Gods The Only Consistent Thing I Have

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wantstogiveup

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From the time I was born until I turned 12 years old I was raised in church with God fearing parents. Things began to fall apart and my parents divorced and put God on the back burner. I didn't have parents to teach me the skills that I didn't in life. I didn't have anyone to take me to get my permit or license, buy me a car, take me to apply for jobs, and couldn't even go to school cause I was raising my siblings while my parents were off doing their own thing.
But one thing that they did teach me was The Bible. They taught me that the only thing good in me is God, that God is all I need. I'm still not book smart ALL I know is God and street life.
Even when I was drunk all I could think about was God. When I was high all I wanted was God. I've been through a lot. A lot of good things and a lot of bad. In the good times God was there. In the bad times God was there.
Because my parents didn't teach the things that I needed in life or cause they didn't hand me anything its caused me to get a rough start on life. I'm 20 years old and still don't have myllicense, I'm living with a friend, I barely finished High School, and I have nothing but a few outfits. But there's one things that I have always had. God. Sometimes I get angry with my parents because of the way my life turned out. But the only thing they taught me, the only thing that stuck in my head was the only thing that matters in life. God. For that I'm so thankful God is truly all I need.
 
You have what is most important in life. That being God.
God speaks to our hearts. This is not about being book smart. Some pastors speak of being lead by the Holy Spirit.
This is about learning and knowing when Jesus or the the Holy Spirit speaks to our hearts. Giving us warnings and direction in life.
 
wantstogiveup said:
From the time I was born until I turned 12 years old I was raised in church with God fearing parents. Things began to fall apart and my parents divorced and put God on the back burner. I didn't have parents to teach me the skills that I didn't in life. I didn't have anyone to take me to get my permit or license, buy me a car, take me to apply for jobs, and couldn't even go to school cause I was raising my siblings while my parents were off doing their own thing.
But one thing that they did teach me was The Bible. They taught me that the only thing good in me is God, that God is all I need. I'm still not book smart ALL I know is God and street life.
Even when I was drunk all I could think about was God. When I was high all I wanted was God. I've been through a lot. A lot of good things and a lot of bad. In the good times God was there. In the bad times God was there.
Because my parents didn't teach the things that I needed in life or cause they didn't hand me anything its caused me to get a rough start on life. I'm 20 years old and still don't have myllicense, I'm living with a friend, I barely finished High School, and I have nothing but a few outfits. But there's one things that I have always had. God. Sometimes I get angry with my parents because of the way my life turned out. But the only thing they taught me, the only thing that stuck in my head was the only thing that matters in life. God. For that I'm so thankful God is truly all I need.
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Bigger Jesus.jpg ​Jesus is bigger than any problem! :)
 
As totally unfortunate as your circumstances are, you may not have the relationship with God that you do if it had not happened. Just stay close to Him. He is all I have, I'm divorced and make poverty level money and have three children. I would never have made it or kept my sanity without the Lord.
 
We have to understand that parents are only human, just like you and I. We may be younger and mess up more often, but we often don't hear the side of what brokenness parents can have that they may not have intentionally wanted to bring onto their kids. We think that because they are our parents, they have to be the superheros and nothing they do will be flawed. A few nights ago I was thinking about a very similar thing as you. I was lucky to get by with education (up to high school) and I was never taught any useful life skills that many others at my age already had. No proper bond, especially with my father who I held and still sort of hold resentment towards for a few reasons. The only thing that I have is the clothes that aren't too many and access to get any type of support such as this. Both my parents work hard and while raising me and my disabled brother, you have to give some credibility that they still made it and stuck around. The complaints that siblings have when having siblings with disability is nothing compared to the silence and actions to make a living for them to raise someone like that. Kudos to all parents who have kids who even have debilitating illnesses and parents not even taking their kids for granted with such. They're the real saints.

While growing up there were some events that left me damaged. I started becoming depressive and a bit suicidal during my tween/start of teenage years since my mother who wouldn't admit to it had drinking problems that had us at a rough patch within our relationship. My father wasn't the type that gave support other than dreading with the job he had and this caused a lot of fights between my parents. Some things that were said and done still sting to this day, but I know I need to move on because they're done and not true. My mother apologized for the things she said to me, even when I was a little girl. The one who suffered the most was in fact my brother. I can't get over the guilt with how everything resulted for him and my mother still being in denial and thinks that the less you bring something up, the problem itself will die down.

We have to still be thankful that they still clothed and fed us along with having a roof over our heads. Not all parents do this. They are the ones who made us but not all of them are truly the parents that everyone deserves. Forgive for their shortcomings and try in any way to lift the burdens of their spirits and anything else we can be able to do to make their world while being parents a bit of a brighter place. They suppress their cries to help raise us.
 
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God is in the business of changing lives for the better........give Him the chance, and He will change yours as well.........
 
Dont worry, you are only 20. Plenty of time to still get a licence, and while your situation may seem like it will never improve and you are stuck, in my experience things can be like that for a while then all of a sudden God will do somthing and things will change quick.
 
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