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God has blessed me with a good handful of people who I can call close friends, and even so close that I feel as if they are my real brother and sister( which they are in Christ, but you know). For a long time, I wanted ' friends' but what I really wanted was popularity because I was looking for quantity and not quality( not say you;re doing the same, but just giving some background here). I asked God for some real friends, and boy did he ever....
Having said that, the friends I have are just as it's described in the bible
1) Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
Real friends stick with ya through the good and bad times, not just the good times. And I'm not alluding to the stupid saying of " a friend will bail you out of jail, but a real friend will be in the jail cell with you" type of friend the world might spew. I'm talking about a friend will love at all times by being your counselor when you're confused, a shoulder to cry on when you're sad and an encourager when things seem hopeless. Brothers are born for adversity, aka adverse times in your life. if a person show little interest when somethings bothers you or they give you flippant( not well thought out) advice, then that person is NOT a friend
2) Proverbs 18:24 A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
Again, I had to learn this the hard way, it's quality not quantity that matters. A ' freind who sticks closer than a brother' is a strong statement meaning that no matter what you;re going to do, that f riend will be there for you. If you;re doing something stupid, that friend will be there to stop you. if you are about to taking on something huge, that friend will be there. etc etc.
3) Proverbs 19:4 Wealth brings many friends, but a poor man's friend deserts him.
Watch out for friends who only care about stuff you have. if you realize that your only connection to your ' friends' is stuff you have that you both do, then you might want to readjust how tight your ties are to them.
4) Proverbs 27:6 Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.
People who only agree with you because it's convinient to do so aren't real friends. They will kiss up to you and make you feel good, but the"kisses' are shallow. Sometimes, when you;re going down the wrong path, a real friend will lovingly correct you, even if he has to do it a bit harshly (been there done that...)
I could go on, but Proverbs has so much in it about true friends. Of course someone who loves their neighbor( you) like themselves is also a good indication of someone who is a good friend. Someone who puts others before themselves. God has blessed me with such as these and I can;t be grateful enough about it!!
I hope this helps ^_^
Having said that, the friends I have are just as it's described in the bible
1) Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
Real friends stick with ya through the good and bad times, not just the good times. And I'm not alluding to the stupid saying of " a friend will bail you out of jail, but a real friend will be in the jail cell with you" type of friend the world might spew. I'm talking about a friend will love at all times by being your counselor when you're confused, a shoulder to cry on when you're sad and an encourager when things seem hopeless. Brothers are born for adversity, aka adverse times in your life. if a person show little interest when somethings bothers you or they give you flippant( not well thought out) advice, then that person is NOT a friend
2) Proverbs 18:24 A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
Again, I had to learn this the hard way, it's quality not quantity that matters. A ' freind who sticks closer than a brother' is a strong statement meaning that no matter what you;re going to do, that f riend will be there for you. If you;re doing something stupid, that friend will be there to stop you. if you are about to taking on something huge, that friend will be there. etc etc.
3) Proverbs 19:4 Wealth brings many friends, but a poor man's friend deserts him.
Watch out for friends who only care about stuff you have. if you realize that your only connection to your ' friends' is stuff you have that you both do, then you might want to readjust how tight your ties are to them.
4) Proverbs 27:6 Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.
People who only agree with you because it's convinient to do so aren't real friends. They will kiss up to you and make you feel good, but the"kisses' are shallow. Sometimes, when you;re going down the wrong path, a real friend will lovingly correct you, even if he has to do it a bit harshly (been there done that...)
I could go on, but Proverbs has so much in it about true friends. Of course someone who loves their neighbor( you) like themselves is also a good indication of someone who is a good friend. Someone who puts others before themselves. God has blessed me with such as these and I can;t be grateful enough about it!!
I hope this helps ^_^
C
Beau,
I know this is a rather late reply.. for that I apologize.
A real friend is always willing to do whatever they can for you. They are there for you if you need them.
But, we are mere humans. Humans are full of flaws and imperfections. Sometimes we can say things that will hurt others, simply because we ourselves are hurting. Goodness knows, I've done this many times, and I'm sure you yourself have done it also, as would everyone one else on this forum... and no doubt, every other person in the world.
If you believe your friend is acting strangely, or you doubt him/her because of a way that they have spoken to you, etc, then it may be because there is something wrong with THEM. So perhaps ask them if they are ok, and if they have any problems that you could help with. Even just listening, when there is nothing you CAN do, really does help SO much more than you would think.
Someone may have started rumours about YOU, and your friend has heard. It only takes one person to tell someone something, and they will doubt YOUR friendship… which can lead you to doubt theirs.
If you ever feel helpless, or don’t know what to do and no advice is helping you, just remember to PRAY. God isn’t there to be ignored. He’s there to help… and wants to help… but He won’t always help unless you first ASK Him to.
But you cannot rely on prayer alone, and think that God will just ‘snap His fingers’, and problem solved. When He answers prayers, it doesn’t work like that. He will give you resources… you still have to fix the problem yourself. Otherwise, there would be no challenges in this life. If every time you wanted something, or needed something done/fix, you simply prayed and it were done… there would be no challenges in life. We need challenges, or our lives would not be worth living. Just as we need God, or our lives are not worth living.
Just be sure they know that you are always there for you friends... They will always be there for you. And if they aren't - if they turn away from you when you really need them... then they are not TRUE friends.
But just because they are not true friends toward you, does not mean you cannot be a true friend to them.
Remember: forgiveness is strength.
Remember this also; that people are each responsible for their own self. They become what they wish to become. If someone wants to become something, they will do everything in their power to become it. And I don't only mean occupational-wise... I mean in personality [and spirituality] also.
You must accept each and every person for who they are. After all, if every person was the same, this world would be pretty boring!!
Now I'm just hoping that all I've written makes sense, and there are no errors in there
^ ^,
I know this is a rather late reply.. for that I apologize.
A real friend is always willing to do whatever they can for you. They are there for you if you need them.
But, we are mere humans. Humans are full of flaws and imperfections. Sometimes we can say things that will hurt others, simply because we ourselves are hurting. Goodness knows, I've done this many times, and I'm sure you yourself have done it also, as would everyone one else on this forum... and no doubt, every other person in the world.
If you believe your friend is acting strangely, or you doubt him/her because of a way that they have spoken to you, etc, then it may be because there is something wrong with THEM. So perhaps ask them if they are ok, and if they have any problems that you could help with. Even just listening, when there is nothing you CAN do, really does help SO much more than you would think.
Someone may have started rumours about YOU, and your friend has heard. It only takes one person to tell someone something, and they will doubt YOUR friendship… which can lead you to doubt theirs.
If you ever feel helpless, or don’t know what to do and no advice is helping you, just remember to PRAY. God isn’t there to be ignored. He’s there to help… and wants to help… but He won’t always help unless you first ASK Him to.
But you cannot rely on prayer alone, and think that God will just ‘snap His fingers’, and problem solved. When He answers prayers, it doesn’t work like that. He will give you resources… you still have to fix the problem yourself. Otherwise, there would be no challenges in this life. If every time you wanted something, or needed something done/fix, you simply prayed and it were done… there would be no challenges in life. We need challenges, or our lives would not be worth living. Just as we need God, or our lives are not worth living.
Just be sure they know that you are always there for you friends... They will always be there for you. And if they aren't - if they turn away from you when you really need them... then they are not TRUE friends.
But just because they are not true friends toward you, does not mean you cannot be a true friend to them.
Remember: forgiveness is strength.
Remember this also; that people are each responsible for their own self. They become what they wish to become. If someone wants to become something, they will do everything in their power to become it. And I don't only mean occupational-wise... I mean in personality [and spirituality] also.
You must accept each and every person for who they are. After all, if every person was the same, this world would be pretty boring!!
Now I'm just hoping that all I've written makes sense, and there are no errors in there
^ ^,
S
ok sooo....
i've always been one of few friends... im only 19 which means i just graduated from high school last year and every knows how the high school things goes especially for girls...
but any who.... i was friends with my best friend since 5th grade and everything was good untill we got saved (go figure) and she was the one who brought me in... long story short... she chose to leave the church for unnamed reasons and i chose to stay which drove a big wedge between us....
so i guess the moral of my story would be... in friendships that are longer... you can tell by how they hadle the decisions that you make... i believe that if she was really down for me then she would have more or less encouraged me to stay because her reason for leaving would not in the least bit have benifited me.... but yea....
just pray that God would show you the hearts of man and youll be fine...
oh yes... a key point... they will tell you the truth even if the truth sucks a bit....
i've always been one of few friends... im only 19 which means i just graduated from high school last year and every knows how the high school things goes especially for girls...
but any who.... i was friends with my best friend since 5th grade and everything was good untill we got saved (go figure) and she was the one who brought me in... long story short... she chose to leave the church for unnamed reasons and i chose to stay which drove a big wedge between us....
so i guess the moral of my story would be... in friendships that are longer... you can tell by how they hadle the decisions that you make... i believe that if she was really down for me then she would have more or less encouraged me to stay because her reason for leaving would not in the least bit have benifited me.... but yea....
just pray that God would show you the hearts of man and youll be fine...
oh yes... a key point... they will tell you the truth even if the truth sucks a bit....
L
Well I guess you would know if they are friend if they were always there for you, even on bad days. Do they encourage you and lift you up? Or do they constantly talk in a condensing way and never have respect? I have a policy about friends, once your someones friend your their friend forever, even if they have done every possible thing to make you dislike them. Thats what it means to be a true friend, a real friend, a friend in Christ. <3
We live in a self-centered,egoistic world,real friends are those ppl who dont backbite..a hi,a gentle smile,a touch all matters and speak volumes but it is very hard to even find a true christian friend..none of us are without any blemish but instead of looking out for a truefriend we shall be one..when you smile the world smiles but when you cry you alone..a true friend is one who could give you his shoulders to cry,one who prays with you and prays for you,above all be it a christian or nonchristian if our conduct is good then we receive the same from them too..he or she is the one who enjoys your success and help you to become a better person without any jealously..