Need wise guidance

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real1992

Guest
#1
I was touch as a child by my older cousin. its something that i have forgive him and no longer anger towards God or him. I know I was wrong for blaming God, and I have asked him for forgiveness. My cousin sexual assaulted me. physical. although he did not penetrate in me, but has touched me. I was very younger when this happen to me; therefore, I did not know what he was doing(touching me), I knew what he was doing was strange, but never had enough courage to tell my parents. well today I have masturbating problems. every since the assaults, I thought this was natural. As grew i used to do it all the time, but eventually over came it, but now it has started again. I do not do it as much, but still do it once every few weeks. I know its a sin to masturbate and that its a natural thing that people do. I just want to be pure, and strive to be the person i was before i started again.
I do have a good relationship with God, I'm a christian.
masturbating is something I struggle with, and after the acts, i feel will dirty and guilt because I know its wrong.
No my cousin did not masturbate me. Hes just touch me (sexual) which made me uncomfortable.
 
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Bryancampbell

Guest
#2
I'm a guy, so my opinion might be useless. But I'll try!!!! Hey I understand your situation I actually know a lot of people struggling with that exact thing while trying to live a life godly. I would try this, spend time exercising your freedom. First always use the bible when thoughts of sexual pleasure come, but wait, sometimes that might not work. So here how you could exercise it. When the temptation comes and thoughts and such, immeadetly do something else, try praying hard, then reading random verses out of the bible like CRAZY, I'll pray for you!!!! And my friends who face that same problem are girls and boys. So don't worry God sees your heart, and its beautiful no matter what you did or what you do, he will forgive you and accept you for you, just as we all should my sister :)
 
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real1992

Guest
#3
Thanks lol You really made me laugh and feel better. :)
I will defintley tried what you suggest.
I'm still a virgin and never been in a relationship because I do not want to start having sex. So I really want to stop because its (masturbating) is a door way to make you want to start having sex.
 
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kenisyes

Guest
#4
Not everyone agrees masturbation is a sin. There is nothing in the Bible about it. There are those who condemn it based on "self-pleasuring" and "self-indulgence", and, of course the fantasies, if they amount to adultery or fornication, are sinful. But release of tension, and thankfullness for God's preparing you to one day marry and love your spouse and have children, are not sins.
 
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Bluecomet

Guest
#5
God said, man does not have power over his own body except the woman. And woman does not have power over her body except the man.
 

starfield

Senior Member
Jun 13, 2009
3,393
58
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#6
Masturbation is often the symptom of a heart overwhelmed with lustful fantasies, and the bible strongly speaks against lust. You said you feel dirty and guilty after masturbating therefore you are being convicted, your conscience is pricking you, thus you should refrain from it. Try to exercise self-control. Moreover, sexual desire should be satisfied only in the marriage bed - that is between a husband and wife.
 
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Jamjay

Guest
#7
First off,i want u 2 to know that u r doing d right...sin exposed will eventually loose its grip on u.
However,masturbation is a sin bcoz it is a result of d lust in our hearts.
But hey there is grace if u repent(i.e confessing and forsaking them).I know its not easy especially when u've stopped and now u r having a relapse(i know because i've been there) but u must stop focusing on d problem and now focus on d answer which is God(Christ).Find a serious bible believing christian friend and explain to her everything,ask 4 help in prayers and counselling(James 5:13-16).But i urge u as i did b4 dont dwell on ur past...God can help u and His Spirit will teach u to be self-controlled....Tit 2:11-12.
Warning though d urge to av sex will never go away...i alsn av them...but this shows that u r a correct human being,though its not an excuse to entangle ourselves with immorality b4 marriage.But b of good cheer...go to Him(Christ) 4 He cares 4 u.
 

MrHonest

Senior Member
Jan 22, 2012
4,093
4
38
#8
Pray :) and leave the area where you feel that you are most tempted. Growing up is not only thinking you are growing up but behaving in the way that you should: by taking responsibility and not allowing sin its opportunity, take action and The Lord provides the growth. Always pray this is key, communication with our Father. I know your struggle too, its common and it used to be known as, "self-abuse" until some worldly people thought it to be natural for humans to do it.

The struggle will always be there and that is why marriage helps, but marriage is not for that either. It helps me too to see others share their struggles so thank you guys and gals.

Jesus loves us, God bless us :)
 
Feb 5, 2013
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#9
Learn to engage in the spiritual warfare !!! Learn to hit the strongman !!! I believe that spirit that tempts you to do such things was came from the abused that your cousin has committed. This may sound weird to you but this is reality. What is happening to the physical is the result of the spiritual world. Prayer is great tool in defeating the enemies. Claim your authority as a child of God,that thing who oppresses you has no longer legal ground. Rebuke that spirit in the name of Jesus to leave !!!I believe the strongman of your problem is called "perverse spirit". Address his name specifically during spiritual warfare just like this , " you "perverse spirit' ! I command you to leave in the name of Jesus !! and he will surely leave with trembling. When you always hit the strongman , theres always a reaction.
 
May 3, 2013
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#10
We can approach at this as a taboo, as false concerned people, religious "leaders" or humans. There is no way to say God saw Adam alone and gave him a woman (there is not such thing written in the Bible) but reason tells me could have benn so. Beyond that, physically and emotionally, there is a hunger which is affecting old men like me and youth people (society is pushing on this, sometimes, and not for the best, as any beliver knows).

The best could me being married. I beg God to help us sort all me material and spiritual stuff to receive the blessing of marriage.
 
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bracha

Guest
#11
HELLO REAL 1992,HOW ARE YOU TODAY?I AM SO SORRY FOR WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU.YOU HAVE COME A LONG WAY SINCE IT HAPPENED I NOTICED.I THANK GOD FOR THIS.YOU STILL NEED THE STRENGTH AND THE POWER TO LIVE ACCORDING TO GODS WORD FOR YOUR LIFE.I PRAY THAT GOD FILLS YOU WITH HIS SPIRIT AND FRESH OIL FOR THESE BATTLES.YOU HAVE TO KNOW THAT GODS WORD SAYS THAT YOU ARE MORE THAN A CONQUEROR. YOU WILL OVERCOME IT BY HIS GRACE THAT IS MORE THAN ENOUGH FOR YOU.BE STRONG MY SISTER AND SURRENDER MORE TO THE HOLY SPIRIT EVERY DAY.ASK JESUS CHRIST FOR HELP.HE IS ALWAYS PRESENT TO HELP YOU IN YOUR TIMES OF DISTRESS.
 
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4j

Guest
#12
WHAT U NEED IS A TOUCH OF THE HOLY GHOST AND OLD THINGS WILL PASS AWAY2 CORR 5;17
 

Blain

The Word Weaver
Aug 28, 2012
19,752
2,836
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#13
WHAT U NEED IS A TOUCH OF THE HOLY GHOST AND OLD THINGS WILL PASS AWAY2 CORR 5;17
Someone tak his caps lock key please or his shift button. Real1992 I am sorry for all you went through and maybe masturbating may be wrong but luckily we can work through it together. if you ever need help Pm me or something
 
Sep 8, 2012
4,367
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#14
It's covered under the blood of Jesus Christ.
Find a fellowship of others in your situation.
Jesus lived a perfect life and suffered the worst sinner's death to be right where you are now, to help you, to save you from all the stuff that happened to you, and that you go through daily.
It's not your fault. It wasn't His either.
Find a ministry for victims of sexual crimes.
Be ministered to, and minister to others.
Jesus will work through you and the others. All the time, every time.
- To the healing of your soul.
 
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Mammachickadee

Guest
#15
Not everyone agrees masturbation is a sin. There is nothing in the Bible about it. There are those who condemn it based on "self-pleasuring" and "self-indulgence", and, of course the fantasies, if they amount to adultery or fornication, are sinful. But release of tension, and thankfullness for God's preparing you to one day marry and love your spouse and have children, are not sins.
The Bible does say it is wrong for a man to wastefully spill his seed, doesn't it? Says nothing about women, though... quite possibly because women didn't always get sex when they wanted it.
 
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kenisyes

Guest
#16
Where is that verse? Women do not have a choice. Their egg comes out unless it becomes a fetus. And hurts a lot when it does.
 
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Mammachickadee

Guest
#17
Is Masturbation even a sin? Acts 17:11 Archive: Masturbation, What Does the Bible Say?
Overwhelming answer is... it depends on the conditions. If you are indulging in fantasy then, obviously, masturbation is a sin. If you just can't seem to relax because all this sexual energy is just pend up? (and that is pretty common, especially for nymphomanics that are simply wired that way) If one can masturbate while avoiding sexual sin then the physical act of sexual maintenance is not a sin. It can actually assist in chemical balance.
 
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kenisyes

Guest
#19
One at a time, referring to the material in the link.

Genesis: Onan's crime was disoberying his father for whom to sex with.
Leviticus: Just because the man is unclean until evening (I wonder what that means if he had sex in evening with his wife and spilled some), does not speak to the wateful element.
Psalm: There is no proof that masturbating reduces your ability to have children. It may even increase it.
Galatians only applies if masturbation "gratifies" a desire. It may be like eating or sleeping, necessary for some.

We tend to ignore in this regard, that Jesus teaches that people are created with different needs for sexual release (Matt. 19:12). if these differences are physical, it may explain the difference we see in theologies on the subject.
 
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kenisyes

Guest
#20
Is Masturbation even a sin? Acts 17:11 Archive: Masturbation, What Does the Bible Say?
Overwhelming answer is... it depends on the conditions. If you are indulging in fantasy then, obviously, masturbation is a sin. If you just can't seem to relax because all this sexual energy is just pend up? (and that is pretty common, especially for nymphomanics that are simply wired that way) If one can masturbate while avoiding sexual sin then the physical act of sexual maintenance is not a sin. It can actually assist in chemical balance.
Thank you for an excellent article and summary. This is how I believe it as well. I have counselled some young people who could not even imagine that others required sinful fantasies to deal with sexual tension. I really think there is an individual element to it, as you say, "wired" that way.