All you single men out there. Kill the lust! Let's sharpen some Iron.

[Grace-Like-Rain]

Well, in the Old Testament, sometimes your wife's handmaid would... ummm... well... ya know.

Anyway... hardly any girls come equipped with a handmaid anymore.

Gee, I can't imagine why...

 

[maxwel]

Gee, I can't imagine why...

Whenever I meet a girl, she will invariably, at some point, stop the conversation to ask what I do for a living.
I then stop the conversation to ask if she has a handmaid.

: )

 

[Jullianna]

Lord, I thank you for these men who are seeing Your face in this way. Please bless their efforts and use their group to change the lives of many men who visit here.

 

[ServantStrike]

Only the new mothers are too tired. The father is never too tired. And the baby is wide awake.

So it's Zao's November challenge again times 2.

Well then so be it. Wait until January gentlemen, I have an even bigger challenge.

A war-on-lust movie would be great! Swords and guns and other weapons. I'm thinking an action-packed psychological thriller. Introspective but not art-house. None of this "Fireproof" stuff.

I know the the uniforms for the protagonists too! And there would be multiple protagonists, and like, right in the middle of a gunfight they would start praying together.


[SUP]10 [/SUP]Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. [SUP]11 [/SUP]Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. [SUP]12 [/SUP]For our struggle is not against [SUP][e][/SUP]flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. [SUP]13 [/SUP]Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. [SUP]14 [/SUP]Stand firm therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, [SUP]15 [/SUP]and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; [SUP]16 [/SUP][SUP][f][/SUP]in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. [SUP]17 [/SUP]And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

Lord, I thank you for these men who are seeing Your face in this way. Please bless their efforts and use their group to change the lives of many men who visit here.

Some of you ladies have already started pointing out to us posts we missed where guys are struggling. So, you guys are helping too . Just keep doing what you're doing, and thank you for the prayers.


And gentlemen, I still see some of you posting in here that haven't joined in on the discussion. Come, join us!

 

[Enow]

No, no. Not in terms of showing the images or anything like that, but the real, honest struggle men have with lust. Also, they should ditch the Hallmark lighting, while they're at it.

It seems cartoons are better adapt in showing the obviousness when a character is lusting like a wolf panting with his heart animating out of his chest and his tongue flying around out of his mouth or his drooling tongue touching the ground with his eyes bulging out of his eye-sockets.

Makes me wonder just how much the world's media is programming kids on how they are to act towards the opposite sex. E

Even the "Bambi" movie has that moment as if the male animals are struck dumb by some vision of beauty.

Does that influence little girls to look for that kind of a response as well as if that means love at first sight or something? Does that program the girls into thinking that they are to be captivating by their looks or they will never find true love?

Sometimes, even rated G movies should be supervised by discerning christian parents so as to be present to inform that what they are seeing is not an actual sign of true love, and that we are not to judge or to accept a person based on their outward public appealing appearance.

Emerson said character is above intellect... but it should also be said character is above beauty.

God did say this: Proverbs 31:30Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

Getting back to our men talk: pride of life can also be a trigger as a provision for the flesh to fulfill the lusts thereof.

Some men seek "trophy wives", but little do "good-looking" men see themselves as trophies as well, until an accident that scars them or their spouses, and then the "love" is no longer there... at least.. not as it was before.

Christians get persecuted in other countries. but I believe we are persecuted in this country by having our guard down in what the media is feeding us. Christians in persecuted countries are more likely to be alert & aware of their surroundings whereas christians that are actually persecuted here and yet unaware are liken to a lobster in a slowly boiling pot.

So I am not sure how one can really show the inner struggles of a believer with lust when sometimes, when lust is not recognized when it has its foot in the door with the pride of life.

2 Corinthians 10:[SUP]4 [/SUP](For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds [SUP]5 [/SUP]Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ; [SUP]6 [/SUP]And having in a readiness to revenge all disobedience, when your obedience is fulfilled. [SUP]7 [/SUP]Do ye look on things after the outward appearance? if any man trust to himself that he is Christ's, let him of himself think this again, that, as he is Christ's, even so are we Christ's.

So how can men guard against that which women cater towards in public sex appeal of the pride of life?

1 Timothy 2:[SUP]9 [/SUP]In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; [SUP]10 [/SUP]But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.

1 Peter 3:Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; [SUP]2 [/SUP]While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. [SUP]3 [/SUP]Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; [SUP]4 [/SUP]But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. [SUP]5 [/SUP]For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: [SUP]6 [/SUP]Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

Seems like neither the women nor the men are recognizing the battle that is set before us.

 

[ServantStrike]

Enow, you have Got to join us in the men's discussion. I'm sending you an invite.


And I think that you're dead on. Society has trained women to want to grow up and look like some very unrealistic standards, while it has also trained men to look for those unrealistic standards.

Feminism just throws a further wrench in the works as it then tells women this blame rests squarely on men and that men need to bend over backwards to atone for their mistakes.

We're so screwed up, there are now women who argue that pornography is a natural extension of feminism as it takes back control from men... except it feeds depravity and makes men look for other surgically altered candidates.

 

[Enow]

Enow, you have Got to join us in the men's discussion. I'm sending you an invite.


And I think that you're dead on. Society has trained women to want to grow up and look like some very unrealistic standards, while it has also trained men to look for those unrealistic standards.

Feminism just throws a further wrench in the works as it then tells women this blame rests squarely on men and that men need to bend over backwards to atone for their mistakes.

We're so screwed up, there are now women who argue that pornography is a natural extension of feminism as it takes back control from men... except it feeds depravity and makes men look for other surgically altered candidates.

Thanks for the invite. I have participated in some of the topics there since that invite. Hopefully, and God be willing, I shall be able to keep track of the discussions to keep up.

 

[ServantStrike]

Thanks for the invite. I have participated in some of the topics there since that invite. Hopefully, and God be willing, I shall be able to keep track of the discussions to keep up.

Brother, you're a bible quoting man of God in those discussions..

You are very handy with that sword of the spirit

 

[Enow]

Brother, you're a bible quoting man of God in those discussions..

You are very handy with that sword of the spirit

I have only Jesus Christ as my Good Shepherd to thank for that as He is providing me the words I need through the Holy Spirit within me.

Romans 12:3For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.

1 Corinthians 3:[SUP]5 [/SUP]Who then is Paul, and who is Apollos, but ministers by whom ye believed, even as the Lord gave to every man? [SUP]6 [/SUP]I have planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase. [SUP]7 [/SUP]So then neither is he that planteth any thing, neither he that watereth; but God that giveth the increase.

I am suffering what I believe to be a messsenger of Satan that is buffetting me in the flesh as Paul was so that others will not think highly than they ought to think of me as they were to do the same with Paul.

2 Corinthians 12:[SUP]7 [/SUP]And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure. [SUP]8 [/SUP]For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me. [SUP]9 [/SUP]And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. [SUP]10 [/SUP]Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.

At any rate, it is God that ministers and He can use anybody He so desires.

 

[ServantStrike]

Well, since Zao can do it, so can I.

I just posted a very public blog post about very private matters earlier (err yesterday, I guess I really am up late). It took me this long to get the confidence to put it up. This one is about the male uhm, drive. It's not nearly complete enough. I want moe scientific (or maybe even pseudo scientific) data.

But, whatever is happening is working. More and more of you guys are showing up to the chat group and it feels good to see you guys sharing your struggles, and more importantly, your victories!

We're starting to see some who are free of these issues joining in the discussion too, which is really cool.

 

[Donkeyfish07]

Everything constructive I have to say is already posted on the young adults version of this thread...........to get a little deeper into the issue though......I don't really know what to say to men that have a serious problem with this issue other than "get rid of the porn at all costs". Reason being, how do you give healthy...biblical advice when you have the following things to think about.


Celibacy is the only "acceptable" thing to tell Christian men when it comes to how they should relate to the opposite sex before marriage. Even porn addicts will tell you no porn is a good thing so they're on the same page there, and you can tell them no fap is healthy for them as well (Which I personally believe is true, especially if they have a pornography addiction).....But, telling guys no sex, no fap, and no porn......that's not advice that any young man I know can follow in the real world.....If you want to be honest and drop the "Christiany image" around the issue.

Unless you want to tell them to grab the first girl they find and get married, what can you really say to them? I think encouraging people to get a real girlfriend and have intimacy with her would probably be the healthiest thing to tell them, but we can't be doing that now can we? I think it's far preferable when the other option is having guys stare at a screen all day and never having any real human intimacy/connection..........but that goes against the celibacy paradigm we have going on.

What say you men/women about that? What IS good, biblical advice here....that's also practical? I don't know the answer to that question.

 

[Enow]

What say you men/women about that? What IS good, biblical advice here....that's also practical? I don't know the answer to that question.

This Psalm is usually read at the funerals, but it is for the living of why we should lean on the Lord all the time in trusting Him.

Psalm 23:1The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. [SUP]2 [/SUP]He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. [SUP]3 [/SUP]He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. [SUP]4 [/SUP]Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. [SUP]5 [/SUP]Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. [SUP]6 [/SUP]Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

 

[Richie_2uk]

Not all Single men lust. Also not All single men are on CC. So how this message going to reach them?

 

[Enow]

Not all Single men lust. Also not All single men are on CC. So how this message going to reach them?

What about the pride of life? The love of the Father is not in that also. That is in the world, and not just lust.

Preaching Jesus Christ & Him crucified is the only way to reach anyone with the Good News. Discipleship comes afterwards.

 

[ServantStrike]

Celibacy is the only "acceptable" thing to tell Christian men when it comes to how they should relate to the opposite sex before marriage. Even porn addicts will tell you no porn is a good thing so they're on the same page there, and you can tell them no fap is healthy for them as well (Which I personally believe is true, especially if they have a pornography addiction).....But, telling guys no sex, no fap, and no porn......that's not advice that any young man I know can follow in the real world.....If you want to be honest and drop the "Christiany image" around the issue.

Unless you want to tell them to grab the first girl they find and get married, what can you really say to them? I think encouraging people to get a real girlfriend and have intimacy with her would probably be the healthiest thing to tell them, but we can't be doing that now can we? I think it's far preferable when the other option is having guys stare at a screen all day and never having any real human intimacy/connection..........but that goes against the celibacy paradigm we have going on.

What say you men/women about that? What IS good, biblical advice here....that's also practical? I don't know the answer to that question.

I say those young men aren't trying hard enough, or they're trying too hard and not relying on Christ.

They need to live in the spirit and not in the flesh.

Phillipians 4:
12I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. 13I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

1 Corintihians 10
[SUP]13 [/SUP]No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.

Ephesians 4
17So this I say, and affirm together with the Lord, that you walk no longer just as the Gentiles also walk, in the futility of their mind, 18being darkened in their understanding, excluded from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, because of the hardness of their heart; 19and they, having become callous, have given themselves over to sensuality for the practice of every kind of impurity with greediness. 20But you did not learn Christ in this way, 21if indeed you have heard Him and have been taught in Him, just as truth is in Jesus, 22that, in reference to your former manner of life, you lay aside the old self, which is being corrupted in accordance with the lusts of deceit, 23and that you be renewed in the spirit of your mind, 24and put on the new self, which in the likeness of God has been created in righteousness and holiness of the truth.

No temptation has overtaken us except that which is common to man. That means that others have overcome it before us, and others will after us, and so can we.

Not all Single men lust. Also not All single men are on CC. So how this message going to reach them?

That reasoning seems a bit circular to me.

I mean of course not all men lust, not all men on CC lust, and this message cannot possibly reach all men, but is it not a good thing to try and reach those we can? This group's purpose wasn't to reach the entire world, but to start with the CCers that are struggling.

If enough people in enough different places tackle the issue then awareness will have been raised. As long as those who are freed are sure to raise awareness, then they will help free others. It's no different than mission work. No one missionary can get the word out to everyone in the world in a lifetime (or even 100 lifetimes). But with enough of them, and enough of the newly saved getting word out, then the good news will be preached to all the corners of the Earth (and not I don't say it will be accepted, just that it will have been heard).


And this group isn't just for the broken, but the whole. It is good to see those who are strong in Christ help those who are weak.

 

[Tintin]

Not all Single men lust. Also not All single men are on CC. So how this message going to reach them?

Really? Are they human? Because I'm pretty sure everyone (teens and older) struggles with lust to some degree. Some of us just struggle far more than others.

 

[OGM]

There is sexual attraction and then there is lust. Different...but related.

 

[Tintin]

Yes, but to say that sexual attraction can't very easily lead to lust (in our fallen world) is foolish.

 

[KJV15John11]

Yes, but to say that sexual attraction can't very easily lead to lust (in our fallen world) is foolish.

All it takes is the willingness to nurture the attraction.

Does anyone feel that it must be difficult to keep your attraction strictly contained when you are single, but then be expected to let it run free with your wife after so many years of constraint?

Does the longer you're single make it easier to control lust?

Is it harder to prevent sexual attraction turning into lust if you have been married before where you had sex?

 

[ServantStrike]

All it takes is the willingness to nurture the attraction.

Does anyone feel that it must be difficult to keep your attraction strictly contained when you are single, but then be expected to let it run free with your wife after so many years of constraint?

Does the longer you're single make it easier to control lust?

Is it harder to prevent sexual attraction turning into lust if you have been married before where you had sex?

I think it makes it harder. I can't speak for sex, but pornography has warped my mind to be... not as pure as it would have been. I don't look at it now but, sometimes that junk will come back up in your head at inopportune times. I think it would be more difficult still if actual sex had ever occurred

And it would probably feel strange to be married, but only somewhat. The way I see it, you still have to keep your defenses up whenever you are not with your wife, so you never really stop fighting your flesh. You do get that outlet with your wife though. Provided you're with her only I don't see how it's wrong to let your eyes wander, because then they really aren't wandering.

Of course, if you were Godly during courtship a future wife is going to wonder where all the sexual stuff came from after you got married. I wonder if "well I was keeping it in" is a valid excuse, or if women start to look at their husbands as dirty old men who lied to them lol.