How do i choose God when i feel mentally unstable?

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Jan 18, 2019
50
39
18
#1
How do I choose God? (sorry this is unorganized and long)

Hi. I’ve been afraid a lot of myself. I love Jesus and I’ve been close to him, but I’ve been getting so distracted at home by technology and addictions.

I feel like I give up so easily, and when I do, God wakes me up from my sin hours after I chose to mess up and it terrifies me. I drown so long after I choose sin, I forget I exist, I forget about God.

Apart of me just misses him so much during sin, and it increases the more time that goes on, and that helps me wake up but I just feel stuck in the sin I don’t know how to choose him when my mind feels so broken and stupid. I should read the Bible, I should pray, but how should I do it? Why is it so scary sometimes, when digitally a bible is so close, I could even look up bible verses on anxiety to help me focus on Him.

I constantly hear in my mind I can’t seek God because I can’t choose him. I know deep down I can, but my mind holds me back.

Why do I keep wanting so deeply to forget everything? Only God makes me really feel alive, but a part of me so fearful! It feels so hard to approach God because I can’t choose him like I should! He’s so so close but I am so utterly stupid I can’t choose him!

Sometimes I want to harm myself, not to the point of death or intensely, maybe just a punch to my arm or my face because of how I feel so unstable and lack self-control. I know God forgives me but I just want to try to make amends for so much of my lack of self-control.

I am deeply terrified of this problem. I planned a whole summer to seek God and be with him after I first met him during the school year, but it became a nightmare as I became a disappointment time after time. All the failures are making me lose confidence that I could ever choose God like I should and I’ll be stuck in distractions and addictions trying to forget I exist to forget my disappointment. I need him, but I can’t choose him like I should because of my own sinfulness! I hate myself so much sometimes because I keep holding myself back.

He always pursues me, but how do I choose him when I’m so sinful and my mind keeps trying to pull me to say no? I’m such a coward in not trying more like I should.

I want to receive the peace and loves God gives, but how do I choose him to do so if I keep trying to run away to forget everything. How do I choose him when I’m so sinful and unstable?

What should I do?
 

Wayne_Gearing

Active member
Mar 6, 2020
416
229
43
#2
God guides us in so many ways and it's becoming clear that He guided you here to find help. I too have suffered from severe addiction and I still struggle with a certain dangerous addiction but I found what helps (bear in mind, this is not a one shot, cure all solution)

Like me, you focused in so much on the sin and addiction itself that you forgot to zoom out and look around you. See that tree? God made that! See that bird? God looks after him no matter what and so it continues, starting to see God in all of the small things around you is a good place to start

I was once sitting in an AA meeting and someone said to me "Take it day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute if you have to"... That brought me a much needed relief, I don't need to worry about next week, tomorrow or even the rest of today because it's what I do in the next 5 minutes that counts!

God wants you to talk to Him, even when you are teetering on the verge of sin, you can cry out to Him and He will answer you!
 

Lafftur

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2017
4,439
2,093
113
#3
How do I choose God? (sorry this is unorganized and long)

Hi. I’ve been afraid a lot of myself. I love Jesus and I’ve been close to him, but I’ve been getting so distracted at home by technology and addictions.

I feel like I give up so easily, and when I do, God wakes me up from my sin hours after I chose to mess up and it terrifies me. I drown so long after I choose sin, I forget I exist, I forget about God.

Apart of me just misses him so much during sin, and it increases the more time that goes on, and that helps me wake up but I just feel stuck in the sin I don’t know how to choose him when my mind feels so broken and stupid. I should read the Bible, I should pray, but how should I do it? Why is it so scary sometimes, when digitally a bible is so close, I could even look up bible verses on anxiety to help me focus on Him.

I constantly hear in my mind I can’t seek God because I can’t choose him. I know deep down I can, but my mind holds me back.

Why do I keep wanting so deeply to forget everything? Only God makes me really feel alive, but a part of me so fearful! It feels so hard to approach God because I can’t choose him like I should! He’s so so close but I am so utterly stupid I can’t choose him!

Sometimes I want to harm myself, not to the point of death or intensely, maybe just a punch to my arm or my face because of how I feel so unstable and lack self-control. I know God forgives me but I just want to try to make amends for so much of my lack of self-control.

I am deeply terrified of this problem. I planned a whole summer to seek God and be with him after I first met him during the school year, but it became a nightmare as I became a disappointment time after time. All the failures are making me lose confidence that I could ever choose God like I should and I’ll be stuck in distractions and addictions trying to forget I exist to forget my disappointment. I need him, but I can’t choose him like I should because of my own sinfulness! I hate myself so much sometimes because I keep holding myself back.

He always pursues me, but how do I choose him when I’m so sinful and my mind keeps trying to pull me to say no? I’m such a coward in not trying more like I should.

I want to receive the peace and loves God gives, but how do I choose him to do so if I keep trying to run away to forget everything. How do I choose him when I’m so sinful and unstable?

What should I do?

Just say out loud, "I CHOOSE JESUS, everything else that is not of God - get out of my heart, mind, body and thoughts, in the Name of Jesus!"

"Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus, forgive me of all my sins. I receive the Gift of Salvation and the Gift of Your Holy Spirit. Baptize me with Your Holy Spirit and Fill me. Help me, in the Name of Yeshua/Jesus, amen."
 

Lafftur

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2017
4,439
2,093
113
#4
Clean house, get rid of stuff that you know is not pleasing to God.

Get a healthy lifestyle - eat good food for you, exercise, good hobbies, acts of kindness for others, put yourself on a schedule - plan your time for each day so you don't have any idle time.

God will help you. You are loved. :love:
 
Dec 15, 2016
104
25
18
#5
Hi just remember we all fail to live a perfect life but god always give us an opprutinity to turn it around God has much love to give but you need to make an effort to seek him out
 

Runningman

Active member
Mar 4, 2020
157
159
43
#6
The very fact that you are even conscious of your sin and that it pains you so much is a testament of your changed heart. Your heart, that small internal aching/feeling that throbs within you to remind you where you messed up and fills you with joy when you succeed is working correctly.

We have a choice each day to listen to this internal mechanism. Start following how your heart is leading you to God, make this a habbit, focus on it daily, and stop ignoring it.

I believe in grace and I absolutely believe your faith in Christ will save you. The flesh is weak, but the spirit is willing: this is the state of every man and woman. No matter how mature a believer is in their ability to stop sinning, there is always one more sin to be knocked down. While on Earth the war between flesh and spirit will continue.

So don't be too hard on yourself, but take sin seriously. It will keep you from living your best possible life as a Child of God. You're going to keep carrying anxiety and depression around with you until you shape up.

I've found in my own personal life when I finally overcome a major sin or a habitual sin that I'll say "woohoo! Praise God, thank you Jesus!" Then another sin emerges that I didn't notice before. Then another one emerges, and another, and another. No one ever fully stops and becomes Jesus. All of those sins - go ahead and pray and confess those to God. Don't hold back any of the gritty, embarrassing, or shameful details from Him. He can take it and isnt a fan if self-righteous attitudes anyway.Ask for help, and wisdom.

I'm in your corner and so is God. Prayers for you. Feel free to PM me any time.
 

KhedetOrthos

Active member
Dec 13, 2019
284
154
43
#7
How do I choose God? (sorry this is unorganized and long)?

What should I do?
...one of the main problems with Churches today is that they concentrate too much on the promises or gifts of God without giving people who need to take up their cross to follow Jesus the tools to do this.

...remember that St. Paul compared the Christian life to a race. Would you go enter the Boston marathon and expect to do well without training?

...do you have a prayer rule? Do you read the Bible every day?
 

mar09

Senior Member
Sep 17, 2014
4,603
944
113
#8
...one of the main problems with Churches today is that they concentrate too much on the promises or gifts of God without giving people who need to take up their cross to follow Jesus the tools to do this.

...remember that St. Paul compared the Christian life to a race. Would you go enter the Boston marathon and expect to do well without training?

...do you have a prayer rule? Do you read the Bible every day?
Yes, how impt to read God's word everyday. Feed your mind w/ good Food you can retrieve when you need them! The enemy will want to get ur mind wandering, but God is faithful. We have to cling to His truths and not be distracted. STrive to listen to uplifting music wc will remind u when tempted to turn left or right!
 
Feb 9, 2014
166
30
28
#9
How do I choose God? (sorry this is unorganized and long)

Hi. I’ve been afraid a lot of myself. I love Jesus and I’ve been close to him, but I’ve been getting so distracted at home by technology and addictions.

I feel like I give up so easily, and when I do, God wakes me up from my sin hours after I chose to mess up and it terrifies me. I drown so long after I choose sin, I forget I exist, I forget about God.

Apart of me just misses him so much during sin, and it increases the more time that goes on, and that helps me wake up but I just feel stuck in the sin I don’t know how to choose him when my mind feels so broken and stupid. I should read the Bible, I should pray, but how should I do it? Why is it so scary sometimes, when digitally a bible is so close, I could even look up bible verses on anxiety to help me focus on Him.

I constantly hear in my mind I can’t seek God because I can’t choose him. I know deep down I can, but my mind holds me back.

Why do I keep wanting so deeply to forget everything? Only God makes me really feel alive, but a part of me so fearful! It feels so hard to approach God because I can’t choose him like I should! He’s so so close but I am so utterly stupid I can’t choose him!

Sometimes I want to harm myself, not to the point of death or intensely, maybe just a punch to my arm or my face because of how I feel so unstable and lack self-control. I know God forgives me but I just want to try to make amends for so much of my lack of self-control.

I am deeply terrified of this problem. I planned a whole summer to seek God and be with him after I first met him during the school year, but it became a nightmare as I became a disappointment time after time. All the failures are making me lose confidence that I could ever choose God like I should and I’ll be stuck in distractions and addictions trying to forget I exist to forget my disappointment. I need him, but I can’t choose him like I should because of my own sinfulness! I hate myself so much sometimes because I keep holding myself back.

He always pursues me, but how do I choose him when I’m so sinful and my mind keeps trying to pull me to say no? I’m such a coward in not trying more like I should.

I want to receive the peace and loves God gives, but how do I choose him to do so if I keep trying to run away to forget everything. How do I choose him when I’m so sinful and unstable?

What should I do?
So, we must bear in the question here, why do you feel guilty? You see, the Bible tells we may feel pain or guilt or disappointment for a myriad of reasons. There is such a thing as godly sorrow leading to repentance; so you must ask yourself, have I been willfully sinning? If yes, repent. If you haven't, perhaps you feel guilt because of someone else's sin; in this case, pray for them, and forgive them if they repent. Perhaps it is just a mental issue; in which case the only advice I can give is read the Bible--thats what I did when I was in the ward with schizo bipolar. Also, rejoice in our sufferings, for it produces godly character...especially if the suffering is unjust or uncaused.
 

laughingheart

Senior Member
Sep 21, 2016
1,477
1,365
113
#10
When we come to the end of ourselves, when we acknowledge we can't do it by our own strength, is when you realize we never could. Instead of trying to hold on, ask Him to hold you. He will hold you and shelter you. Thank Him, trust Him and rest. If you don't know how to do these things, ask Him to show you how.
 
Apr 25, 2020
38
27
18
#11
How do I choose God? (sorry this is unorganized and long)

Hi. I’ve been afraid a lot of myself. I love Jesus and I’ve been close to him, but I’ve been getting so distracted at home by technology and addictions.

I feel like I give up so easily, and when I do, God wakes me up from my sin hours after I chose to mess up and it terrifies me. I drown so long after I choose sin, I forget I exist, I forget about God.

Apart of me just misses him so much during sin, and it increases the more time that goes on, and that helps me wake up but I just feel stuck in the sin I don’t know how to choose him when my mind feels so broken and stupid. I should read the Bible, I should pray, but how should I do it? Why is it so scary sometimes, when digitally a bible is so close, I could even look up bible verses on anxiety to help me focus on Him.

I constantly hear in my mind I can’t seek God because I can’t choose him. I know deep down I can, but my mind holds me back.

Why do I keep wanting so deeply to forget everything? Only God makes me really feel alive, but a part of me so fearful! It feels so hard to approach God because I can’t choose him like I should! He’s so so close but I am so utterly stupid I can’t choose him!

Sometimes I want to harm myself, not to the point of death or intensely, maybe just a punch to my arm or my face because of how I feel so unstable and lack self-control. I know God forgives me but I just want to try to make amends for so much of my lack of self-control.

I am deeply terrified of this problem. I planned a whole summer to seek God and be with him after I first met him during the school year, but it became a nightmare as I became a disappointment time after time. All the failures are making me lose confidence that I could ever choose God like I should and I’ll be stuck in distractions and addictions trying to forget I exist to forget my disappointment. I need him, but I can’t choose him like I should because of my own sinfulness! I hate myself so much sometimes because I keep holding myself back.

He always pursues me, but how do I choose him when I’m so sinful and my mind keeps trying to pull me to say no? I’m such a coward in not trying more like I should.

I want to receive the peace and loves God gives, but how do I choose him to do so if I keep trying to run away to forget everything. How do I choose him when I’m so sinful and unstable?

What should I do?
Take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.
Read 2 Corinthians 10:5
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
29,716
7,975
113
#12
“Be still and know that I am God... " Psalm 46:10a
 

DrGuyPhD

New member
May 23, 2020
16
8
3
#13
How do I choose God? (sorry this is unorganized and long)

Hi. I’ve been afraid a lot of myself. I love Jesus and I’ve been close to him, but I’ve been getting so distracted at home by technology and addictions.

I feel like I give up so easily, and when I do, God wakes me up from my sin hours after I chose to mess up and it terrifies me. I drown so long after I choose sin, I forget I exist, I forget about God.

Apart of me just misses him so much during sin, and it increases the more time that goes on, and that helps me wake up but I just feel stuck in the sin I don’t know how to choose him when my mind feels so broken and stupid. I should read the Bible, I should pray, but how should I do it? Why is it so scary sometimes, when digitally a bible is so close, I could even look up bible verses on anxiety to help me focus on Him.

I constantly hear in my mind I can’t seek God because I can’t choose him. I know deep down I can, but my mind holds me back.

Why do I keep wanting so deeply to forget everything? Only God makes me really feel alive, but a part of me so fearful! It feels so hard to approach God because I can’t choose him like I should! He’s so so close but I am so utterly stupid I can’t choose him!

Sometimes I want to harm myself, not to the point of death or intensely, maybe just a punch to my arm or my face because of how I feel so unstable and lack self-control. I know God forgives me but I just want to try to make amends for so much of my lack of self-control.

I am deeply terrified of this problem. I planned a whole summer to seek God and be with him after I first met him during the school year, but it became a nightmare as I became a disappointment time after time. All the failures are making me lose confidence that I could ever choose God like I should and I’ll be stuck in distractions and addictions trying to forget I exist to forget my disappointment. I need him, but I can’t choose him like I should because of my own sinfulness! I hate myself so much sometimes because I keep holding myself back.

He always pursues me, but how do I choose him when I’m so sinful and my mind keeps trying to pull me to say no? I’m such a coward in not trying more like I should.

I want to receive the peace and loves God gives, but how do I choose him to do so if I keep trying to run away to forget everything. How do I choose him when I’m so sinful and unstable?

What should I do?
I know exactly what you mean. I was stuck in an addiction and felt the same way you did about wanting to grow with God, but feeling that it was out of my control to get rid of the sins that I felt were keeping God at a distance. However, one of my favorite quotes says, "God did not come into this world to make bad people good, he came into this world to make dead people live." This is so powerful, because this means that with the coming of Jesus, God does not expect us to win on our own. We are not left with our own thoughts and devices, but it is God that gives a new heart and mind. I prayed for that, and even through my addiction God gave me the heart and mind to love him and to want to get better. And the bible says, "we are transformed by the renewing of your mind". So trust me, what's going on with you now does not surprise God. He knew this would happen from the beginning. He provided a way for you to have victory over your addiction. I am still fighting to see freedom and I see it's affects. I recommend the first thing you do every morning is to get up and read the word of God, pray over it, pray about what worries you, WORSHIP God for he is worthy of praise no matter what. It is in that secret place that you win the war over your mind. And also, find someone to help with accountability and take responsibility for your actions. Temptation and sin kept in secret has no choice but to grow! I hope that helped. Your question definitely helped me!!
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
29,716
7,975
113
#14
I know exactly what you mean. I was stuck in an addiction and felt the same way you did about wanting to grow with God, but feeling that it was out of my control to get rid of the sins that I felt were keeping God at a distance. However, one of my favorite quotes says, "God did not come into this world to make bad people good, he came into this world to make dead people live." This is so powerful, because this means that with the coming of Jesus, God does not expect us to win on our own. We are not left with our own thoughts and devices, but it is God that gives a new heart and mind. I prayed for that, and even through my addiction God gave me the heart and mind to love him and to want to get better. And the bible says, "we are transformed by the renewing of your mind". So trust me, what's going on with you now does not surprise God. He knew this would happen from the beginning. He provided a way for you to have victory over your addiction. I am still fighting to see freedom and I see it's affects. I recommend the first thing you do every morning is to get up and read the word of God, pray over it, pray about what worries you, WORSHIP God for he is worthy of praise no matter what. It is in that secret place that you win the war over your mind. And also, find someone to help with accountability and take responsibility for your actions. Temptation and sin kept in secret has no choice but to grow! I hope that helped. Your question definitely helped me!!










:)