Married in heart?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
A

amazed

Guest
#61
#61
If you marry a divorced woman, you are committing adultery .. as is she .. read the word.
 
K

Kisses1990

Guest
#62
#62
^^ nonsense
 
J

jimmydiggs

Guest
#64
#64
Kisses1990 said:
^^ nonsense
Click to expand...
Scripture.

Matthew 5:32
But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

Does your heart tell you Jesus was wrong here too?
 
K

Kisses1990

Guest
#65
#65
^^ Wrong. God allows divorce in certain circumstances. The original poster did not specify what conditions were present. There are some cases where divorce is acceptable. It's not always adultery. If you've been beaten, cheated on, and all sorts of horrible irreconcilable things, then it's ok.

Are you saying if this happened to you, you divorced, God would say NEVER to marry again? Or what if your partner dies? Your forced into being a widow forever?

Why are you avoiding my question on your own reasons for not being baptized? I don't mean to be nosy, but I'm very curious because of what you said in the other post about it could be disrespectful to God. So why haven't you? It seems like a contradiction.

EDIT

I see we agree. I didn't realize you quoted Mathew. So, as it turns out, I was right all along and you were just trying to argue. But we actually agree.

Now I ask you, a woman who was abused and cheated on who gets divorced......they can NEVER marry again?!
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Christianrkchk89

Christianrkchk89

Senior Member
#66
Aug 27, 2005
1,282
12
38
35
#66
This thread just makes me sad. Everyone leads with feelings and their heart now and they totally disregard what Jesus says is right. I can't stand all this "I can do absolutely whatever and God won't be mad" mumbo jumbo. "As long as I'm happy that's all that matters."
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#67
#67
ok......if you want an answer based on scripture.

since he left and was an unbeliever, she has grounds to divorce him from a Bible stand point. I'll post the scriptures if someone hasn't already.

However, since she has NOT divorced him and you have NOT been married. then you are both living in sin and should get married in reality and not just in heart.

you can get divorced even if the other person doesn't show up in court. a lawyer or clerk will be able to tell you what papers to fill and the whole process. I think you fill under abandonment or desertion.

Grounds for Absolute Divorce | The People's Law Library

"

  • Some fault grounds don’t require a waiting period and allow you to obtain a divorce immediately.
To obtain a fault-based divorce, you will have to prove that your spouse acted in certain ways. The fault grounds include: adultery, desertion, conviction of a crime, insanity, cruelty of treatment, and excessively vicious conduct (this article discusses each of these grounds in more detail below)."


[h=3]Desertion[/h] Desertion is a “fault” ground for divorce, and therefore may be a factor in the award of alimony and custody. Desertion may be actual or "constructive."

Generally, in actual desertion, the deserting spouse abandons the marital home without justification. In "constructive" desertion, the person who leaves is justified and the court will consider the leaving spouse the deserted one.

To prove actual desertion, the spouse seeking the divorce must prove the following:

  • The deserting spouse intended to end the marriage;
  • Cohabitation (living together or having sexual intercourse) has ended;
  • The deserter’s leaving was not justified;
  • The parties are beyond any reasonable hope of reconciliation (making up);
  • The deserted spouse did not consent to the desertion; and,
  • The desertion has continued uninterrupted for 12 months.
A lawyer can best help determine whether these elements are present.
Click to expand...
don't know what state you are in but most have similar laws.


dyingeveryday said:
First I must apologize for this lie. When I first came here there was an option for married or not married. In the my heart married applies. In the world this is not true and most would say this. We live together as if married. Her former husband has disappeared for many years now. The issues were irreconcilable. She was faithful and he was not. He left them and there has been no way for divorce. She was not worried about this as she never thought of being married again until we met. Without going into to many details about their marriage, I argue was it even legal or marriage in God's eyes? They were married out of pressure because she was pregnant. They were both young, this was many years ago. At the time they were married at the courthouse, he was high on drugs. When it came time for him to say, "I do" he couldn't even utter the words. He simply said or hummed, mmmhmmmm his eyes closed so high on drugs. The way she describes this day is, "how could anyone even be married that way." yet the judge issued a certificate. I have not felt conviction on being here. In fact I believe it is where I am to be and what I am supposed to do. There is law there is grace. There is man's law. This is a public apology and confession. I am asking for forgiveness.
Click to expand...
why do you ask for forgiveness if you don't feel convicted?

its not us that needs to forgive you but God because its His laws you are breaking. He tells you to not even give the appearance of sin.

I think you should obtain a legal divorce and get married, adopt her child and make a real family in the eyes of the world and not just your own heart.

1 Corinthians 7
[SUP]15 [/SUP]But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.

the above verses says she can remarry because he abandoned her. however marriage is more than a piece of paper or a ceremony. it is an act similar to baptism where you declare to the world that you will join with another before GOD in a covenant that will honor GOD. It is asking God and the world to witness the joining of two souls: heart, body and mind for life.

at least that is what I believe marriage should be.
 
W

Water1944

Guest
#68
#68
in my opinion, it is so pleasing to God to be honest and come clean with others about anything at all in your life. We all sin and make mistakes, and if I had to post all of my mine, it would take me a very very long time. I say this because I'm upset at the posts to you from a senior member just pointing out sin. Well no kidding. I am not on this site to judge others, that is up to God. I'm here to pray and encourage my brothers and sisters in Christ. I feel that it's great that that it was important enough for you to share it. Like others have said, this is between you and God, and I'm very glad you have peace. It's a very unfair situation that just because he can't be found, you have few choices. Praise the Lord for your faith in Him,for your strong healthy relationship,and for the positive words of encouragement from your fellow believers. God bless.
 
RedTent

RedTent

Banned
#69
Oct 31, 2011
8,200
182
0
#69
Kisses1990 said:
^^ Wrong. God allows divorce in certain circumstances. The original poster did not specify what conditions were present. There are some cases where divorce is acceptable. It's not always adultery. If you've been beaten, cheated on, and all sorts of horrible irreconcilable things, then it's ok.

Are you saying if this happened to you, you divorced, God would say NEVER to marry again? Or what if your partner dies? Your forced into being a widow forever?

Why are you avoiding my question on your own reasons for not being baptized? I don't mean to be nosy, but I'm very curious because of what you said in the other post about it could be disrespectful to God. So why haven't you? It seems like a contradiction.

EDIT

I see we agree. I didn't realize you quoted Mathew. So, as it turns out, I was right all along and you were just trying to argue. But we actually agree.

Now I ask you, a woman who was abused and cheated on who gets divorced......they can NEVER marry again?!
Click to expand...
When someone says they are married to someone, and they won't take the extra step of going before the law to announce it, they are just fooling each other. Perhaps in God's eyes the sexual union married them, perhaps they really became one in each others eyes, but it is very suspicious when you refuse the legal uniting.

I really think you are right, that God doesn't want us to live with someone who threatens our life, or refuses to follow through with how God wants marriage. In that case, takes a lot of prayer and forgiveness to allow remarriage. But scripture says that marriage after the death of a partner is fine.
 
W

Water1944

Guest
#70
#70
I disagree, strongly. I am divorced, not by my choice. I believe in God and everything He stands for. I also believed in my marriage and prayed hourly while my ex did drugs, drink, have affairs and lie. I prayed up until and even after, the day I got divorced, for my marriage to be saved and my 3 children to not lose their father. I am at peace. Just as I don't believe you can pick what to believe in the bible, we are sinners. All of us and that is not a excuse to sin or overlook sin. It is up to God to judge us all and He will. I don't see the point of the posts from members who just point out it's sin. It's one thing to disagree with a point of view, but to judge? Well God bless you. I'm here to pray and encourage others. My opinion, for what it's worth.
 
K

Kisses1990

Guest
#71
#71
RedTent said:
When someone says they are married to someone, and they won't take the extra step of going before the law to announce it, they are just fooling each other. Perhaps in God's eyes the sexual union married them, perhaps they really became one in each others eyes, but it is very suspicious when you refuse the legal uniting.

I really think you are right, that God doesn't want us to live with someone who threatens our life, or refuses to follow through with how God wants marriage. In that case, takes a lot of prayer and forgiveness to allow remarriage. But scripture says that marriage after the death of a partner is fine.
Click to expand...

Well again, my situation is that I plan to marry when our parents insurance runs up. That is why we are not in any rush. We already feel married and treat each other accordingly. We are exclusive. We don't see other people. We have all the same responsibilities of marriage and we are there mentally. I think that counts.
 
Elizabeth619

Elizabeth619

Senior Member
#72
Jul 19, 2011
6,397
109
48
#72
Kisses1990 said:
Well again, my situation is that I plan to marry when our parents insurance runs up. That is why we are not in any rush. We already feel married and treat each other accordingly. We are exclusive. We don't see other people. We have all the same responsibilities of marriage and we are there mentally. I think that counts.
Click to expand...
So you say you're married spiritually but not officially so you all can stay on your parents insurance.....?
 
Elizabeth619

Elizabeth619

Senior Member
#73
Jul 19, 2011
6,397
109
48
#73
Matthew 19:4-6
"Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh' ? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."

If your "husband" is still depending on mommy and daddy and you are too then you've violated what Jesus has said.

Looks like youre enjoying the benefits of marriage but not the responsibility.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.