Need help with adultery ??

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Apriljanaee

Guest
#1
#1
Before anyone tell me how wrong sex before marriage is.. I know.
I've been in a seriously relationship for over a year now, we have been having sex. I kno, tisk tisk.
I'm growing in my faith right now, & I kno I need to change my actions now. I need help telling my boyfriend I want to stop having sex until we're married..
I kno it sounds simple but he's very covered in lust- so am I, I just need help quitting this without him getting upset.
 
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Ugly

Guest
#2
#2
Apriljanaee said:
Before anyone tell me how wrong sex before marriage is.. I know.
I've been in a seriously relationship for over a year now, we have been having sex. I kno, tisk tisk.
I'm growing in my faith right now, & I kno I need to change my actions now. I need help telling my boyfriend I want to stop having sex until we're married..
I kno it sounds simple but he's very covered in lust- so am I, I just need help quitting this without him getting upset.
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Its simple. If he isn't feeling the same way, then he will be upset. There is no way to make major relationship changes that pull things out of the relationship without their previously agreeing to it as well, and think that you can do it without upsetting them. The very nature of what you're doing is an upsetting act. Your question is akin to saying 'how do i hit someone with a baseball but, but yet not injure them?'.
 
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Anonimous

Guest
#3
#3
No thanks...I'll pass on this one.................
 
Shawn2516

Shawn2516

Senior Member
#4
Dec 20, 2013
154
1
0
#4
Before anyone tell me how wrong sex before marriage is.. I know.
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Cool.

I've been in a seriously relationship for over a year now, we have been having sex. I kno, tisk tisk.
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Do you live with the guy? It would be a lot harder to commit the sin if you were separated in different apartments.

I'm growing in my faith right now, & I kno I need to change my actions now. I need help telling my boyfriend I want to stop having sex until we're married..
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If he's not a christian, then he will not understand.

I kno it sounds simple but he's very covered in lust- so am I, I just need help quitting this without him getting upset.
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Not going to happen. Most guys are with girls for sex. If you cut it off, he'll be very upset. Your just going to have to make a decision what is more important. Your boyfriend or Christ.
 
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SparkleEyes

Senior Member
#5
Mar 23, 2013
771
21
18
#5
The accepted definition for adultery is "sex between a married person and someone who is not that person's wife or husband".

Sex between unmarried people is not adultery, but that doesn't mean God thinks it is ok. We are told time and time again in the Bible that sex is best left to a man and a woman who are married to each other. :cool:
 
jag1977

jag1977

Banned
#6
Nov 2, 2013
1,380
6
0
#6
I worked for days laboring through scriptures on one message I had. After years...understanding I found and it was the most beautiful I had. It was perfect. Then from the world a whisper of new beauty. In my mind I desired to know their understanding for it was also beautiful and New. My works and labor soon faded and God shut down that one trickle that connected once was my understanding...that I took for a wife.
 
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ServantStrike

Guest
#7
#7
SparkleEyes said:
The accepted definition for adultery is "sex between a married person and someone who is not that person's wife or husband".

Sex between unmarried people is not adultery, but that doesn't mean God thinks it is ok. We are told time and time again in the Bible that sex is best left to a man and a woman who are married to each other. :cool:
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Which is why I prefer when bible verses use the word fornication.

Fornication is not adultery, it's sex between unmarried people.

jag1977 said:
I worked for days laboring through scriptures on one message I had. After years...understanding I found and it was the most beautiful I had. It was perfect. Then from the world a whisper of new beauty. In my mind I desired to know their understanding for it was also beautiful and New. My works and labor soon faded and God shut down that one trickle that connected once was my understanding...that I took for a wife.
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Are you saying this was a good thing, or a bad thing? And are you saying getting married harmed your faith?




To the OP, if your boyfriend is also a Christian, then this could work - although if so you guys seriously didn't read the directions. You're going to have to tell him you realize now you just can't be having sex. Best to learn to control things now, before you have regrets later.
 
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cubfan716

Guest
#8
#8
Apriljanaee said:
Before anyone tell me how wrong sex before marriage is.. I know.
I've been in a seriously relationship for over a year now, we have been having sex. I kno, tisk tisk.
I'm growing in my faith right now, & I kno I need to change my actions now. I need help telling my boyfriend I want to stop having sex until we're married..
I kno it sounds simple but he's very covered in lust- so am I, I just need help quitting this without him getting upset.
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Flee also youthful lusts; but pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart. (2 Timothy 2:22).

I read the following in the book When God Writes your Love Story by Eric and Leslie Ludy:

If you are currently in the midst of a crooked, self-satisfying relationship, then the first step is make sure you give Christ His rightful position moving forward. And (gulp) that may mean you need to end the relationship in which you are currently engaged. That said, our God is a redemption, and if He wants your relationship to move forward and thrive, He is perfectly capable of taking what was crooked and self-satisfying and transforming it into something pure, beautiful, and God-glorifying.

Bottom line: God can redeem only that which we hand fully over to Him. If you want your love story to come from His hand, then the relationship you are currently in needs to be surrendered. You must allow Him to take it, to dissolve it if necessary, to clean it, purify it, or even to rebuild it from scratch if He so desires. The point is, the relationship must be His and no longer your property. Yes, it may need to end, or there may need to be a season of separation in which a healthy foundation can be built. But whatever it may mean, I can assure you that when you love life becomes His, amazing things will happen.

Remember that if you delight yourself in the Lord He will grant you the desires of your heart!
 
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sureshjames

Guest
#9
#9
marry him as soon as possible
 
AAAPlus

AAAPlus

Senior Member
#10
Aug 2, 2011
601
10
18
#10
Apriljanaee said:
Before anyone tell me how wrong sex before marriage is.. I know.
I've been in a seriously relationship for over a year now, we have been having sex. I kno, tisk tisk.
I'm growing in my faith right now, & I kno I need to change my actions now. I need help telling my boyfriend I want to stop having sex until we're married..
I kno it sounds simple but he's very covered in lust- so am I, I just need help quitting this without him getting upset.
Click to expand...
You don't want to hear it, but the only way is to break up with him and not get back together. Being a Christian requires complete life-change, and someone who is not in the same place in their faith IS going to drag you down.
 
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