there is no other way to receive it. there is nothing good about what she had to say but MORE IMPORTANTLY THE WAY SHE SAID IT.
i fall in love way too easily
- Thread starter ijustwanttheTruth
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there is no other way to receive it. there is nothing good about what she had to say but MORE IMPORTANTLY THE WAY SHE SAID IT.
excuse me?? why did you have to go and join my list of mortal enemies man, why ya gotta do that. don't be a jerk. i am NOT being a crybaby. wrong is wrong and i will sing it until the cows come home.
Keren, real friends care enough to be totally honest with each other and don't just tell you what you want to hear while ignoring the fact that there is something you really need to hear. Ok, I won't be bothering you again since that's how you see it (nothing but a bother), and I won't be returning to this thread either. You know, its ironic though that your name here is "I just want the truth" because the truth seems to be something you don't really want to hear.
G
guidingfaith13
Guest
i have most certainly found myself in this position.. i feel that for myself its because you want to trust and love everything that the first one that comes along ive fallen head over heals..id really like to believe its just because im so trusting and loving lol.. this kind of heart can be a blessing always but sometimes it feels more of a curse.. which it isnt but sometimes it can feel that way
Just remember to pray the Lord give you guidance through it and for him to show you what the person is all about and maybe you wont fall so easily this post isnt really for advice because im in the same boat but im letting you know im there with you but so is the Lord the Lord falls so madly in Love with us and some of us dont even see it or if they do they dont want him!! when i start to fall for the wrong person i pray the Lord will show me their true heart if you ever need to talk im here 
hahahaha don't take this the wrong way azure....but i think i'm in love with you
Ahahaha XD oh, sister!
I love exactly how you said it! It's so sweet! 
You made my day! Thank you! I love you to bits!! Now, if a certain someone approached me with these words...I'd run to the hills, and at the top of my lungs, i'll SQUEAL my heart out XD
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Oh my...let's not be too hasty, people.
That's the problem. Being too hasty. Even if we don't mean to hurt anyone with what we want to say, and just honestly speak our minds, we should always remember that words are powerful. They could uplift and touch hearts, empower, and even bring someone to life with inspiration. They could also bruise, burn, paralyze, and render hearts cold and dead. I'm sad that this has escalated into something that is making a division here...we should watch out, and not let this create a bigger rift. We should try to solve it now.
Let's reflect on GOD's Words. Let's be reminded, examine ourselves, and be humbled.
[h=3]1 Corinthians 13[/h]King James Version (KJV)
13 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.
3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.
4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
8 Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.
9 For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.
10 But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.
11 When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
12 For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.
13 And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.
Let's answer these questions. What are we in CC for? Why do we engage in fellowship? Who has called us to come together, to edify and share scripture, to sing praises and share our testimony? I don't want to sound self-righteous or holier-than-thou 'coz i am not. But we should remember that we are here because of GOD. And GOD is here in our midst. So we should take care with our words and actions, 'coz HE is watching us always. And when we have conflicts like this, it grieves HIS heart. Fighting amongst ourselves and saying hurtful words...we are not called for this. We are called to love one another, and have a heart for the lost, the confused and the weary, and to reach out to them with love. Our hearts and minds should be filled with love, who is GOD. So our words should be spoken with love.
Even if something is spoken with much truth in it, if it was said in a manner that is unpleasing or offending, it loses its merit. I understand where Keren is coming from. When i read Nod's post, i was taken aback. There are lots of similar posts here at CC with that tone...it shares wisdom, but it's said with a certain arrogance that demeans and belittles other people's thoughts and feelings, even though it's not the writer's intent. Personally, for me, whenever i post something, it's a risk. I am opening myself up, sharing my mind and what's in my heart. For me, it takes courage to speak out, 'coz i'm not just speaking up. I'm giving a part of myself along with my message. For someone to imply that what i'm giving of myself is senseless and pointless, of course i'll be hurt. Add to that an apology that's not well meaning at all...*sigh* Of course, the recipient of that message would be in the defensive. She's no longer just hurt and offended. She's become genuinely angry.
But i'd understand why Nod ended up counter attacking as well. She probably didn't mean to offend, so when she got a negative response, she was caught off guard. And no one really responds positively when they're driven out from any place. She was hurt too, so she lashed out as well.
I know we can't please everybody. It's impossible. I have stopped in my pursuit of that years ago. It only gets me depressed and frustrated when i couldn't make the cut. Instead, i focus on doing what's right, and speaking with much gentleness and sincerity. I'm far from perfect. But thankfully, GOD's grace and guidance is here, and it's more than sufficient to make up for what i lack.
Guys, let's not take sides. It's not helping matters at all. When brethren fight, it's just terrible. I'd know 'coz for a time, i myself had a grave misunderstanding with someone here at CC. Words were spoken out of hurt, irritation and anger...things blew out of proportion. I really cried because of that...really prayed for it, and asked other brethren to pray for it with me as well. The bond is far from restored, but thankfully, healing is currently taking place. It feels terrible to not be ok with someone here at CC, or in any place. When you see, or hear that person's name mentioned...all you could think about are the hurtful exchanges. So you just want to avoid the person...not hear or see anything pertaining to him/her. It's just sad...i'm still praying for this.
Nod and Keren, i pray that things will be peacefully resolved between the two of you. You shouldn't let the sun go down on this without trying to resolve it. I don't want you to go through feelings of coldness and indifference as you encounter each other here at CC...by GOD's grace, i pray for healing for the two of you regarding this matter. I love you, my sisters in Christ.
That's the problem. Being too hasty. Even if we don't mean to hurt anyone with what we want to say, and just honestly speak our minds, we should always remember that words are powerful. They could uplift and touch hearts, empower, and even bring someone to life with inspiration. They could also bruise, burn, paralyze, and render hearts cold and dead. I'm sad that this has escalated into something that is making a division here...we should watch out, and not let this create a bigger rift. We should try to solve it now.
Let's reflect on GOD's Words. Let's be reminded, examine ourselves, and be humbled.
[h=3]1 Corinthians 13[/h]King James Version (KJV)
13 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.
3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.
4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
8 Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.
9 For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.
10 But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.
11 When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
12 For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.
13 And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.
Let's answer these questions. What are we in CC for? Why do we engage in fellowship? Who has called us to come together, to edify and share scripture, to sing praises and share our testimony? I don't want to sound self-righteous or holier-than-thou 'coz i am not. But we should remember that we are here because of GOD. And GOD is here in our midst. So we should take care with our words and actions, 'coz HE is watching us always. And when we have conflicts like this, it grieves HIS heart. Fighting amongst ourselves and saying hurtful words...we are not called for this. We are called to love one another, and have a heart for the lost, the confused and the weary, and to reach out to them with love. Our hearts and minds should be filled with love, who is GOD. So our words should be spoken with love.
Even if something is spoken with much truth in it, if it was said in a manner that is unpleasing or offending, it loses its merit. I understand where Keren is coming from. When i read Nod's post, i was taken aback. There are lots of similar posts here at CC with that tone...it shares wisdom, but it's said with a certain arrogance that demeans and belittles other people's thoughts and feelings, even though it's not the writer's intent. Personally, for me, whenever i post something, it's a risk. I am opening myself up, sharing my mind and what's in my heart. For me, it takes courage to speak out, 'coz i'm not just speaking up. I'm giving a part of myself along with my message. For someone to imply that what i'm giving of myself is senseless and pointless, of course i'll be hurt. Add to that an apology that's not well meaning at all...*sigh* Of course, the recipient of that message would be in the defensive. She's no longer just hurt and offended. She's become genuinely angry.
But i'd understand why Nod ended up counter attacking as well. She probably didn't mean to offend, so when she got a negative response, she was caught off guard. And no one really responds positively when they're driven out from any place. She was hurt too, so she lashed out as well.
I know we can't please everybody. It's impossible. I have stopped in my pursuit of that years ago. It only gets me depressed and frustrated when i couldn't make the cut. Instead, i focus on doing what's right, and speaking with much gentleness and sincerity. I'm far from perfect. But thankfully, GOD's grace and guidance is here, and it's more than sufficient to make up for what i lack.
Guys, let's not take sides. It's not helping matters at all. When brethren fight, it's just terrible. I'd know 'coz for a time, i myself had a grave misunderstanding with someone here at CC. Words were spoken out of hurt, irritation and anger...things blew out of proportion. I really cried because of that...really prayed for it, and asked other brethren to pray for it with me as well. The bond is far from restored, but thankfully, healing is currently taking place. It feels terrible to not be ok with someone here at CC, or in any place. When you see, or hear that person's name mentioned...all you could think about are the hurtful exchanges. So you just want to avoid the person...not hear or see anything pertaining to him/her. It's just sad...i'm still praying for this.
Nod and Keren, i pray that things will be peacefully resolved between the two of you. You shouldn't let the sun go down on this without trying to resolve it. I don't want you to go through feelings of coldness and indifference as you encounter each other here at CC...by GOD's grace, i pray for healing for the two of you regarding this matter. I love you, my sisters in Christ.
@thetruthwanted "...the curse of the lonely"...
I don´t think it a curse, but an opportunity to grow inside out.
I don´t think it a curse, but an opportunity to grow inside out.
M
MissCris
Guest
Pro 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger.
Pro 15:18 A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, But the slow to anger calms a dispute.
Pro 15:23 A man has joy in an apt answer, And how delightful is a timely word!
Pro 15:18 A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, But the slow to anger calms a dispute.
Pro 15:23 A man has joy in an apt answer, And how delightful is a timely word!
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M
motherprayer
Guest
As much as I agree with pieces of your post, I think this came off as quite objectionable and insulting. First, I haven't seen her speak to actually ACTING on these feelings, but just ask if anyone could relate. You could have left out the nastiness and gotten your point across much better. Just saying...
Wait a sec. Sorry to come here as a newbie arguing, but wait just a sec. Love is a CHOICE to be IMPARTIAL and OBJECTIVE.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." There are conscious decisions involved here, and not ones that involve choosing which "love of my life" we marry. It's about choosing to COMMIT to a person for life, even if they misbehave.
I love this post. Aside from the fact that this is very practical advice, it meshes with Scripture beautifully. Great post!
Ya know, I'm not a frequent poster here, just been really a lurker here for awhile, but this thread really set me off. Seriously, the OP reads as someone just trying to get feedback for what they are going through, and responses like this come in? Why though? Smothered to death? Why?
Teach a person how to walk with God, and they will learn how to cope with feelings like this. You can't teach a person to walk with God by telling them you feel smothered to death. And, in fact, if you respond by telling them they're ridiculous, you are actually showing just how NOT capable of teaching them you actually are.
Who knows how to cope with what she's going through? I've gone through the same thing, partially because I have asperger's which makes me lock and load on nearly everyone I meet, male or female.
I apologize to those who have responded kindly, this post was not meant to speak out against them. Just those who were mean.
I have been described by some as a 'confrontational person' ... and I can be ...; however, it is far greater to have heart and understanding for someone ... and show some kind of empathy; ...for to mock them in public and try to make a spectacle of them is not showing love nor empathy ... and indicates a form of 'inverse self-aggrandisement' ... indicating they are somehow better and know better, elevating themselves at anothers expense, whom they are lowering by their words and manner...
If something needs to be criticized, criticise the pattern of thinking or behaviour, and not engage in character assassination at the expense of the person and try and make them look ridiculous...; not when they are opening their heart in public and assume they are communicating with friends who might show some understanding...or at least play with them in a light hearted harmless manner...
...consider the effects words have on others, particularly when they open their heart, trusting others to be their friend...
If something needs to be criticized, criticise the pattern of thinking or behaviour, and not engage in character assassination at the expense of the person and try and make them look ridiculous...; not when they are opening their heart in public and assume they are communicating with friends who might show some understanding...or at least play with them in a light hearted harmless manner...
...consider the effects words have on others, particularly when they open their heart, trusting others to be their friend...
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H
heliza
Guest
i dont agree with u. in my opnion when is the right person, the both parts falling love. if u like someone whow dont care about u is the wrong person
J
Jullianna
Guest
This is a loving response from the heart of a big brother in Christ who knows the person to whom it was directed very well. Thank you for boldly sharing your heart, Gabe. You remind me of Paul, who knew the definition of love, but also knew that truth must sometimes be told boldly with tough love. I know this was difficult for you to write and I pray that thoughtful consideration will be given to it and that at some point it will be accepted in the Spirit in which it was offered.
I
isaria
Guest
True difference having crushes or infatuations or chemistry and deep attraction and even lustful tingles and having a deeper love maybe even with a shadow of them and a wholeness.
As a youngster i had crushes on most men i loved.
Friends and also tutors and all types of good people i felt love for.
I just loved them but may of confused this with another type of love.
I had thoughts of being with a male friend who may not at all had such relation with but in reality was platonic but i dalted on him even motherly some times.
Others i know have had lustful obsessions with people.
Maybe you feeling affectionate and truly want to find some one be intimate with even if it holding hands and cuddling or playing.
maybe that awakens your longing to fall for most men. lol
then another.
maybe you will find a true deeper love wth a man that is astounding to you
As a youngster i had crushes on most men i loved.
Friends and also tutors and all types of good people i felt love for.
I just loved them but may of confused this with another type of love.
I had thoughts of being with a male friend who may not at all had such relation with but in reality was platonic but i dalted on him even motherly some times.
Others i know have had lustful obsessions with people.
Maybe you feeling affectionate and truly want to find some one be intimate with even if it holding hands and cuddling or playing.
maybe that awakens your longing to fall for most men. lol
then another.
maybe you will find a true deeper love wth a man that is astounding to you
I
isaria
Guest
I remember having a loyalty to a man named john.
another man courted me and i always answered "its for john" (my virginity) and marriage.
Years past and i kept loyal to him but he betrayed me year after year time after time and it turned out he was homosexual and left religion and was actually not nice to me.
we were to be engaged.
How many years wasted.
I was so commited and loyal to him and so good to him , sacrificed for him.
his no longer my friend.
not because homosexual but because betrayal and bad behaviours.
Good and respectful for other party to make it clear where they stand instead of use you and lead you along etc.
Hope you will find good relation ship .
God bless.
another man courted me and i always answered "its for john" (my virginity) and marriage.
Years past and i kept loyal to him but he betrayed me year after year time after time and it turned out he was homosexual and left religion and was actually not nice to me.
we were to be engaged.
How many years wasted.
I was so commited and loyal to him and so good to him , sacrificed for him.
his no longer my friend.
not because homosexual but because betrayal and bad behaviours.
Good and respectful for other party to make it clear where they stand instead of use you and lead you along etc.
Hope you will find good relation ship .
God bless.
...what happens is that a warm-blooded type of person, has a hope, and ideal - a desire in their heart, that they so want to experience and know, that when someone gives some indication of an attraction and/or interest --- all those desires and hopes become superimposed on the other person, on some level and in effect --- they become a 'vehicle' for the expression of all those things the person wants, and their heart opens up ...
... its just important to stay centered and level-headed when this sort of thing goes on...
...funny thing happened to me; I was at uni and about to go into class, and a drop-dead gorgeous blonde woman was in there, about 30'ish who noticed me as I chanced my gaze in her direction...I saw her at a bus stop smiling at me, and then looking down...I felt quite overwhelmed --- she was stunning ... I prayed to God that if possible, she approach me in some way...
...the next day, she runs up to me from the class, and asks me for my phone number, and says something about how she felt there was a reason we should meet and talk and hoped I would understand that ... I was blown awayyyyyy....
...we met and started talking, and chatted on the phone, but when she found out I was a Christian and did not agree with the gay lifestyle, she mentioned her best friends were gay and that ended that...
...doesn't happen all the time, but sometimes --- it can totally floor you...
... its just important to stay centered and level-headed when this sort of thing goes on...
...funny thing happened to me; I was at uni and about to go into class, and a drop-dead gorgeous blonde woman was in there, about 30'ish who noticed me as I chanced my gaze in her direction...I saw her at a bus stop smiling at me, and then looking down...I felt quite overwhelmed --- she was stunning ... I prayed to God that if possible, she approach me in some way...
...the next day, she runs up to me from the class, and asks me for my phone number, and says something about how she felt there was a reason we should meet and talk and hoped I would understand that ... I was blown awayyyyyy....
...we met and started talking, and chatted on the phone, but when she found out I was a Christian and did not agree with the gay lifestyle, she mentioned her best friends were gay and that ended that...
...doesn't happen all the time, but sometimes --- it can totally floor you...
If love were impartial and objective, I would not wish to be in a relationship/marriage with anyone, because the amount of love I have for my wife would not be more or less than I have for anyone and everyone. Thats what being impartial means.
Its actually quite partial to the object of its intentions.
Objective vs. Subjective...
Men who make scales of 1-10 are being objective. They see a woman and all come to an objective (agreement) conclusion as to whether or not she is an 8 or a 9 or a 6 or whatever. Its not personal, its Objective. When people pick mates based on objective calculations like how much different people earn for a living, what social standing they have, how objectively attractive they are, how Christian they appear, etc... These are Objectively Verifiable criteria.
This attraction doesn't mean that YOU are attracted to someone, it just means that they are acknowledgebly attractive. Like if you are dating a Model, Pastor, Doctor, Price, etc... You would have an Externally Verifiable Reason to be with them.
Love must be Subjective and Personal. If you are going to marry someone it should be because you love THEM, and if its for something else, it's probably not Love. Real love exists as something which is beyond qualifications. It is to be given simply for its own sake, without consideration to self gain. For if someone is using love to receive love or any other status, material or objective gain, then whatever they are doing is in fact not love. Love does not seek for itself. For to marry someone in consideration of their social standing, is a boost to one's ego, and not love. Love is not prideful. Genuine love is recognizable by this, that its object is without any of the more definite qualifications of difference, which means that this love is recognizable only by love.
As for my comment about being smothered...
"When rashness lives in the heart, a person is quick to discover the multiplicity of sin, then he understands splendidly a fragmentary utterance, hastily comprehends at a distance something scarcely enunciated. When love lives in the heart, a person understands slowly and does not hear at all words said in haste and does not understand them when repeated because he assigns them good position and a good meaning. He does not understand a long angry and insulting verbal assault, because he is waiting for one more word that will give it meaning. When fear lives in the heart, a person easily discovers the multiplicity of sin, discovers deceit and delusion and disloyalty and scheming, discovers that; Every heart is a net, Every rogue like a child, Every promise like a shadow. But the love that hides a multitude of sins is never deceived." -Soren Kierkegaard.
um, how bout especially that i really didn't do or say ANYTHING worth mocking or criticizing. i didn't do anything.
people be crazy.