Hi,
I have recently decided to accept jesus into my life, but I still have a lot of issues. Currently, I cannot find employment or make a living and also still single.
I am a 28 year old virgin and have never ever had a relationship or a woman in my life. This has caused me to become heavily addicted to pornography over the years. I also know that I am ugly and disgusting and will never be able to get married. I say that i am disgusting because my hands are always cold and sweaty and i have an ugly face. Also, women are just not interested in me.
What am I to do about this? I don't want to displease god but i cannot deal with being alone and dieing a kissless virgin. I need my pornography to ease the pain. I tried praying to god to help me resist, but I just can't. Is there any hope for me? I feel so miserable when I see happy christian couples. I know that i will never find love and marry.
Do not listen to people who make you see the butcher's knife..
Jesus does see your pain..
you have to sometime Realize that Jesus is Alive,He is the Living God not some idol with no life.
For that i Pray(will be Praying) and wish that God leads you to a divine encounter so that you Start Trusting Him.
Whatever the addiction(no matter what) for God its a sin,...its all sins,..nothing greater or less.
you have to understand that various lusts including lust of flesh which includes sexual lust(where porn also comes in) are stimulated by evil spirits.
Reality:- Most people will give so many big advises(which makes you feel like they are gods) where only few might talk from experience.Getting out from any addiction is possible In Jesus's Name...but may not be easy and sudden..
Don't give up,its your loneliness that makes you do such things.Start Praying with a Sincere request to God that 'its not within you to deal with this weakness'..Fast and Pray...if you can,don't think about perfectness in that.Even if you fail,when you feel broken Cry out to God.Jesus will HEAL you.
He is not a condemning God.He is Love.He will Heal and Fix you where you cannot.
He will Guide you to all Truth and give you rest.Just don't give up..
God sees your broken Heart and you have Repentance.Sometimes it makes me feel that its for talking to brothers and sisters like you that God brought me to CC.
If you attend a Church,be a part of it.There is 99% chance that elders may not help you there.Nor will many others.Do you know why?Because they might be weaker than you ...compared to the time when you have become a Victorious man in Jesus they will still be vulnerable and don't show it.i think you get the point
But the reason why you must attend a Fellowship is that Spiritual warfare is many times stronger when you worship in a Christian Gathering.It doesnt matter in Worship who is weak or Strong because Holy Spirit will be there in the midst...That's the advantage,satan cannot play games with Holy Spirit.Always remember that...and that's the beginning step to Victory
Continue Fellowship and God will make you an Overcomer from all filth and you will be guiding others to Jesus in the long run.
if you don't have a Church Fellowship,Please take the hardship to find one(where Jesus is only worshiped,no saint mary or any other saints including infant jesus..).The hardship will be only there in the beginning,in the long run God will make your Life sweet and will get you a Life partner too
Trust in God.He is not man to change words,His Words do not change..
(if you have doubts please ask,usually people don't ask....still telling this if you need clarification)
So Pray to God that He Leads you to Compassionate people who can mold you to be a Faith & Prayer Warrior.With God All Things Are Possible
Read Galatians 6 KJV,that's how real Christians look and behave.Discern with that, each and every comment and the people you speak to.Also Trust in God.He will Lead you to Rest where you haven't got any rest till now.
Sincerity matters before God, then only God can help us and Give us the Grace to Obey Him.That is His part.Be Sincere before God first,..He will Help you because He died for losers like me and you...That's what Christianity is all about.
you will see God removing all the chains of bondage one by one by the Power of God.
God bless
Shame on condemnation preachers...don't pay heed to such.