Sometimes I want to know Jesus has my back more and more.
And MORE.
So in reverse psychology, and in the way my character can be so very flawed I do something out of normal behavior...not like a test....but sort of.
I want to see more of his power in my life.
I don't want to settle with the mediocrity.
But ironically, with the world's perception it is the great idea that you continually fill yourself with the world....with idolatry.
The mediocre pleasures of life and the pursuits of selfish gain,
but knowing Christ is strictly the opposite.
It is the emptying of self,
but sometimes you feel like a folded up blanket after the big event at the picnic.
Everyone important, and by important I mean....everyone completely average like you or I...has already gone. They left! And you are all alone to face the heavy burden of cleaning everything up, no partner, no funny little monkey on your back to keep you company. Just you versus your heavy baggage.
And I hate that!
But Christ has been showing me something vital and important and wonderful about singlehood, you will have the best fruits brought forth in your life.
And stuff.
I don't know lol