There may be some truth to what your saying. I just found out that once again my wife has been comuncating with an old boy friend. This is one of three old lovers that she has been communicating with thoughtout our dating period and throughout our marriage. One of them she had sex with while we were dating. She told me she was done but every few months I would discover she was at it again. Sometime I would just ask her and she would admitt to it, thinking I may have discovered it on my own. She even confide with them about issues in our marriage. I've asked her to stop and it will just reservice again and again. One of the guys she cheeted with while we were dating, one of the other guys she admitted to having feeling of wanting to be with sexualy and the other one and most recent, my wife suggest they meet to just talk, from his response I can tell he wanted more. I could go on, but I will end with saying I believe she have met up with at least two of these guys.
If I were you, I'd confront her about this. I'd ask her why she thinks the lies she hears are from the Holy Spirit if she is living a life like this, flirting with sin and temptation. I'd also be asking for passwords and have it worked out where she knew I'd be checking her computer and phone. And I'd probably pay each of these men a visit to discuss staying away from her. You'd have to do with wisdom to avoid a physical confrontation. If they weren't cooperative, I might visit their wives, girlfriends, parents or pastors or even employers if they are using office equipment to contact your wife them know what's going on so they'd have someone else giving them good advice.
She recently told me that god has told her to forgive me and I'm thing, what have I done. I believe she maybe have second thought about the devoice. Unfortunately i'm having second thoughts too, I now want the devoice. She still don't trust me and at the same time she is still doing her mess.
I think I'd study the Bible with her and remind her that she's dead wrong (if she is), and warn her about blaspheming the Holy Spirit and the fact that falsely prophesying in the name of the Lord is such a serious sin that God had people put to death for it in the Old Testament. If what she said the Holy Spirit told her could relate to porn use, you need to consider that before you go this route. If you've been looking at porn and lusting after the women in the porn, and she got a word about some sexual immorality in your life, then you need to consider that could be something genuine. If she says you've had sex with women when you know you haven't, that's a different story. You could also point out that she may 'projecting' if she's guilty about her own thoughts.
She don't know I know about her recent conversations with her previous lover. My trust bucket for her is just about empty. My heart is at ease with this because even though I haven't caught her in the act, I have strong evidence she may have met up with them. I am 100% sure she been talking to one of them and asked him to come see her " to talk" as she say.
If she accuses you again, that may be a good time to bring it up, and forbid her from talking to the men, and let her know not to do it if she takes your marriage seriously.
From a Christian prospective is this divoive justified? Please I need some sound advice.
I wouldn't say so, but I do think your marriage is in a dangerous place. We human beings like to justify ourselves. She may be thinking she just wants to talk to these men as friends, maybe lying to herself. She may be more overt in her thoughts and think of lining up another man in case this thing doesn't work out, or there may be a whole lot more information she isn't talking about.
If you want to get some information about it, you could say, "I know about you and _____" the man she has been meeting.
I also think you should spend some time studying the Bible with her. Ephesians 5 talks about the husband loving his wife as Christ loved the church, and Christ washing the church with the water of the word. You could study the topic of marriage and divorce with her. Ephesians 5, Colossians 3, and I Peter 3 are passages that tell wives to submit to their husbands. That's relevant since you are telling her not to talk to old boyfriends. Her good sense and a desire to abstain from temptation should be enough, for her to know better but if you tell her not to, it's a submission issue as well. You can take her to Matthew 5, Matthew 19, other passages from the gospels, Romans 7 and I Corinthians 7 and show her that she is supposed to stay married to you for life. She could divorce you and marry anther, but that would be adultery. She needs to have that in mind. The possibilities for her are marriage, separating and celibacy (still disobedience), or variations on adultery (outright adultery acknowledge by society, or an adulterous remarriage.) If she wants to be right with GOd, that should be important to her.
To be fare, I haven't been perfect and need to disclose my junk. Earlie in our dating (3 Months) I had an encounter with an old girlfriend. My wife found out about this and was really hurt. She reacted and had an encounter with her ex. By the time she found out I was committed to her. I prayed about this, repented and asked for Gods forgiveness and grace. I shared this with my wife asked for her for her forgiveness. I have not had any conversation with this ex girl friend again. She emailed me three time and I presses delete, delete, and the third time I replied "I'm married now". My wife know about this.
My wife also discovered I was watching porn from time to time. I was not an addiction. From time to time we would watch it together so I though it would be OK. I admitted to it, prayed that God would remove these erges, and he did. Today I have not been to any porn site. Prays God for that deliverance.
This explains why she has some distrust.
Your wife has falsely judged you, the Holy Spirit hasn't revealed anything to her. She also threatened that God would punish you for blasphemy, while she condemns an innocent man. She refused a polygraph while demanding that you comply? She has trust issues at the very least, and even if you passed a polygraph, it wouldn't satisfy her. She's condemned you with zero evidence, she's delusional and paranoid. Life's too short, run kr run.. jmo
