more errors to your error by committing adultery and fornication. No Christian man will be deceived by this because our King, Lord Jesus, told us not to do these things, and if we truly believe in him; how can we openly defy him? The answer is we cannot lest we bring on to ourselves a powerful curse and not a blessing.
 
J

JAPOV

Guest
Here's another "odd" thought to consider....

I've only been married once and I was faithful to my wife. I considered my marriage a kind of repentance because, as a younger man, I was no saint.

Now, I also consider my divorce "a kind of repentance"... Go figure.
 

JesusFreak1992

Queen of Hearts
Apr 26, 2022
216
96
28
29
Kansas City
If that is at all the truth, then the next best thing is you must bear the consequences of your evil actions you may not remarry you must return to your father's home, and do not add more errors to your error by committing adultery and fornication. No Christian man will be deceived by this because our King, Lord Jesus, told us not to do these things, and if we truly believe in him; how can we openly defy him? The answer is we cannot lest we bring on to ourselves a powerful curse and not a blessing.
I'm sorry but are you God? Do you know everything? I cannot believe you said my divorce was an evil action. I was ABUSED. How is leaving my abuser an evil action. I'm done fighting with you.