Dating Criteria?

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J

jesukumar

Guest
#21
#21
Matthew, God has given u s wisdom to choose and neglect. And He ahs given us free will. SO to reign it we need to have certain stringent criteria but not be too legalistic about it. ANd this is why the kind of passive fatalism u advise ( wait on the Lord and He will provide etc) is not something I advocate. Becasue God has given us freedom in Christ to choose according to the Holy SPirit and wisdom. This knd of wisdom is not advocated anywhere int eh bIble. God expects us all to use His gifts in glorifying and obeying Him. He does not want us to be lik emules who have to be told and guided without their own volition. SO Matthew, get into the right relationship wiith God. Try to find out why u wanna get amrried etc and weigh ur motives. See what kind of girl u wnat and if it fits inGods WOrd and HAPPY HUNTING
 
M

Matthew

Guest
#22
#22
I'd like to make it clear that I am not trying to advocate passive fatalism, that wasn't my point at all.

I am not waiting for my partner to be be delivered to me with no effort on my part, I believe as you say we have to do our part in all areas of our lives, I am asking if having criteria that limits what we might consider is a good idea, because maybe if we get too concerned with what we don't want we might overlook someone who might be right for us.

For instance, I would rather not be with someone who smokes, but if I ever decide I absolutely won't date a woman that smokes I might miss out on someone amazing being in my life, and for all I know she might be wanting to quit but need some support but I never knew that because I dismissed her out of hand because she doesn't meet my requirements.
 
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L

Leilaii425

Guest
#23
#23
If im to be married, or to date anyone, i would like him to be shipped fed ex to my front door
 
C

chelsers

Guest
#24
#24
Me too! I haven't found a good mail order husband catalog yet though. I'm always on the lookout!
 
F

FixYourWeave

Guest
#25
#25
i have lowered all of my standards and am now looking through homeless shelters to find that special someone
 
M

Mordred

Guest
#26
#26
Dating Criteria:

You both work full time and only get to see each other when you're stressed out; after all a Man is stressed out after his physical work activity, and a Woman is stressed out after (well just about everything). So yelling and bickering at each other, is considering getting along (a healthy relationship).

If she does not dress appropiately when you go in public (or put on makeup for that matter), you should leave her at home. Men are usually considered studs though, even if they look sloppy (they still look good - we don't need makeup to go out =D )

If you've gotten this far, God Bless your soul - you have found a very good match. If she makes you sandwiches and brings you beer, you're in the money! (She will ask you to reach things for her and open things for her, RELAX! she's too short or too weak to do this herself, be nice for once :p)
 
G

greatkraw

Guest
#27
#27
I know plenty about christian dating sites and the christian girls there

they have a huge(read unrealistic) list of expectations and it does not occur to them that they are in fact quite ordinary
 
M

Mands

Guest
#28
#28
Matthew, I like this post. Thank you for sharing. I agree with you. I think God has everything very figured out, so I see it being pointless for me to make a checklist of what I think the person should be like. If he's already got it planned out for me, why should I worry about trival things such as height or build or age or something like that? God has us all in the palm of his hand, and he writes our love stories -- so I don't think we need a checklist -- when God brings along the one he's meant for us to be with, we'll know. And maybe we'll love more than once in our life. Maybe God doesn't have just one person for us to love...we never ever can be certain of his plans for us. If we keep our hearts focused on Him, then when he/she comes along, they'll be everything and more than we could have wished for. :)
 
Moviefan2k4

Moviefan2k4

Banned
#29
Mar 18, 2009
190
2
0
#29
I don't think that having a list of desires is sinful at all. Wanting certain qualities in a mate isn't wrong in itself, but using those wants as excuses or demands can quickly become sinful. The real question is, "Why do you want this?". Your answer to that on each issue will better determine your stances on all sorts of things.

For example, here's just the first few from my list (the full one is fairly long, so I won't include it all)...

1) She must have accepted Jesus as her Savior, and also posess a strong moral foundation.
2) She won't be unfairly critical, judgmental, or harsh, especially concerning the failures of others.
3) She'll be understanding and forgiving, yet not a "pushover" in any way.
4) She won't be afraid to hold me accountable for any foolishness or irrseponsibility on my part, and will expect the same in return.
5) She'll be brave and capable, yet minding of her foremost need for God, and secondary need for me to protect her as well.
6) My attempts to defend her honor won't be met with insult or offense.
7) She'll be both trusting and trustworthy in matters of love, loyalty, finance, and sex.
8) She'll be honest with me when I ask her questions, and won't resort to playing "mind games".
9) She won't allow herself to become excessively drunk.
10) She won't smoke (I've seen too many lives ruined by it).
 
MahogonySnail

MahogonySnail

Banned
#30
Jan 8, 2009
7,576
23
0
#30
i have lowered all of my standards and am now looking through homeless shelters to find that special someone
Click to expand...
That's why homeless people wear business suits.
 
MahogonySnail

MahogonySnail

Banned
#31
Jan 8, 2009
7,576
23
0
#31
I know plenty about christian dating sites and the christian girls there

they have a huge(read unrealistic) list of expectations and it does not occur to them that they are in fact quite ordinary
Click to expand...
Probably only slightly higher standards than the exclusive brethren.
 
G

greatkraw

Guest
#32
#32
MahogonySnail said:
Probably only slightly higher standards than the exclusive brethren.
Click to expand...
actually there has been a change

as well as the hot 20year olds from Nigeria I am getting emails from 20 year olds in USA?? complete with Hot pictures even an assurance that one is "broad minded"

things are looking up
 
MahogonySnail

MahogonySnail

Banned
#33
Jan 8, 2009
7,576
23
0
#33
Yeah there's probably heaps of women from third world countries like the USA wanting to get a free ride to a better life in Australia.
 
F

FixYourWeave

Guest
#34
#34
MahogonySnail said:
Yeah there's probably heaps of women from third world countries like the USA wanting to get a free ride to a better life in Australia.
Click to expand...

hahahahah usa a third world country!!
 
G

greatkraw

Guest
#36
#36
The great advantage we have is a Mandarin speaking Prime Minister kow towing to the chinese.
 
F

FixYourWeave

Guest
#37
#37
I wish i was chinese
 
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