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J
THE QUESTIONS OF THIS THREAD ARE:
1. If people think that courting/dating is evil, how do they propose to meet/obtain a spouse?
2. How does a man cherish a woman he does not love (i.e. - a stranger)(Ephesians 5)?
3. How does a woman respect a man she does not know (i.e. - a stranger)(see Ephesians 5)?
1. If people think that courting/dating is evil, how do they propose to meet/obtain a spouse?
2. How does a man cherish a woman he does not love (i.e. - a stranger)(Ephesians 5)?
3. How does a woman respect a man she does not know (i.e. - a stranger)(see Ephesians 5)?
1. Not evil. I'm assuming they are planning to take monastic vows of chastity. Or hope some lonely soul wonders onto their front porch so they can claim that "God brought him/her to me."
2. He can't love someone he hasn't met—unless he's a time traveler. You could make a pretty existential argument, but I'm not sure it could really hold water.
3. She can't. Eph. 5:21 says for all believers to be in submission to all other believers, but women in general are not subservient to men in general. Once married, the two of them will discover what works for their marriage.
2. He can't love someone he hasn't met—unless he's a time traveler. You could make a pretty existential argument, but I'm not sure it could really hold water.
3. She can't. Eph. 5:21 says for all believers to be in submission to all other believers, but women in general are not subservient to men in general. Once married, the two of them will discover what works for their marriage.
I was so tempted to pick... ALL OF THEM just to keep that cat curious. But then with your follow up post discouraged me from such sillyness.
I have had thoughts on and off about dating and courting. I met a girl in my teens who was a very early adopter of the christian courting approach. Her relationship didn't turn out so well, but it left me with much to consider about this from an early age.
Truth is, 'dating' can(and does) mean so many different things to different people. My biggest dislike of dating is the expectations that accompany it for most people.
1) I don't especially plan to date, but don't hate it. Either way, I would not be opposed to an arranged marriage, especially if it was arranged by my parents.
2) Love is such a broad term.
I think "cherishing" is an act and like any other act, it can be done by choice. Making the choice gets easier with a deep love, but I think it's certainly possible to choose to cherish 99% of the time even without deep love. Then again, if there is no love then said person is probably not as close with God as they should be.
3) Respect can grow.
I may be reading into it too much, but 2 and 3 seem to be pointing towards "its not possible(??) to love someone you haven't dated/courted". If this is where you were going with that, I would have to disagree. The idea of all of them is to get to know the person. In the case of dating it is with little commitment, in the case of courting it is with a moderate amount of commitment and with an arranged marriage it is with a lot of commitment.
If I felt led by God to marry a girl I had never met and she reciprocated, I would be completely willing to commit to loving her forever and never leaving her. I mean what are the chances of that right? Only one way something like that could happen, and that's if it's God. And what God has brought together...
EDIT: Wow lots of rambling... Also, one last thought: I think it may be different for a woman. When I know that I am strong enough to stay close to God, not relying on her to lead.... it makes it easier to commit to the unknown I think.
I have had thoughts on and off about dating and courting. I met a girl in my teens who was a very early adopter of the christian courting approach. Her relationship didn't turn out so well, but it left me with much to consider about this from an early age.
Truth is, 'dating' can(and does) mean so many different things to different people. My biggest dislike of dating is the expectations that accompany it for most people.
1) I don't especially plan to date, but don't hate it. Either way, I would not be opposed to an arranged marriage, especially if it was arranged by my parents.
2) Love is such a broad term.
I think "cherishing" is an act and like any other act, it can be done by choice. Making the choice gets easier with a deep love, but I think it's certainly possible to choose to cherish 99% of the time even without deep love. Then again, if there is no love then said person is probably not as close with God as they should be.3) Respect can grow.
I may be reading into it too much, but 2 and 3 seem to be pointing towards "its not possible(??) to love someone you haven't dated/courted". If this is where you were going with that, I would have to disagree. The idea of all of them is to get to know the person. In the case of dating it is with little commitment, in the case of courting it is with a moderate amount of commitment and with an arranged marriage it is with a lot of commitment.
If I felt led by God to marry a girl I had never met and she reciprocated, I would be completely willing to commit to loving her forever and never leaving her. I mean what are the chances of that right? Only one way something like that could happen, and that's if it's God. And what God has brought together...
EDIT: Wow lots of rambling... Also, one last thought: I think it may be different for a woman. When I know that I am strong enough to stay close to God, not relying on her to lead.... it makes it easier to commit to the unknown I think.
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S
DUH! Just like they did in the Old Testament, of course!
--Go over to an uncle you've never met, and marry a cousin. NATURALLY!
--Work for a dude for seven years, and he'll give you a daughter. TA DAAA!
--If you like the other daughter better, double down for seven more, and barely pay attention to the first! PERFECT!!!
--Find some pretty girl gleaning in your field, and tell your servants to let her stick around. NO-FAIL SOLUTION.
--Dad died? Take up with his concubine. Totally biblical. WHERE IS MY DAD'S CONCUBINE?
--Kill a bunch of Philistines. King gives you a daughter. WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THIS SOONER?
--Hide from the king on a stranger's land. When God kills the stranger, take his widow. TOTALLY ON A ROLL HERE.
--Sleep with your soldier's wife. Then send him to the front lines to get killed. BIBLICAL WAYS TO MEET WOMEN HERE, PEOPLE.
Those are the examples the Bible gives, right? So that's how we roll.
--Go over to an uncle you've never met, and marry a cousin. NATURALLY!
--Work for a dude for seven years, and he'll give you a daughter. TA DAAA!
--If you like the other daughter better, double down for seven more, and barely pay attention to the first! PERFECT!!!
--Find some pretty girl gleaning in your field, and tell your servants to let her stick around. NO-FAIL SOLUTION.
--Dad died? Take up with his concubine. Totally biblical. WHERE IS MY DAD'S CONCUBINE?
--Kill a bunch of Philistines. King gives you a daughter. WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THIS SOONER?
--Hide from the king on a stranger's land. When God kills the stranger, take his widow. TOTALLY ON A ROLL HERE.
--Sleep with your soldier's wife. Then send him to the front lines to get killed. BIBLICAL WAYS TO MEET WOMEN HERE, PEOPLE.
Those are the examples the Bible gives, right? So that's how we roll.
I
Dude...I have been on zero dates since my divorce,and zero fornication...so I'm really really really doing it wrong I apparently. Maybe it's the women I am interested in like pizza more than,I dunno...a goodnight kiss? Maybe I need to somehow combine romance & pizza with a Godly spin. it is 2014 after all & times have changed.
