I really don't understand why she thinks leaving me and small children is ok for 15 days I really really at wits end there are needy people here and her family is here
The reasons it isn't a good idea
1-not a safe place for a young mother with little kids
enough said
1-not a safe place for a young mother with little kids
enough said
she is a busy body; which can be good but for the first time she doesn't have kids at home with her our youngest (3) is in pre school and older ones are in school. Since then; only since September she has remodeled the kitchen on her own, signed up for this mission, have A young lady move in them short term, and catch up on a years worth of book keeping which she never does, also run 2 marathons
1) You seem to be quite fearful. Unless she is going to a war zone or somewhere where there is a disease epidemic (or has some sort of medical condition or food allergy that she needs to have close supervision of), there simply isn't a good reason to think she is significantly increasing her chances of death by going overseas. Hundreds if not thousands of people go on short term missions trips every year, the vast majority of them come back safe and sound and have no need for medical treatment while abroad (and you can by travel medical insurance fairly cheaply to cover that eventuality). Despite the waivers you sign deaths and injuries are quite rare.
2) Sounds like your wife may be having a difficult time adjusting to having hours at home with no kids around. You make it sound like she is doing a bazillion and one different things to try to fill up her time or maybe find some significance. Africa isn't going to solve this restlessness, but if it's the underlying factor in her desire to go, it is definitely worth talking about.
3) The fact that she signed up for an overseas trip either without talking to you about it or against your wishes is one of those red flags that all is not well in your relationship. This is the kind of thing that you should be talking about and in agreement on. Best thing you can do for both of you is go LISTEN to your wife. Unless you've been silent its a pretty good bet she knows you don't want her to go. So find out why she needs this so badly she is willing to defy you over it. Be humble about it because the trip is not the issue at this point; that you are willing to care for her and see to her needs and want her to know just how much you love and appreciate her and hate that this thing is causing friction is the real issue.
One other thing to discuss are the practical logistics of how the kids will be cared for, how what she usually does will get done during the two weeks she's away. Not knowing your wife she may have it all planned out already, or she may be caught up in an emotional high of "doing something big to serve God" and not have thought about the practicalities, but I will agree that it is still part of her responsibility as wife and mother to make sure this stuff is covered while she is away.
I'd also second the advice to talk to the trip leaders, both because they can probably reassure about the safety and security stuff they have in place, and because they should be aware of how much of a division this trip is causing in your marriage. I hope you can both get things worked out and come to agreement and be a stronger couple for it.