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B
I am not sure. If I was married I would submit to my husband because the bible says wives are to submit to their husbands. Ephesians 5:22-23 For wives this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the savior of his body, the church. NLT
S
Hi, I am not married, but am at an age where I view my friends' and families' marriages. I just wish they could follow the plan for the home laid out in Epheisans 5 and could act like the young men and women are to act in Titus 2:4-7. I have heard that women need love and men the respect that comes with submission. If the man loves his wife like himself, he will choose actions his wife will want to submit to. I believe that they will be united as they are not two anymore but one. I asked my mother about why marriages fail and she said it is selfishness. I believe she is right. The devil gets us desiring things that are not good and to focus more on "me" and not on "us". Then spouses stop fulfilling their roles and responsibilities to each other and as parents. For example, in a clock or other machine, if any cog in a wheel gets bent out of shape, the whole machine doesn't work well and is affected. I think the problem is sin and we just don't want to obey God Who knows best and so gave us rules to follow in marriage and life as He loves us and wants the best for us in marriage or any other area--work, decisions, etc. That too is why sexual promiscuity and deviations are on the rise. People decide they want something other than God's plan. Only His plan works properly, after all He is our Creator.
H
Man, this was the HARDEST lesson I've had to learn in my Christian walk. I'm a very independant woman, stubborn, willful, and I hate not being in control. All my life I dated guys who I could boss around and who would just do what I told them without question. In essence, I wanted to be the one "wearing the pants". And after a couple of months, I would be bored with them because they were usually very weak-willed. Something just never clicked in any of the relationships I was in. Half the reason I wanted to date weak-willed men is because I was scared. I was scared that I would give someone control over me, and give them a chance to hurt me. I gave my heart up once, and the guy I gave it to destroyed it when I was at a very young age.
Then, one day, I met a man who made me feel safe, secure, and loved, and who I had no problems trusting. I no longer wanted to "wear the pants" but trusted in his leadership. I married that man. He's full of integrity, and treats me with respect. Submitting to him is not a problem like it used to be with all the other guys. But it's because we have respect, trust, and love. Now that I have someone I know isn't going to hurt me, isn't going to demand things from me I don't think are right, and who has proven himself as a person I want to follow, being a submissive wife is easy.
Too often we see people married for all the wrong reasons. People marry people they don't trust, they don't respect, and don't allow God into their relationship. God set up a household perfectly, and when we start following his rules, the happiness falls in naturally. There is no arguing or bickering between me and my husband. When something happens, we discuss it. He loves me enough to get my input and to see what I would like before he makes a decision, and I trust his judgement and leadership as head of my household that whatever he decides, I support. He doesn't "exert authority" "boss me around" or otherwise use my submissiveness to harm or hurt me. We work together as a team, supporting each other the way God intended.
The roles are simple. Men, love your wives like Christ loved his church, and women submit to your husbands as you do the Lord. Does that mean women should be in the kitchen all day and do all the house cleaning and do all the cooking while the husband sits around and watches tv? I don't believe that at all. Does that mean men should make all the decisions in the household and never consult their wife? No. It means loving your wife enough to includer her in all that you do and chose, and in return, women, trust your husbands to make the right choice, even if it's not the choice you would have made yourself.
God's rules in marriage are all about love, respect, and order. When you allow Him into your relationship, it's amazing how smoothly things run.
Then, one day, I met a man who made me feel safe, secure, and loved, and who I had no problems trusting. I no longer wanted to "wear the pants" but trusted in his leadership. I married that man. He's full of integrity, and treats me with respect. Submitting to him is not a problem like it used to be with all the other guys. But it's because we have respect, trust, and love. Now that I have someone I know isn't going to hurt me, isn't going to demand things from me I don't think are right, and who has proven himself as a person I want to follow, being a submissive wife is easy.
Too often we see people married for all the wrong reasons. People marry people they don't trust, they don't respect, and don't allow God into their relationship. God set up a household perfectly, and when we start following his rules, the happiness falls in naturally. There is no arguing or bickering between me and my husband. When something happens, we discuss it. He loves me enough to get my input and to see what I would like before he makes a decision, and I trust his judgement and leadership as head of my household that whatever he decides, I support. He doesn't "exert authority" "boss me around" or otherwise use my submissiveness to harm or hurt me. We work together as a team, supporting each other the way God intended.
The roles are simple. Men, love your wives like Christ loved his church, and women submit to your husbands as you do the Lord. Does that mean women should be in the kitchen all day and do all the house cleaning and do all the cooking while the husband sits around and watches tv? I don't believe that at all. Does that mean men should make all the decisions in the household and never consult their wife? No. It means loving your wife enough to includer her in all that you do and chose, and in return, women, trust your husbands to make the right choice, even if it's not the choice you would have made yourself.
God's rules in marriage are all about love, respect, and order. When you allow Him into your relationship, it's amazing how smoothly things run.
H
As a society we've pushed God out in the name of logic, science, and progressiveness. And while I do believe women and men should be equal in the eyes of the state and that women should have the same rights and priviledges as men, the traditions of man don't always translate well into Christianity. We are all children of God, and are all equal in his eyes, but he simply gave us different roles. Women can have babies and men can write their names in the snow with their pee. It doesn't make one better than the other, and we can't switch those qualities up. Just because a woman is meant to submit to her husband, does't make her less than her husband. Jesus said the master is no better than his servant. Unfortunately a lot of women think being submissive means being weak, and let me tell you, it takes a STRONG woman to be submissive. The laws and logic of men aren't always the laws and logic of God, so we should definately separate the two.
My view on the role of a husband is that he should be 1. Best Friend of his Wife 2. Provider of his family 3. Loving Role model for his children 4. Consoler and primary caretaker of his families needs 5. etc.
It is not of my character to verbally tell the roles of others, however, and I don't like using the word role toward anyone other than myself. The best I could hope for is a loving and caring wife, a good mother to the children, and children with pure well intentioned hearts. I think it would be wrong, and also rude, to tell her her role. But I couldn't imagine marrying a person that would even need to be told what to do. I hold the intelligence of a person to high regard.
It is not of my character to verbally tell the roles of others, however, and I don't like using the word role toward anyone other than myself. The best I could hope for is a loving and caring wife, a good mother to the children, and children with pure well intentioned hearts. I think it would be wrong, and also rude, to tell her her role. But I couldn't imagine marrying a person that would even need to be told what to do. I hold the intelligence of a person to high regard.
A
When i first post this thread i had no idea that it would of gotten so much respond, but hey keep them coming am enjoying reading every ones answer especially you Harley angel many thing that u have said on how u was in ur past relationship was always how I felt like i had to be in control like it was always my way or nothing i felt like there will never be any man to come in my life to take control of me.Ever since i got marriage i realized that the way that i behave and believe that the way I ran thing was good but it was not what God had for me as a wife to act .My husband and i fought for leadership position almost everyday and i always had my chest puff up and i always would say "I am Woman hear me Roar" wow!!!! was i living in a fanatic land. Now that i am save everything is running so smooth thanks to God's salvation. But i still suffer now and again because of how i live like that for so long and i really did believe that. But i still need allot more work on me so ppl keep me and my family in pray.But may God get all the Praise because of this post that is up. Thank u all
H
I understand ANewCreature. As women we've had to fight for a lot of things in our lives. For the most part, we are still challenged by the world when it comes to leadership positions. The lift of oppression against women is still a young idea, and we weren't raised like our greatgrandma's to be the submissive stay at home wives. We've been challenged since birth to be more, to be better, to get our educations, to take control of our lives. But it's kind of refreshing to know that we don't have to be in control of everything in our lives, that we can relax a litle and trust someone else to take care of us, whether it's God or our husband. Being a military wife, I've got an extremely hard role because while my husband is gone, I also have to be leader of my household, and relinquishing that power, those decisions back to him when he returns from his trips is hard sometimes because I've been doing it "my way" for so long.
I'm glad you were able to find salvation and find more peace in your marriage. The biggest thing to remember is trust. If you loved the man enough to marry him, you should be able to trust him enough to be the leader of your household. And if you find that hard, trust that God will be in his heart, guiding him. As wives, we have the easy part. We are called to submit to our husbands like we do the Lord. ANd since as Christians, we already submit to God, we know how to submit to our husbands. Our husbands on the other hand are called to love us like CHRIST loved the church lol. Those are some BIG shoes to fill. That's why our husbands need our support, not our competition.
I'm glad you were able to find salvation and find more peace in your marriage. The biggest thing to remember is trust. If you loved the man enough to marry him, you should be able to trust him enough to be the leader of your household. And if you find that hard, trust that God will be in his heart, guiding him. As wives, we have the easy part. We are called to submit to our husbands like we do the Lord. ANd since as Christians, we already submit to God, we know how to submit to our husbands. Our husbands on the other hand are called to love us like CHRIST loved the church lol. Those are some BIG shoes to fill. That's why our husbands need our support, not our competition.
J
Our educational system and what they feed our children in public school is partically to blame for the destruction of the family and traditional roles. Parents who are both working do not have the time to know what their children are being taught. That was deliberately planned by our world governments as the womens liberation movemen was funded by Rockerfeller, member of the New World Order especially for that purpose. I have some grandchildren that attend a wonderful Christian school that truly teaches them the word of God and the teachers are serious believers. Unfortunately, most of us do not have the money to have the ability to put our children into higher education that teaches them godly values. When schools are attacked by students with guns and kids killed, people will ask, "where was God when this happened"? Well, God can answer and say, I could not be there because you put me out of schools by removing school prayer.
Also, the economy being so bad is another way that satan is making sure that both parents are gone and have to work. I was blessed with a husband, even though he had severe problems at first, he insisted that I stay home and raise the children. To me, it is a blessing to stay at home and be a keeper of the house. I love to cook and clean also and that made my husband happy to come home and have a clean house and a nice home cooked meal. Even with four children, I was able to do that. I could take all four of my children to the grocery store and not have any of them throw tantrums and shame me in public. We could take them out to dinner with us and strangers would comment on how well behaved our four small children were. Today, the system intimidates and threatens parents to correct them in the way the bible teaches. That is why I see young children today with horrible behavior is because they are not disiplined.
Men are to work and support the family and women are to be keepers of the home and love their husbands and love their children. Because that traditional role has been torn down by satan and leaders in government who are bringing in the New World Order, keeping us in fear of swine flu and wars and other worldy concerns can take our eyes off Jesus.
Also, the economy being so bad is another way that satan is making sure that both parents are gone and have to work. I was blessed with a husband, even though he had severe problems at first, he insisted that I stay home and raise the children. To me, it is a blessing to stay at home and be a keeper of the house. I love to cook and clean also and that made my husband happy to come home and have a clean house and a nice home cooked meal. Even with four children, I was able to do that. I could take all four of my children to the grocery store and not have any of them throw tantrums and shame me in public. We could take them out to dinner with us and strangers would comment on how well behaved our four small children were. Today, the system intimidates and threatens parents to correct them in the way the bible teaches. That is why I see young children today with horrible behavior is because they are not disiplined.
Men are to work and support the family and women are to be keepers of the home and love their husbands and love their children. Because that traditional role has been torn down by satan and leaders in government who are bringing in the New World Order, keeping us in fear of swine flu and wars and other worldy concerns can take our eyes off Jesus.
H
Amen Jezreel. I love what you said about the system intimidating and threatening parents over how they correct their child. With the rise of women working, which isn't a bad thing, we see a lot more children being put into day cares and babysitting where they don't get the order and authority and discipline they need. So, when mom and dad come home, tired from work, they don't want to punish tantrums, they just give the kid whatever they want to shut up. Plus, if you openly discipline your child in public, you've suddenly become the worst parent ever and are a child abuser! Psh, my mom broke a wooden spoon on my butt when I said "crap" and I turned out just fine. In fact, I didn't do a LOT of things as a kid I knew were wrong because my parents ALWAYS found out about it and I was ALWAYS punished for it.
I know that was off topic, but I just thought what Jezreel said was so true.
I know that was off topic, but I just thought what Jezreel said was so true.
A
OK i have other question with the other ones that i have ask
Why is it that this scripture verse Titus 2:3-5 not begin impilted in church anymore?
I feel like what Jezreel said i agree 100%, but the church is also at fault as well because these thing are not in played in some churches. I feel like many of these Churches are focusing on the wrong things when then need to focus on the marriage in the churches, the family and are soul instead of worrying bout a bigger church building how much members they have than other church or how much money your putting into the offering pan etc....What do u think my brothers and sister i especially would love to hear Jezreel wise input on this.
Titus 2:3-5 " Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips, nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may train the younger women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be self-controlled, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.
Why is it that this scripture verse Titus 2:3-5 not begin impilted in church anymore?
I feel like what Jezreel said i agree 100%, but the church is also at fault as well because these thing are not in played in some churches. I feel like many of these Churches are focusing on the wrong things when then need to focus on the marriage in the churches, the family and are soul instead of worrying bout a bigger church building how much members they have than other church or how much money your putting into the offering pan etc....What do u think my brothers and sister i especially would love to hear Jezreel wise input on this.
Titus 2:3-5 " Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips, nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may train the younger women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be self-controlled, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.
H
I think the biggest problem with that is we don't have traditional families anymore. Our grandparents don't live wtih us anymore, they live alone until they die, or go to retirement homes. We don't respect our elders like we used to. I know in my church, it was mostly older ladies, and i loved them to pieces! They were spunky, and sweet, and fun, and everything I wanted to be when I grew up. It's just nowadays, a lot of women don't join the church until they are older and already married and set in their ways. Youngsters are far and few between so there are fewer younger ladies for the older ladies to share their wisdom with. But think, a lot of our traditions are given to us by our mothers. Most women when they get married will act however they saw their mothers act in a relationship (for the most part). They will cook the same foods, probably have the same cleaning methods, and handle situations in a similiar pattern. That's why it's important for mothers and grandmothers and older members of the church to lead by example. It's hard for a mother who doesn't submit to her husband to teach her daughter to submit. It's sort of a monkey see, monkey do type of thing. If you grew up watching your mother be happy in her relationship with your father, be a good, supportive, submissive wife, and enjoy God in her life, it'll be easier for YOU to do it when it's your turn because you've seen it, you've seen how it works and you've grown up learning how to do it. That's why it's sooooo important for older women to be role models.
C
I was having a conversation with a guy the other day. We were talking about spending and saving money. He was telling me he was planning on saving money so he could buy a house. I replied that I wish I were disciplined enough with money to be able to do that. He encouraged me by telling me that I would be able to one day. Then I said yeah, when I get married and my husband tells me 'No, you can not spend that money we need to save.' So I say all that to say this: He was shocked by that, his response was 'You would not let a man tell you what to do like that would you?' It kind of threw me off, because yes if I were married and my husband thought we shouldn't spend money on something of course I would obey. Isn't that what I am suppose to do? Him, being a Christian man thought it would be wrong if I obeyed my husband....I don't think it is just women who are chaning the roles.