Will God Provide you with a Spouse?

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AAAPlus

AAAPlus

Senior Member
#1
Aug 2, 2011
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#1
So I know that some of you are purposely celibate, and that's a lifetime choice you've made, so this isn't for those people.

I want to clarify some of my previous posts in light of some stuff I've been learning. So there are several verses in the Bible that say that God will provide for all of your needs if you're a follower of Christ. And the need for companionship (a spouse) is a legitimate need. So I would say that yes, God will provide one for you if you're trusting in Him. But I'm NOT saying that you can just sit on your butt and He will magically bring someone to your doorstep. Like any blessing, you have to trust that God is giving it to you and go seek after it. No one prays for a job and then waits by the phone for someone to call; you go out and apply and see what's out there and trust that God will help you find a good fit. The same concept is true for finding a spouse; you have to be around the opposite sex for it to happen, and mingle.

So yes, God will provide for you. But you have to put yourself out there!
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#2
#2
It would appear that you've answered your own question :)

He did it for Adam. I don't think He loves us any less than Adam, so I agree that the answer is probably yes. I also agree that God is probably not going to be dropping spouses from airplanes like care packages :)
 
AAAPlus

AAAPlus

Senior Member
#3
Aug 2, 2011
601
10
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#3
Jullianna said:
It would appear that you've answered your own question :)

He did it for Adam. I don't think He loves us any less than Adam, so I agree that the answer is probably yes. I also agree that God is probably not going to be dropping spouses from airplanes like care packages :)
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It wasn't actually a question...that was just the topic title. It's just a discussion topic and possible encouragement.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#4
Aug 2, 2009
24,581
4,269
113
#4
Jullianna said:
It would appear that you've answered your own question :)

He did it for Adam. I don't think He loves us any less than Adam, so I agree that the answer is probably yes. I also agree that God is probably not going to be dropping spouses from airplanes like care packages :)
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Well I have an extra rib or two.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#5
#5
AAAPlus said:
It wasn't actually a question...that was just the topic title. It's just a discussion topic and possible encouragement.
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s'all good :)
 
K

Kris3

Guest
#7
#7
Completely agreed! I have a lot of beautiful wonderful single friend's who don't understand this concept, but I don't believe that's how it'll work for them. :D
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#8
#8
I disagree. I dont think God will give everyone a spouse.

I know several very godly older women who have been searching for a spouse for 20 some years...
And now their in there 60s with still no spouse... how do you explain that? Because according to your theory god should have given them one.

Having a spouse is not in any way a legitimate need. Paul was never married and he was a very godly man, you would think God would have sent him a wife, since its a "legitimate need" he basically says marry if you must marry but its easier to serve the lord if you are not.

Marriage is not for the faint of heart, its work, its sadness at times, happiness, triumphs, failures. Most people cant hack it so they divorce. I believe god looks at us and considers each one of us individually and provides what each one of us actually needs, that may or may not be marriage included in that.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#9
#9
The more thought I give to this, the more my question becomes, since the scriptures tell us to marry if we have lust issues, and young widows in particular are told to marry, and when God saw that Adam was alone and said it wasn't good so He made Eve....if we DO need to marry for these reasons and we don't...does that mean that God didn't want us to marry or did we simply not do our part, as we do so many times when we desire something from God but aren't willing to go after it/wait for it/do whatever it is He's waiting on us to do?

Like salvation. The gift is THERE for the taking at all times, but many leave it lay. How many other godly gifts are treated the same way? Does it mean that the gift isn't there or that God never intended for us to have it?
 
N

niceguyJ

Senior Member
#10
Feb 5, 2011
520
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#10
Great post AAA! I was thinking about what you covered in there recently as well. I agree mostly...except...

NodMyHeadLikeYeah said:
I disagree. I dont think God will give everyone a spouse.

I know several very godly older women who have been searching for a spouse for 20 some years...
And now their in there 60s with still no spouse... how do you explain that? Because according to your theory god should have given them one.

Having a spouse is not in any way a legitimate need. Paul was never married and he was a very godly man, you would think God would have sent him a wife, since its a "legitimate need" he basically says marry if you must marry but its easier to serve the lord if you are not.

Marriage is not for the faint of heart, its work, its sadness at times, happiness, triumphs, failures. Most people cant hack it so they divorce. I believe god looks at us and considers each one of us individually and provides what each one of us actually needs, that may or may not be marriage included in that.
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..THAT. Totally agree with this one.
When someone is down about being single, etc. etc. others will often encourage them and tell them "Oh yes, God will send you someone." Honestly, I do not tell that to anyone because I don't know if He has that plan for them or not.

I also often see the "seek Him first and all things will ba added" verse thrown around related to this. I think I've even done that myself in the past, but not anymore. The more I've looked at that verse, and also what it follows, I just think it means God will give us what we need, but He might not give us everything we want. He knows best though. That's where faith in Him is really put to the test.
 
AAAPlus

AAAPlus

Senior Member
#11
Aug 2, 2011
601
10
18
#11
NodMyHeadLikeYeah said:
I disagree. I dont think God will give everyone a spouse.

I know several very godly older women who have been searching for a spouse for 20 some years...
And now their in there 60s with still no spouse... how do you explain that? Because according to your theory god should have given them one.

Having a spouse is not in any way a legitimate need. Paul was never married and he was a very godly man, you would think God would have sent him a wife, since its a "legitimate need" he basically says marry if you must marry but its easier to serve the lord if you are not.

Marriage is not for the faint of heart, its work, its sadness at times, happiness, triumphs, failures. Most people cant hack it so they divorce. I believe god looks at us and considers each one of us individually and provides what each one of us actually needs, that may or may not be marriage included in that.
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Concerning the 60-year-olds, perhaps they didn't trust in God, and rather just fretted about finding a spouse. And it is a legit need, as the Bible says so both in the OT and NT.

Now some people ARE called to celibacy, but those people are actually satisfied being alone. Jullianna explains it quite well:

Jullianna said:
The more thought I give to this, the more my question becomes, since the scriptures tell us to marry if we have lust issues, and young widows in particular are told to marry, and when God saw that Adam was alone and said it wasn't good so He made Eve....if we DO need to marry for these reasons and we don't...does that mean that God didn't want us to marry or did we simply not do our part, as we do so many times when we desire something from God but aren't willing to go after it/wait for it/do whatever it is He's waiting on us to do?

Like salvation. The gift is THERE for the taking at all times, but many leave it lay. How many other godly gifts are treated the same way? Does it mean that the gift isn't there or that God never intended for us to have it?
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Completely agree.
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#12
#12
AAAPlus said:
Concerning the 60-year-olds, perhaps they didn't trust in God, and rather just fretted about finding a spouse. And it is a legit need, as the Bible says so both in the OT and NT.

Now some people ARE called to celibacy, but those people are actually satisfied being alone. Jullianna explains it quite well:



Completely agree.
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Ok so what your saying is, if god has called someone to celibacy then he wont send that person a spouse, but if he has NOT called someone to celibacy and a person doesnt have a spouse its all because that person has not trusted God????? So its all their fault? So God would hold against them for the rest of their life this lack of trust, by not sending him or her a spouse?
Do you see how crazy that sounds?



Again i will ask...why were some of the greatest prophets not married? There is no mention of them being called to your term of celibacy... did they screw up in some way and not really trust God??

You sound like one of those people that say things like... well that person wouldnt have died if you had, had more faith, because God says he heals people!
 
AAAPlus

AAAPlus

Senior Member
#13
Aug 2, 2011
601
10
18
#13
NodMyHeadLikeYeah said:
Ok so what your saying is, if god has called someone to celibacy then he wont send that person a spouse, but if he has NOT called someone to celibacy and a person doesnt have a spouse its all because that person has not trusted God????? So its all their fault? So God would hold against them for the rest of their life this lack of trust, by not sending him or her a spouse?
Do you see how crazy that sounds?



Again i will ask...why were some of the greatest prophets not married? There is no mention of them being called to your term of celibacy... did they screw up in some way and not really trust God??

You sound like one of those people that say things like... well that person wouldnt have died if you had, had more faith, because God says he heals people!
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To answer your questions, in order: probably, possibly, yes, no, the Bible usually doesn't discuss whether they were or weren't, probably but it's irrelevant.
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#14
#14
AAAPlus said:
To answer your questions, in order: probably, possibly, yes, no, the Bible usually doesn't discuss whether they were or weren't, probably but it's irrelevant.
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Ahhhh from your response i see you clearly have nooooo idea ;) So then i rest my case.. Good day
 
C

chiclet01

Guest
#15
#15
Wow. That is... a lot of judgment there, AAAPlus.

I do wonder... how would you speak to a follower of God who married to a Christian, only for their spouse to have multiple affairs, abuse substances, stay unrepentant in those things, etc. Did God send them that spouse only to have the marriage fall apart and then (according to things I've seen you post elsewhere) condemn them to live alone (despite what you say is a legitimate need) because otherwise they are living in sin and the Kingdom of God has no place for them?

What do you say to that person? I'm going to go ahead and tell you now that the "your faith wasn't strong enough" argument really doesn't hold water there. Because your faith cannot control another's actions.
 
P

perdonato

Guest
#16
#16
I think that it's best we live the lives we're given the best we can. The same idea as meeting other people can be used in asking how we reach out to share Christ in the world if we lead lifestyles that don't interact with others. I don't think God gives everybody a spouse and not everyone REALIZES they are called into celibacy. But don't we end up where we're supposed to end up anyway? I do believe everything happens for a reason - as awful or fantastic as it is. So to say that someone isn't "called into celibacy" but never marries... weren't they then called into it?

...nonetheless, obviously God doesn't drop spouses from airplanes like care packages. You have to order them! I don't know about the rest of you, but I ordered my husband online a while ago. Hopefully he didn't get lost in shipping.
 
AAAPlus

AAAPlus

Senior Member
#17
Aug 2, 2011
601
10
18
#17
chiclet01 said:
Wow. That is... a lot of judgment there, AAAPlus.

I do wonder... how would you speak to a follower of God who married to a Christian, only for their spouse to have multiple affairs, abuse substances, stay unrepentant in those things, etc. Did God send them that spouse only to have the marriage fall apart and then (according to things I've seen you post elsewhere) condemn them to live alone (despite what you say is a legitimate need) because otherwise they are living in sin and the Kingdom of God has no place for them?

What do you say to that person? I'm going to go ahead and tell you now that the "your faith wasn't strong enough" argument really doesn't hold water there. Because your faith cannot control another's actions.
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That's something I didn't consider. The sins of others can screw things up for us, and often there isn't really anything we can do about it. Thank you for sharing that with us.
 
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