SINGLE AND HAPPY...ZIT POSSIBLE?
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I don't really know about the first question because I have never really felt that way as a single other than brief times after breakups. It may have some part to do with how our societies portray a 'good life.' I'm sure part of it too is the innate desire to bond and have a family.
As for me, I think I have always been a bit of a lone wolf. When not alone, I value having very deep relationships with people. I think this has helped me greatly in that I have a few really close friends whom I talk to every day. In addition to this, I was raised by an amazing Christian family that was very involved in the church. I have a great desire to serve, and being single you have plenty of time to be able to serve. I'm able to spend time helping my church and can do so without needing a lot of pre-planning.
Beyond that, I spend time with my family, working on projects of my own, playing games.... I have no shortage of hope, excitement, sacrifice, pain, love. In the end, God told me quite clearly that for now at least He is going to use my singleness for His gain. For me, it is the greatest comfort of anything.
So, I can't answer the question for everyone, or for you really, but there is a lot of happiness that iI have found in the single life.
God Bless, and Merry Christmas!
As for me, I think I have always been a bit of a lone wolf. When not alone, I value having very deep relationships with people. I think this has helped me greatly in that I have a few really close friends whom I talk to every day. In addition to this, I was raised by an amazing Christian family that was very involved in the church. I have a great desire to serve, and being single you have plenty of time to be able to serve. I'm able to spend time helping my church and can do so without needing a lot of pre-planning.
Beyond that, I spend time with my family, working on projects of my own, playing games.... I have no shortage of hope, excitement, sacrifice, pain, love. In the end, God told me quite clearly that for now at least He is going to use my singleness for His gain. For me, it is the greatest comfort of anything.
So, I can't answer the question for everyone, or for you really, but there is a lot of happiness that iI have found in the single life.
God Bless, and Merry Christmas!
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It is all about your focus. If one is focused on getting married and whatnot, they will find single life miserable. However, if one is focused on the Lord, then any season, single or married, is a blessing, for then you are seeking the Lord and His will, and everything else is noise. 
I am single, always have been, and I love it. I have never had a boyfriend...I feel that my life is rich due to this, as I do not have past 'loves' to worry about springing up if I ever marry.
I am single, always have been, and I love it. I have never had a boyfriend...I feel that my life is rich due to this, as I do not have past 'loves' to worry about springing up if I ever marry.
I'm single and happy. It took awhile to attain this peace, however, now the Lord would have to hit me over the head with a spiritual two by four before I would allow a man into my life. Jesus and I have already got a good thing going. I don't want anything to disrupt that. The only way I would allow a man in my life is if Jesus made it very clear that this was the one. In the meantime, if it never happens, I'm perfectly content with that.
R
I love being Single! I'm not miserable. Just happy I'm not in a relationship or marriage. And guess what? it's my choice to be single, there is nothing in the world can change that, Not even God, why? because he gives you the desires of your heart. and My desire is to be single and alone. As the words of Mr Burns from Simpsons. " EXCELLENT "
S
Because some people can only find happiness in the things that they do if they do them with other people. Which, to me, is both preposterous and understandable. I enjoy making music alone as much as I enjoy it with others. I actually prefer to do my lifting alone, because working out with others feels distracted. On the OTHER hand, I enjoy cooking much more when I'm cooking for other people. I think it's just a matter of find things to do that you find satisfaction in, regardless of whether you have company or not. If you have NOTHING like that...then you need to find some hobbies that will do that. Being single is NOT a reason to be bored...it's just an excuse.
It can be as simple as curling up on your couch with a book and a cup of tea. For men (and some women), it's usually as simple as putting on a headset and picking up a controller.
Oh, that's ludicrously simple! Stop centering your identity around being single. You know who I'm talking about, we've all had those friends.
"Hey, Molly. How's it hanging?"
"Ugh. Terrible. Still single."
"..."
"How are things going over in the math department, Molly?"
"Still no men interested in me, so, bad."
"..."
"Morning, Molly! How was your weekend?"
"Ugh, the worst. No one on OKCupid messaged me, so I sat at home and ate a gallon of ice cream."
The only thing this person is focused on is their singleness. For single Christians, there are SO MANY OTHER THINGS we should be focused on. You focus on your relationship with Christ. You can focus on the relationships with fellow brothers and sisters in church. You can focus on the things you are doing to spread His word. You can just be flippin' thankful that He loved you enough to die for you.
"Hey, Molly. How was your weekend?"
"It was amazing! I got together with some people from my church, and we made what must have been a hojillion peanut butter and honey sandwiches, and we spent the afternoon giving them to the homeless. Man, we are SO blessed."
"How you doing there, Moll?"
"I am FIRED UP. I got to Psalm 18 in my reading this morning, and I know I've got The Big Guy on my side!"
"What's going on, Molly?"
"Hey - can't talk, I'm meeting some friends for dinner, and we're going to have a jam session afterwards."
Being single is only ONE of many facets of who you are. Here are a few of mine:
Christian
Son/Brother/Uncle/Grandson/Newphew
Musician
Driving enthusiast
Fitness enthusiast
Carnivore
Single and available
There SO many other aspects of my personality - why should I focus on the one where I am dissatisfied? I find joy and satisfaction in all of the other aspects of who I am, the first three especially. Happiness isn't found in companionship, it's found in Christ. He is our peace, He is our joy, He is our comfort. Everything else is just a pleasant surprise.
It can be as simple as curling up on your couch with a book and a cup of tea. For men (and some women), it's usually as simple as putting on a headset and picking up a controller.
Oh, that's ludicrously simple! Stop centering your identity around being single. You know who I'm talking about, we've all had those friends.
"Hey, Molly. How's it hanging?"
"Ugh. Terrible. Still single."
"..."
"How are things going over in the math department, Molly?"
"Still no men interested in me, so, bad."
"..."
"Morning, Molly! How was your weekend?"
"Ugh, the worst. No one on OKCupid messaged me, so I sat at home and ate a gallon of ice cream."
The only thing this person is focused on is their singleness. For single Christians, there are SO MANY OTHER THINGS we should be focused on. You focus on your relationship with Christ. You can focus on the relationships with fellow brothers and sisters in church. You can focus on the things you are doing to spread His word. You can just be flippin' thankful that He loved you enough to die for you.
"Hey, Molly. How was your weekend?"
"It was amazing! I got together with some people from my church, and we made what must have been a hojillion peanut butter and honey sandwiches, and we spent the afternoon giving them to the homeless. Man, we are SO blessed."
"How you doing there, Moll?"
"I am FIRED UP. I got to Psalm 18 in my reading this morning, and I know I've got The Big Guy on my side!"
"What's going on, Molly?"
"Hey - can't talk, I'm meeting some friends for dinner, and we're going to have a jam session afterwards."
Being single is only ONE of many facets of who you are. Here are a few of mine:
Christian
Son/Brother/Uncle/Grandson/Newphew
Musician
Driving enthusiast
Fitness enthusiast
Carnivore
Single and available
There SO many other aspects of my personality - why should I focus on the one where I am dissatisfied? I find joy and satisfaction in all of the other aspects of who I am, the first three especially. Happiness isn't found in companionship, it's found in Christ. He is our peace, He is our joy, He is our comfort. Everything else is just a pleasant surprise.
Job 5:17 Behold, happy [is] the man whom God correcteth: therefore despise not thou the chastening of the Almighty:
Ps 128:1-2 Blessed [is] every one that feareth the LORD; that walketh in his ways. For thou shalt eat the labour of thine hands: happy [shalt] thou [be], and [it shall be] well with thee.
Prov 16:20 He that handleth a matter wisely shall find good: and whoso trusteth in the LORD, happy [is] he.
1 Peter 4:14 If ye be reproached for the name of Christ, happy [are ye]; for the spirit of glory and of God resteth upon you: on their part he is evil spoken of, but on your part he is glorified.
Ps 128:1-2 Blessed [is] every one that feareth the LORD; that walketh in his ways. For thou shalt eat the labour of thine hands: happy [shalt] thou [be], and [it shall be] well with thee.
Prov 16:20 He that handleth a matter wisely shall find good: and whoso trusteth in the LORD, happy [is] he.
1 Peter 4:14 If ye be reproached for the name of Christ, happy [are ye]; for the spirit of glory and of God resteth upon you: on their part he is evil spoken of, but on your part he is glorified.
C
I think our society somewhat influences this view on singleness. I can't even think of a show that expresses th beauty of th single life.
I'm single and happy! I think I'm this way because with th help of God, I chose to b. I chose to c th benefit and excitement of th single life. I can do whatever I want, everything I own is mine alone, don't hav to wrry abot relationship mattrs, hav more money, can volunteer more, explore more, just be me! It takes a strong person to b content single and it's not for everyone, but if u can u hav way more of a spiritual relationship and closeness to th Lord than othrs. U get lonely, but everyone does once in a while, even my friends in relationships do... Yet unlike them I can just go out and do something exciting, meanwhile there crying and trying to figure out how to fix their relationship problems
I'm single and happy! I think I'm this way because with th help of God, I chose to b. I chose to c th benefit and excitement of th single life. I can do whatever I want, everything I own is mine alone, don't hav to wrry abot relationship mattrs, hav more money, can volunteer more, explore more, just be me! It takes a strong person to b content single and it's not for everyone, but if u can u hav way more of a spiritual relationship and closeness to th Lord than othrs. U get lonely, but everyone does once in a while, even my friends in relationships do... Yet unlike them I can just go out and do something exciting, meanwhile there crying and trying to figure out how to fix their relationship problems
S
Well, perhaps when you reply to a person, you might want to add specifiers, like "FOR ME" or "IN MY CASE." Because when you word things like this:
...You are basically telling a person, "Hey, this is how it is for EVERYONE who is unmarried but wants to be." We all KNOW you're unhappy about your situation, man. But that doesn't mean you get to say EVERYONE in your situation is unhappy. That's misleading.
...You are basically telling a person, "Hey, this is how it is for EVERYONE who is unmarried but wants to be." We all KNOW you're unhappy about your situation, man. But that doesn't mean you get to say EVERYONE in your situation is unhappy. That's misleading.
M
But you said that you don't like single life. Doesn't that mean that you are not truly happy? How can you be happy if there is an aspect of your life that you don't like
I don't see how single life can be happy for people who want marriage. Brb everything sexual is a sin, denying your sex drive, loneliness, living like a monk.
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This is actually a great question mykim. No one likes everything about their life. But happiness is still within reach for all of us. Happiness isn't about life circumstances. It's about who YOU ARE as a person. If you are unhappy, don't look outward to fix the problem... look inward.
Happiness comes from thankfulness. If you are truly grateful for what you have, how can you be unhappy? The more grateful you are, the more happy you will be. I know it isn't as easy as that, but the concept is true, and with practice and discipline you can train yourself to think this way. Concentrate on what you DO like about your life, on what your blessings are, and the troubles of your life will start to fade away.
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.
Happiness comes from thankfulness. If you are truly grateful for what you have, how can you be unhappy? The more grateful you are, the more happy you will be. I know it isn't as easy as that, but the concept is true, and with practice and discipline you can train yourself to think this way. Concentrate on what you DO like about your life, on what your blessings are, and the troubles of your life will start to fade away.
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.
S
Did...you...even read my first response to the OP? No, of course you didn't, you probably saw that I was going to be positive and uplifting, and you never want anything to do with that. But let's give it a shot. (I'm not going to cut and paste it here because I am on my phone. You scroll up and read post #6.)
To stress: singleness is but ONE of many facets of my identity. Go and read my list...that's in order of priority.
Let's be metaphorical in our two different approaches. You and I sit down for a Thanksgiving dinner. One rule: you must eat everything on your plate. The turkey is delectable, the stuffing is divine, the rolls are perfect, even the pie is indescribably good. But the green bean casserole is terrible.
Me: "That was a pretty awesome meal, really. Granted, the casserole was pretty lousy...tough to get down, but man, everything else was fantastic."
You: "This is the absolute worst experience of my life. I would have rather starved to death."
Which one of us sounds unreasonable?
Everyone has a choice in how they see the things in their life. You may not be able to control what HAPPENS to you, but you sure as heck can choose how to respond. And instead of focusing on the many blessings you have been given (do you live in a cardboard box on the street? have you not eaten in 3 days? do you have a terminal illness? has every family member or friend you've ever had shunned you or died? NO? THEN YOU ARE BLESSED.) you have instead chosen to focus your entire perspective on your singleness.
(Or at least whenever you visit CC, that's the whole of your perspective, because that is literally the only thing you EVER have to say. "I'm single, it's the worst, I'm the worst, I am going to die a virgin." Maybe in other places, you say other things. You know, normal conversation? "Man, I had a breakfast burrito this morning that was off the HOOK. Did you watch How I Met Your Mother last night? Oh, you were playing Call of Duty. I'll play with you guys next time." Do you talk about other things with other people? Just...put your focus ELSEWHERE, for like sixty seconds, man.)
There are a lot of things that make you into YOU. And where ever you CHOOSE to place the most focus is where you're going to build your identity. Are you a son or a brother? Then make THAT the focus of your identity, being the best, most loving, most Christ-like son/brother/uncle you can be. Like my man William says, 'Whatever you embrace, you become.' Let go of what you've focused on, and focus on who Christ sees you as.
Man, I have GOT to get that router fixed. Ugh.
To stress: singleness is but ONE of many facets of my identity. Go and read my list...that's in order of priority.
Let's be metaphorical in our two different approaches. You and I sit down for a Thanksgiving dinner. One rule: you must eat everything on your plate. The turkey is delectable, the stuffing is divine, the rolls are perfect, even the pie is indescribably good. But the green bean casserole is terrible.
Me: "That was a pretty awesome meal, really. Granted, the casserole was pretty lousy...tough to get down, but man, everything else was fantastic."
You: "This is the absolute worst experience of my life. I would have rather starved to death."
Which one of us sounds unreasonable?
Everyone has a choice in how they see the things in their life. You may not be able to control what HAPPENS to you, but you sure as heck can choose how to respond. And instead of focusing on the many blessings you have been given (do you live in a cardboard box on the street? have you not eaten in 3 days? do you have a terminal illness? has every family member or friend you've ever had shunned you or died? NO? THEN YOU ARE BLESSED.) you have instead chosen to focus your entire perspective on your singleness.
(Or at least whenever you visit CC, that's the whole of your perspective, because that is literally the only thing you EVER have to say. "I'm single, it's the worst, I'm the worst, I am going to die a virgin." Maybe in other places, you say other things. You know, normal conversation? "Man, I had a breakfast burrito this morning that was off the HOOK. Did you watch How I Met Your Mother last night? Oh, you were playing Call of Duty. I'll play with you guys next time." Do you talk about other things with other people? Just...put your focus ELSEWHERE, for like sixty seconds, man.)
There are a lot of things that make you into YOU. And where ever you CHOOSE to place the most focus is where you're going to build your identity. Are you a son or a brother? Then make THAT the focus of your identity, being the best, most loving, most Christ-like son/brother/uncle you can be. Like my man William says, 'Whatever you embrace, you become.' Let go of what you've focused on, and focus on who Christ sees you as.
Man, I have GOT to get that router fixed. Ugh.