family troubles

SarahMoore · May 13, 2014

Okay so I am not sure how to write this. But I will try my best. I dont come from a very happy family. Some would say it is broken. How do I put this. I am afraid a big part of me hates my family. I am 25 but when I was about 12-13 my brothers and I were taken away by the state. Ultimately I am grateful for it. I wouldn't be the woman I am today if this hadn't he happened. Though where my mother is concerned I am still harboring a lot of resentment. She has always in my eyes favored my brothers. I feel I always get the short end of the stick. It's difficult to even be civil with her. I am having a very hard time describing this. I just dont know how to put it into words. This whole "family" situation has me so down sometimes I contemplate more permanent ways out. I always feel ashamed for even thinking this way. I will be moving soon for school and for some reason in am scared to leave this place because its a comfort zone. Albeit not a healthy one. I want to leave but I have no confidence in myself. I am even seriously considering leaving and just cutting them out of my life completely. Am I just running away from my problems? Or am I allowing myself the time and space I need to take care of myself and really gain that healthy loving wonderful relationship with God that I want so badly. I want to be the best that I can be and I know that someday i will have to forgive my family but at this point it just seems impossible to me. Im not sure if im a good enough person to do it. I dont know if I know how to do it. I know im not telling this like I would like to but for some reason I just cant find a way to describe this overwhelming sadness and loneliness that I am feeling. I know that God is always therethere and maybe that is why I have been watching the Passion so much. Its just nice to be reminded that even though I dont feel any love from the people who should love me that Jesus loves me enough to die for me and everyone else just so we can have a chance to be happy.

Any advice here would be wonderful

faroukfarouk · May 13, 2014

SarahMoore said:

Okay so I am not sure how to write this. But I will try my best. I dont come from a very happy family. Some would say it is broken. How do I put this. I am afraid a big part of me hates my family. I am 25 but when I was about 12-13 my brothers and I were taken away by the state. Ultimately I am grateful for it. I wouldn't be the woman I am today if this hadn't he happened. Though where my mother is concerned I am still harboring a lot of resentment. She has always in my eyes favored my brothers. I feel I always get the short end of the stick. It's difficult to even be civil with her. I am having a very hard time describing this. I just dont know how to put it into words. This whole "family" situation has me so down sometimes I contemplate more permanent ways out. I always feel ashamed for even thinking this way. I will be moving soon for school and for some reason in am scared to leave this place because its a comfort zone. Albeit not a healthy one. I want to leave but I have no confidence in myself. I am even seriously considering leaving and just cutting them out of my life completely. Am I just running away from my problems? Or am I allowing myself the time and space I need to take care of myself and really gain that healthy loving wonderful relationship with God that I want so badly. I want to be the best that I can be and I know that someday i will have to forgive my family but at this point it just seems impossible to me. Im not sure if im a good enough person to do it. I dont know if I know how to do it. I know im not telling this like I would like to but for some reason I just cant find a way to describe this overwhelming sadness and loneliness that I am feeling. I know that God is always therethere and maybe that is why I have been watching the Passion so much. Its just nice to be reminded that even though I dont feel any love from the people who should love me that Jesus loves me enough to die for me and everyone else just so we can have a chance to be happy.

Any advice here would be wonderful

The fellowship of a Bible believing local church with warm relationships with pastors'/elders' wives, would be a help, I think.

SarahMoore · May 13, 2014

I will definitely be looking into one. I really would like some help I cant take the negative attention and put downs anymore. I feel like their toxic ways are turning me into a bitter hateful person and that's not who I am nor who i want to be.

faroukfarouk · May 13, 2014

SarahMoore said:

While you look for a Bible based local church, John chapter 14 and Psalm 46 might help you to be going on with.

Blessings.

brokenclay · May 13, 2014

Dear sister; do you have faithful Christian friends? Even one that is stable in their walk with Christ?
It is not easy for single men or woman in this world. I felt like you at one time and really had to push
myself to move forward. I had no building blocks to give me self-confidents. However; since you
can see that your Saviour Jesus Christ chose to suffer and die for you; and then come right back
into your life 2000 years later by the power of the Holy Spirit; then this same Spirit you asked to
save you will also enable you to do your master's good and perfect will. God chooses the weak things
over the strong and he makes wise the simple. Ask your heavenly father to lift the fear off of you and
direct your thoughts and make a way for your to go where he wants you. Stay close to your bible and
thank and praise God. Then open your bible and he will speak to you. God may lay things on your
heart to pray about. If you re read your own story on here you will see some things that need to be
brought to God's attention. Don't look for favours from your family; look for favour from God.
ok. now I would like to pray for you. Lord! Thank you for your mercy and grace towards us. Thank you for
your plans to prosper us and not to harm us. As you can see and hear your daughter in Christ; Sarah Moore;
she is looking for strength and confidence and as well understanding as to what to do with her life. Father; I pray
that Sarah will find favour in your sight and that you will fill her with your Spirit and give her your peace and the
joy of your Salvation. Guide her mind and heart. Keep her in your Word; thy Word is Truth. Keep her from the evil one.
Give her understanding of your word and give her clarity for what you want her to do. Show her what you see and reveal
your heart's desire. Bless her mind, body and soul and the path she will take. In Christ; Amen! Cheers

cinder · May 13, 2014

SarahMoore said:

The tone of this post is that of someone who has little confidence in her ability to make her own decisions or do anything right. Mix that with what you said about your toxic family and all the put downs and I can only conclude that this is due to your family situation. I think the best thing for you will be to take the really scary leap of faith and strike out "on your own". You can do it, especially with the help of the Lord and a body of believers that he will provide. Realize that this is something you will have to do sooner or later if you are ever to escape the destructive patterns of your family. It isn't running away from your problems; it is giving yourself the freedom to heal and be restored so that some day you can bring that same gift to your family. But you will have to heal first. God loves you, we love you and you're going to be alright. They say there are 365 "Fear not"'s in the Bible; one for every day of the year. So fear not, God goes with you (Joshua 1:9)

pastac · May 13, 2014

You will manage just fine Jesus/God will be near always as in the Holy Spirit all you need do is stay focused. Be cautious about what you read and what enters your hungry spirit.
I was told by a great teacher a hungry man walking in the desert will eat anything! Be careful not to take everything into your spirit.

Learn how to pray during this time of transition. This will give you peace knowing God hears your prayers. You are beautifully and wonderfully made and your soul knows that right well. A
s for your mother you will have to honor her just like scripture says. But that can be done from a distance until God completes his work in that area for you.

Love her respect her pray for her from a distance until God opens that door for you to have the conversation that will come. Grow into the woman God wants you to be, learn how to see in the spirit as you walk in the spirit.
Read your bible ask questions and by all means get rest for your body and mind. I'll pray for you and you can pm anytime.

jogoldie · May 13, 2014

Let me get this straight...you grow up in a broken home....get taken away ....gets no encouragement.....but you still
found it possible to get into college....do you understand what kind of strength you possess....what amazing ability
you have....its hard enough in a good home to focus on school....we cant make people treat us the way they should...
I would be proud to call you my daughter....go to school ....see this through....it will give you a safe place to see if you like
being on your own....use this time to spend with God...He says He will provide....and I can tell you He always has for me.....
I've been I n desperate times and He always made sure I was provided for.....use this experience to help other young woman
who find themselves in your position....God is faithful...You are a remarkable woman to be able to survive this beginning...
Dont stop now...if you can just help one girl...you would be successful..and what youve experianced will have worth...
Hold your head high my sister you have come through the fire and now you have the opportunity to fly......
Im praying for you... may you feel all Gods love for you ....

SarahMoore · May 13, 2014

brokenclay said:

Dear sister; do you have faithful Christian friends? Even one that is stable in their walk with Christ?
It is not easy for single men or woman in this world. I felt like you at one time and really had to push
myself to move forward. I had no building blocks to give me self-confidents. However; since you
can see that your Saviour Jesus Christ chose to suffer and die for you; and then come right back
into your life 2000 years later by the power of the Holy Spirit; then this same Spirit you asked to
save you will also enable you to do your master's good and perfect will. God chooses the weak things
over the strong and he makes wise the simple. Ask your heavenly father to lift the fear off of you and
direct your thoughts and make a way for your to go where he wants you. Stay close to your bible and
thank and praise God. Then open your bible and he will speak to you. God may lay things on your
heart to pray about. If you re read your own story on here you will see some things that need to be
brought to God's attention. Don't look for favours from your family; look for favour from God.
ok. now I would like to pray for you. Lord! Thank you for your mercy and grace towards us. Thank you for
your plans to prosper us and not to harm us. As you can see and hear your daughter in Christ; Sarah Moore;
she is looking for strength and confidence and as well understanding as to what to do with her life. Father; I pray
that Sarah will find favour in your sight and that you will fill her with your Spirit and give her your peace and the
joy of your Salvation. Guide her mind and heart. Keep her in your Word; thy Word is Truth. Keep her from the evil one.
Give her understanding of your word and give her clarity for what you want her to do. Show her what you see and reveal
your heart's desire. Bless her mind, body and soul and the path she will take. In Christ; Amen! Cheers

Thank you for your prayers! As for Christian friends I dont have as many as I would like. Another reason I am here.

SarahMoore · May 13, 2014

cinder said:

The tone of this post is that of someone who has little confidence in her ability to make her own decisions or do anything right. Mix that with what you said about your toxic family and all the put downs and I can only conclude that this is due to your family situation. I think the best thing for you will be to take the really scary leap of faith and strike out "on your own". You can do it, especially with the help of the Lord and a body of believers that he will provide. Realize that this is something you will have to do sooner or later if you are ever to escape the destructive patterns of your family. It isn't running away from your problems; it is giving yourself the freedom to heal and be restored so that some day you can bring that same gift to your family. But you will have to heal first. God loves you, we love you and you're going to be alright. They say there are 365 "Fear not"'s in the Bible; one for every day of the year. So fear not, God goes with you (Joshua 1:9)

Thank you for your opinion. A lot of it mirrors what i have been thinking. Like I said in move this summer for school and it is scary but I need to do it for me. Thank you for the quote.

Eva1218 · May 13, 2014

Hey Sarah,
so glad your seeking Godly advice for your situation. First I would like to say that when one is faced with a challenging childhood it is best as an adult to deal with the feeling, hurts and let downs. By doing this one must pray and ask GOD to clean their heart and mind from all the thoughts that seem to take control. Seems this has given you a since of low self esteem and doubt. Know GOD is always there for you even it the worst of situations. Find a way to forgive no matter what. Forgiveness is needed for your healing. Know that forgiveness is not saying it was or is okay for what their actions have made you feel, forgiveness is needed to help you move forward. It stating that what has happened will no longer affect your future. Pray and ask GOD regarding your future plans and while your working on forgiveness learn to love GOD first, you second family third and others. Once you have a handle on this you will be able to help others who have similar situations and you will be able to use your circumstance to help others and you won't feel so alone or helpless. It will empower you and give you your purpose.

My Prayer for you.
Heavenly FATHER I come to YOU in behalf of YOUR daughter Sarah. FATHER she needs YOU to show her how to move forward in her life. Help her to forgive and see the purpose YOU have for her and how YOU are able to turn her situation to where it helps others. Let her testimony help many others to get through hardships and let downs. Guide her footsteps in order for her to have a better future. Renew her heart and spirit, bring her to a Bible believing church where they teach the Truth and where she can grow and use her Gifts. FATHER work on her family help them to see the good in her and the hurt bring them together as only you can do. Send her Godly friends to help her on her journey. Give her a sense of Peace and Love. Cover her mind and empower her so that her low self esteem is courage. Bring Joy into her heart and spirit so that she may rejoice and give YOU Praise. FATHER YOU know her needs help her to live life as YOU see fit. We give YOU All the Glory and Honor and lift up The Name JESUS Thank YOU GOD for All that YOU do. Restore and make whole in JESUS NAME we Pray.
AMEN. :")

SarahMoore · May 14, 2014

Eva1218 said:

Hey Sarah,
so glad your seeking Godly advice for your situation. First I would like to say that when one is faced with a challenging childhood it is best as an adult to deal with the feeling, hurts and let downs. By doing this one must pray and ask GOD to clean their heart and mind from all the thoughts that seem to take control. Seems this has given you a since of low self esteem and doubt. Know GOD is always there for you even it the worst of situations. Find a way to forgive no matter what. Forgiveness is needed for your healing. Know that forgiveness is not saying it was or is okay for what their actions have made you feel, forgiveness is needed to help you move forward. It stating that what has happened will no longer affect your future. Pray and ask GOD regarding your future plans and while your working on forgiveness learn to love GOD first, you second family third and others. Once you have a handle on this you will be able to help others who have similar situations and you will be able to use your circumstance to help others and you won't feel so alone or helpless. It will empower you and give you your purpose.

My Prayer for you.
Heavenly FATHER I come to YOU in behalf of YOUR daughter Sarah. FATHER she needs YOU to show her how to move forward in her life. Help her to forgive and see the purpose YOU have for her and how YOU are able to turn her situation to where it helps others. Let her testimony help many others to get through hardships and let downs. Guide her footsteps in order for her to have a better future. Renew her heart and spirit, bring her to a Bible believing church where they teach the Truth and where she can grow and use her Gifts. FATHER work on her family help them to see the good in her and the hurt bring them together as only you can do. Send her Godly friends to help her on her journey. Give her a sense of Peace and Love. Cover her mind and empower her so that her low self esteem is courage. Bring Joy into her heart and spirit so that she may rejoice and give YOU Praise. FATHER YOU know her needs help her to live life as YOU see fit. We give YOU All the Glory and Honor and lift up The Name JESUS Thank YOU GOD for All that YOU do. Restore and make whole in JESUS NAME we Pray.
AMEN. :")

Thank you for your advice. It has put a lot into perspective. Definitely thank you for your prayers! I have been very excited with my decision to rebuild by relationship with God and all the help everyone's been giving me just makes me even more so. It also definitely cements my thoughts that this is where I need to be.

Nice_Lady · May 17, 2014

Who is my mother and who are my brothers? In Christ we are one family and all brothers. I think the parents and family is until you become adult or in my case until God adopted me. For a human a man leaves his parents (and glue to a wife). Get merried

MyPottersClay · May 17, 2014

Nice_lady is spot on. I to was taken from my mother at four, bounced around foster homes and finally adopted at 16. After high school I took the wrong path and it put distance between my family. we are on good terms but just don't talk. As for family I feel I am without. But God has given me two brothers in Christ. I cant hold resentment because never knew what caused people to make certain decision. Whats most important is finding Gods purpose and plan for your life. Wiki famous orphans and you will be inspired what God can do with His Life in you. This more than makes up for family or lack thereof.

Ariel82 · May 18, 2014

i don't think getting married right now is sound advice..

rather focus on building your relationship with God and completing college. too many young women end up pregnant and dropping out.

trying to go back to school while caring for a family is tough.

SarahMoore · May 18, 2014

jogoldie said:

Let me get this straight...you grow broken home....get taken away ....gets no encouragement.....but you still
found it possible to get into college....do you understand what kind of strength you possess....what amazing ability
you have....its hard enough in a good home to focus on school....we cant make people treat us the way they should...
I would be proud to call you my daughter....go to school ....see this through....it will give you a safe place to see if you like
being on your own....use this time to spend with God...He says He will provide....and I can tell you He always has for me.....
I've been I n desperate times and He always made sure I was provided for.....use this experience to help other young woman
who find themselves in your position....God is faithful...You are a remarkable woman to be able to survive this beginning...
Dont stop now...if you can just help one girl...you would be successful..and what youve experianced will have worth...
Hold your head high my sister you have come through the fire and now you have the opportunity to fly......
Im praying for you... may you feel all Gods love for you ....

This post made my day. Thank you for your encouragement and reassurance!

TrueDanish · May 26, 2014

SarahMoore said:

Okay so I am not sure how to write this. But I will try my best. I dont come from a very happy family. Some would say it is broken. How do I put this. I am afraid a big part of me hates my family. I am 25 but when I was about 12-13 my brothers and I were taken away by the state. Ultimately I am grateful for it. I wouldn't be the woman I am today if this hadn't he happened. Though where my mother is concerned I am still harboring a lot of resentment. She has always in my eyes favored my brothers. I feel I always get the short end of the stick. It's difficult to even be civil with her. I am having a very hard time describing this. I just dont know how to put it into words. This whole "family" situation has me so down sometimes I contemplate more permanent ways out. I always feel ashamed for even thinking this way. I will be moving soon for school and for some reason in am scared to leave this place because its a comfort zone. Albeit not a healthy one. I want to leave but I have no confidence in myself. I am even seriously considering leaving and just cutting them out of my life completely. Am I just running away from my problems? Or am I allowing myself the time and space I need to take care of myself and really gain that healthy loving wonderful relationship with God that I want so badly. I want to be the best that I can be and I know that someday i will have to forgive my family but at this point it just seems impossible to me. Im not sure if im a good enough person to do it. I dont know if I know how to do it. I know im not telling this like I would like to but for some reason I just cant find a way to describe this overwhelming sadness and loneliness that I am feeling. I know that God is always therethere and maybe that is why I have been watching the Passion so much. Its just nice to be reminded that even though I dont feel any love from the people who should love me that Jesus loves me enough to die for me and everyone else just so we can have a chance to be happy.

Any advice here would be wonderful

get married !!

Elin · May 26, 2014

TrueDanish said:

You are a troll.

Trolls are not welcome here.

SarahMoore · May 26, 2014

Elin said:

Yeah I saw his other thread on Paul vs Jesus and thought the same thing. Im assuming thats why he was banned.

wisebeardman · May 27, 2014

always a troll somewhere.

where is said school? what kind of school? sometimes you have to retreat (runaway) from battle if no chance at victory is present.

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