Again, you've misinterpreted what I was saying. I said I've been at "this" since I was 5... PRAYING. Not for my husband, just in general. I began my relationship with God when I was 5.
I have had an AMAZING relationship with God. He speaks to me regularly. Through signs, prophesy, prayer, and yes, even audibly. Would God speak audibly to a child who wasn't walking strong with Him? Have you heard the voice of God? I have. And when He spoke to me, He wasn't angry with me, He was encouraging me.
And again, I appreciate your "concern" but I am in no way idolizing my husband! I'm praying for him because I WAS CALLED TO. BY GOD.
God does know what each individual does and does not need, but does that mean we shouldn't talk to Him? Let him know how things are going? Pray for our friends and family? Pray for God's children whom He so adores? I think He likes when we talk about one another. We are His treasure, you know that right? He loves us more than anything! Which is saying a lot because he's God and He is EVERYTHING.
I wouldn't get along with you in person at all, FireWire, because I can tell from here that this is more about YOU than God.
I didn't verbalize praying the way YOU interpret praying so I must be in the wrong. I must be idolizing something (or someone). I spend HOURS a day in prayer. I am not exaggerating when I say God is my best friend. Even when I'm driving and I see something funny I'll laugh, and I know I'm laughing with God. I thank Him for that. I pray for the homeless guy on the street, that he may know the same kind of relationship I have with Jesus. I pray for my church leaders, that they may get an extra boost of support. I praise God for all He's done in my life--including the scary, frustrating, and sad--because I can see Him in it. I thank Him for where I'm at. I tell Him jokes sometimes. I pray that He can comfort me when I need it and that I'll find just the right verse in the bible to help me. I sing praises ALL the time. I love God more than ANYTHING this earth can provide. I am always in contact with Him. Always. Sometimes I don't hear back right away but that's never prevented me from talking to Him.
I'm a sinner. I am. I struggle. When I'm especially angry, I cuss like a sailor. I don't hold that back from God either. I cry out to Him and fall into Him. I let Him hold me and comfort me in the way only He can do. Then I ask to be forgiven for my behavior, because I know that's not what He wants from me. But he forgives me. And we're both happy again.
He's with me now, as I write this, because I not only want you to understand my heart, but His. His heart is for His children. Yes, He wants His will to be done, but His will is for us to see His heart. He wants what any father wants... For us to know the true love of their father and to cherish it.
I am doing His will by knowing that--by sharing that. God's light radiates through me. People ask me why I'm glowing and I can tell them, GOD! Many doors have been opened for me to share the gospel by just being me--by living for and loving God. That's amazing! That's not me doing it... It's all God... But I chose to let Him work through me because the relationship is a choice!
I love that God's heart is for me. I love that I'm adored and I love adoring and praising my true father! My husband is going to be the same, I'm just sending him a wee pick me up if he needs it.
Can't you feel it when people pray for you? Once my dear friend was on pain meds that made him suicidal. His now fiancé awoke abruptly in the night with it laid on her heart that she needed to pray for her future husband. (This was long before they had even begun dating, although they were acquainted.) It wasn't until recently that they came to realize the two instances coincided perfectly (by reviewing journals upon their engagement). HOW AMAZING IS THAT?! God knew! And just because He knows, doesn't mean he wants us to hang out and do nothing! No, He wants to hear from is always! In everything!
He knows my heart. He's very pleased with my praying. It's only been five days of concentrated praying (in addition to my other words), and I have been SO blessed in every area of my life! He is pleased with me. I love feeling my father's "hugs." Nothing beats His blessings.
God is good and he is holding my hand as I walk this journey. I can't say I'll be frequenting this forum anymore, mostly because I don't want to start any more arguments. I am the least confrontational person I know, haha! But this struck me to the core because this is my relationship under judgement.