what the qualities that GUYS looking for in a woman?

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gypsygirl

gypsygirl

Senior Member
Sep 19, 2012
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i find it really fascinating that we see (over and over) threads for the purpose of asking women what they want in a guy, what is attractive in a guy, or other similar questions intended to solicit women's opinions of what they are seeking in a potential husband.

however, i seldom (if ever) have seen a thread that is essentially asking the guys the opposite.

such as:

+ what do you guys find appealing and attractive in a woman?

+ what qualities are you guys seeking in a potential spouse?


what are your top 5 qualities that you're seeking? if you have more, by all means, list more.
 
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1. Heart for Christ
2. Compassion for others
3. Humor
4. Zeal for life
5. Desire for a strong family life
 
1. Modesty
2. Love for God
3. Wisdom
4. Modesty
5. Purity
6. Loyalty
7. Modesty
8. Aspiration
9. Beauty
10. Modesty
 
Actually, I was thinking about this on my way home from work. There are the obvious Christian answers, which are important, but kind of a given in this forum - at least I would hope they were.

For me, it's all about her approachability and openness. I don't think I would ask a lady out based on her looks alone ("Hey, you're pretty! Can I have your number?"). I would have to have some sort of interaction with her as well. Because of this, I see nothing wrong with asking out someone from my pool of friends. I am not a big believer in the whole "friend zone" thing, and I think most good friendships could handle an awkward question here and there. Besides, if the simple act of asking her out for a chance to get to know her better makes her so uncomfortable that she gets weirded out every time she sees me, then she wasn't that great a friend to begin with. Besides, she may be attracted to me as well, so...ya never know.

What I'm looking for from her once in the relationship (which I suspect is the heart of your question)?
I'm going to jump immediately to bad times. How is she when we disagree on something? Is she respectful? Does she call me names? Is it her way or the highway? Is she a pushover or a people-pleaser? passive-aggressive? Willing to compromise? Does she stop being affectionate if everything in her life is not perfect? Can she explain her view and try to understand mine as well? Her character in a disagreement speaks volumes. Most any woman can be pleasant during the good times. A woman who can be respectful and compassionate when things aren't going quite right is a rare gem.

supportive but not clingy - She is supportive of my hobbies and interests and sometimes participates with me. But she is her own person, and has interests of her own. I support her in these as well and participate in her interests on occasion. We have found a good balance and do not smother each other.

She is classy but unpretentious - She is equally comfortable with going to a symphony concert as she is getting on her #%^&-kicking boots and doing the Texas Two-Step.
 
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Of course I have most of the common likes, but I have a special place for a girl thats not afraid to go her own way..she kinda knows she is cool and so is not really looking for others to approve her...if that makes sense?

Easy to be around without always having to put on a mask or wondering what others think.
 
gypsygirl said:
+ what do you guys find appealing and attractive in a woman?

+ what qualities are you guys seeking in a potential spouse?


what are your top 5 qualities that you're seeking? if you have more, by all means, list more.
Click to expand...

1) Submissive

2) a good conversationalist

3) integrity

4) competent

5) organized
 
Sense of humor is big.
Intelligence.
Expressive and open.
Communicates well.
Encouraging.
Artistic/creative is a big plus.
Doesn't wear a lot of makeup.
Assertive.
Patient... those of you who know me can understand why =P

I'm sure there are more but that is a good list of what i find myself drawn to.
I bypassed anything spiritual because i feel it would only be redundant to state.
 
gypsygirl said:
i find it really fascinating that we see (over and over) threads for the purpose of asking women what they want in a guy, what is attractive in a guy, or other similar questions intended to solicit women's opinions of what they are seeking in a potential husband.

however, i seldom (if ever) have seen a thread that is essentially asking the guys the opposite.

such as:

+ what do you guys find appealing and attractive in a woman?

+ what qualities are you guys seeking in a potential spouse?


what are your top 5 qualities that you're seeking? if you have more, by all means, list more.
Click to expand...

Gypsygirl you are talking to dudes :)... easy to please.

Cook me dinner
Clean my plate
Bring me my TV remote
and ... :)

Just kidding...

what do you guys find appealing and attractive in a woman?

I knew I met my wife the moment I saw her. She was sparkling with an energy that I cannot describe. I was head over heels in love with her. Awesome laugh and great sense of humour. She is beautiful and I love her to bits :) bit more information than what you needed I am sure but that is the truth...

what qualities are you guys seeking in a potential spouse?

Honesty
Sense of humour and understand my sense of humour (I like teasing her)
Good mother to our son
Good cook (if she needs to be) and also allows me to do my thing with a braai (barbeque) week-ends
My best friend
God fearing :)
 
"however, i seldom (if ever) have seen a thread that is essentially asking the guys the opposite."

Whataya mean? I saw a thread about this in this very forum just a couple months ago.

Personally I think most guys don't really know (or don't want to acknowledge) what they're really looking for. Case in point:

quirky_girls.png


You know, like the heroines in romantic comedies... :rolleyes:
 
1. Christian
2. Charismatic
3. Conservative
4. Chaste
5. Active/Mobile(we can walk, jog, hike, play catch/tag, etc.)

In all instances, she gets reciprocation.
 
What I would like in a woman - and please note, this is from a guy who has never been on a date before, so this is all subjective and might be subject to change - are the following: A woman who...

- doesn't complain about stuff a lot. Sure, if something is wrong it should be mentioned (depending on the circumstances of course) but I know a lot of people, men and women, who seem to get satisfaction out of complaining about stuff at length, multiple times, to everyone they meet.

- knows how to correct someone with grace. There are right ways and wrong ways of telling someone "you're wrong." Sometimes it's as simple as taking a few moments to think about what you want to say and how to best phrase it, instead of just blurting out why you disagree with someone.

- has a sense of humor. Doesn't have to be exactly like my sense of humor, but for Pete's sake SOMETHING has to make her smile...

- doesn't find it funny to to tease animals. I know people who think it's hilarious to put a cat on a ceiling fan and turn it on low, and watch the cat hang on for dear life. I don't like those people much.

- has a decent vocabulary. Stopping to define words gets old for me and I imagine it makes her feel like she's dumb. I don't like making people feel like they're dumb but I also don't like having to restrict myself to words of two syllables.

- is not afraid to do something that is not technically her job. If she sees a piece of trash in the hall at church and she can't be bothered to pick it up because that's the job of whomever is cleaning the church this week, she's too busy for me.

As I said, I've never so much as been on a date before so any of these might be subject to change. Well... maybe. Some of them are absolutes. I think.
 
I also think I would like a woman who is good at talking to people. I'm realistic enough to know I'm not so good in that department myself. If I were married she would probably have to be the conversationalist if we were at a party.
 
- makes good sammiches
- likes cats
- likes to laugh and smile a lot
- worries about me a little (but not too much)
- ok with staying at home and having interesting conversations about anything and everything
- has a kind heart

(ok the sammiches one was a joke)
 
1. passionate (about her beliefs and interests)
2. good with kids (since I have three already, it wouldn't do to marry a wicked witch)
3. Sense of humor (if she can keep up with my sarcasm, and retaliate...I'm in love)
4. physically attractive (No, I don't think this is shallow. I don't want a smoking hot supermodel wife, a woman can have natural beauty without looking skanky thank you, and it's hard to be with someone I think is ugly)
5.intelligent (I love the bible, I love reading theology, nothing would give me more joy than to be able to have an intellectual conversation with someone I would be dating/getting engaged to/possibly marrying/marrying)

and if she loves music and has red hair, those are bonus points
 
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