What Does A Father Do ?

[J-Kay-2]

What does a Father do when he is raising his children
and one or more is a daughter?

I was in a restaurant this week and saw a man take a
little girl about 4 or 5 yrs old in the Mens restroom.
I think what troubled me so much was I saw men coming
and going in and out there, because I was facing the
opening and knew when the men went in and came out.

I pondered that question after I came home, and obviously,
still ponder it. What does a Father do ? I would not want
my child seeing men at a urinal.

Actually she was large enough she could have gone in the
ladies and he could have waited outside the door for her.

Okay, so the more I thought about it a day or so later, I
thought if I were to see that happen again, would it be
wrong of me to offer to take the little girl in to the restroom
myself ? I know we are taking a big chance and could be
misunderstood.

I remember when my grandson was grade school age and
his father took him them away for Christmas or on vacation,
he would let him go into a Rest area by himself. I was like
dumb founded that a father would let a little boy go into a
rest room in a rest area.

Now I see the little girl going into a restroom, it makes me
ill.

Any thoughts ? Dad, ladies ? What would you do ?

 

[SabbieWabbie]

I don't think it's so bad that he took her to the restroom with him, she's five, she shouldn't really be thinking much in the way of men and their private parts, but I am sure at that inquisitive age she would ask questions though. I hope he covered her eyes and took her into a private stall then, if that eases your mind a little.

 

[J-Kay-2]

I don't think it's so bad that he took her to the restroom with him, she's five, she shouldn't really be thinking much in the way of men and their private parts, but I am sure at that inquisitive age she would ask questions though. I hope he covered her eyes and took her into a private stall then, if that eases your mind a little.

I have not been in that restroom so I don't know how it is set up.
Most I have accidently walked into, (yes, I have a time or two) LOL
the urinal is visible within site as the door is opened. I realize not
all are set up the same. My husband felt it was not a good idea.
So, would I be asking for trouble by asking a father if he would want
me to take his little girl in ? I am silver haired, I would hope he could
see I am harmless grandmother. Thanks for your thoughts. J~K~2

 

[SabbieWabbie]

I have not been in that restroom so I don't know how it is set up.
Most I have accidently walked into, (yes, I have a time or two) LOL
the urinal is visible within site as the door is opened. I realize not
all are set up the same. My husband felt it was not a good idea.
So, would I be asking for trouble by asking a father if he would want
me to take his little girl in ? I am silver haired, I would hope he could
see I am harmless grandmother. Thanks for your thoughts. J~K~2

No harm in asking, the sentiment is lovely and thoughtful, in today's day and age though I personally would be scared and very hesitant to have a stranger take my child out of eyes sight. (Or maybe this is just because I am from South Africa- aka rape and aids capital of the world, and with the silly belief that sexual relations with a young child will cure aids, so this happens A LOT). Silver haired or not-anything can happen. I would hope someone wouldn't be offended if they asked me and I said no.

 

[J-Kay-2]

No harm in asking, the sentiment is lovely and thoughtful, in today's day and age though I personally would be scared and very hesitant to have a stranger take my child out of eyes sight. (Or maybe this is just because I am from South Africa- aka rape and aids capital of the world, and with the silly belief that sexual relations with a young child will cure aids, so this happens A LOT). Silver haired or not-anything can happen. I would hope someone wouldn't be offended if they asked me and I said no.

I know what you mean. I thought the same thing as you. I put myself in
that mans place and would I want a woman take my child into the restroom.
Actually where I was the tables were like right at the opening of a little
foyer and right in the door one walks to go in. Now if it were in a large
place and the child had to be taken out of sight of people, that really would
be a different story.

I still have issues of a little girl seeing men using a bathroom. I am sorry,
but I can't stand that image. I have reasons though, so I suppose that was
why it troubled me. Thank you for giving your opinion. Bless you ~

 

[Toska]

I see nothing wrong with you offering to take a little girl into the women's restroom for her father. I think you offering to do that would be very gracious. If the father had any concerns, he could wait outside the door for his daughter to finish. It never hurts to ask and the worst that would happen is the father telling you no.

Once when I was a child and my father had to take me to the restroom, he had me look inside the women's restroom and see if there were women inside. Once all of the women were out of the restroom, he took me into the ladies room. As women came in, he asked for their pardon and told them that he would only be a minute because he was waiting for his daughter. I can still remember this because I thought my dad was so awesome to do that for me. I also remember the women being impressed at his willingness to do what it took to make me feel comfortable.

 

[CatHerder]

When my kids were small, we were just beginning to get more of those unisex "family" restrooms in malls and such.

When those were not available, I would carry my toddler child (all three of my kids are girls) into the men's room in so that she is facing the wall, and wait for her outside the stall. I didn't make a big deal of it, but just talked to her so she was focused on me and not her surroundings.

When old enough to go to the ladies room unattended, I would wait outside. If there was a long wait, I always appreciated it if a woman came out asking "Is the little red haired one yours? There was a long line in there, but she's washing her hands now" or something along those lines so I woudn't worry.

 

[J-Kay-2]

Thanks for the replies. I know there is no pat answer to my question
because every situation is different. I feel compassion for a father who
has to raise daughters and face all the different phases of a young girls life.

It is good to know we are aware today there are some really nasty people
out there. I think we each have heard horrible stories, and that makes us
more aware of every little detail. Thank you all and God Bless ~ J~K~2