My marriage is in trouble

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M

mineis

Guest
#21
#21
He doesn't trust me. He does work hard.
 
notuptome

notuptome

Senior Member
#22
May 17, 2013
15,050
2,538
113
#22
mineis said:
He doesn't trust me. He does work hard.
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Then he cannot trust because he is not trustworthy.

Still sounds like he hardly works.

For the cause of Christ
Roger
 
M

mineis

Guest
#23
#23
To be honest it does not bother me that he works part time. I am mora annoyed with the complaining. Thank you all for being willing to hear me.
 
M

mystikmind

Guest
#24
#24
mineis said:
To be honest it does not bother me that he works part time. I am mora annoyed with the complaining. Thank you all for being willing to hear me.
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Part of it could be as simple as this.... 'the best form of defense is attack' and he may not even realize he is doing it, but subconsciously he will.
 
M

mineis

Guest
#25
#25
Defense oh I see. I don't attack him. I don't see a reason to want to cause a fight. I have to think about what could cause this trigger. "You are your own worst critic? "
 
R

RememberTheSabbathDay

Banned
#26
Nov 30, 2013
682
10
0
#26
mineis said:
Ok,

I have never expressed myself about my marriage to anyone. I don't want my family or friends to be mad at my husband. He resently said he feels like there no love in our marriage. He works a part time job and I work full time occasionally overtime when available. I feel like I have to support the family. He complains that we don't spend time together. We had recently spent a romantic weekend. However my husband said he did not feel anything when we were intimate. When he said that it crushed me. I had told him to pray about how he was feeling. I pray for our relationship often. Sadly when I buy him things he gets very happy. In addition he says that I don't help him enough. What do I do?
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Mineis,


Open the scriptures to your husband and remind him who God chose to be the head and not the tail of the house hold. A hus-band bands around and protects the family. The problem isn't you its him. He has to make his own happiness. Looks like he really don't understand what it takes to hold a marriage together. The best answer that you can give your husband is not a fun exciting trip cause this will wear off but back to the Bible is where he should go to understand what it means to be a man and a God fearing husband. Put the responsibility back in his lap. He wants you to be responsible for everything. Pray that God will shake some sense into him. Love him and pray for him but don't be his door mat. An idol minds is the devils work shop. Don't let your husband dictate who he sees you to be in his mind's eye. Its obvious that he does not know the real meaning of love. This too he will find in God's word. Remind him he made a promise to God and man for better or for worse.
 
M

mystikmind

Guest
#27
#27
mineis said:
Defense oh I see. I don't attack him. I don't see a reason to want to cause a fight. I have to think about what could cause this trigger. "You are your own worst critic? "
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There are allot of different things that can make a person 'defensive' other than an obvious 'attack'. It may be enough just for him to know (or imagine) what you are thinking even though you don't say anything. It could be that and or he could even be defensive against his own conscience!
 
M

mineis

Guest
#28
#28
Thank you everyone. Sometimes it is to have perspective when you are directly in the situation. You have given me clarity. God bless you all.
 
M

mineis

Guest
#29
#29
hank you everyone. Sometimes it is hard to have perspective when you are directly in the situation. You have given me clarity. God bless you all.
 
N

NewWine

Guest
#30
#30
mineis said:
Defense oh I see. I don't attack him. I don't see a reason to want to cause a fight. I have to think about what could cause this trigger. "You are your own worst critic? "
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I think that goes along with him possibly passing his own inadequacies onto you. He's feeling bad about himself, so he picks a fight so instead of feeling bad about himself, he feels bad about the fight....at least that is a tangible reason to be upset. I can't say this is what he's doing, but I do have a feeling that he's not happy with himself and seeking to find his joy in you. He needs to realize that humans will disappoint us and leave gaps in our needs, that's where God's love comes into fill those gaps. He never disappoints us. He never leaves us, nor threatens to leave. He never gives us a reason to doubt Him. People do. Once each person realizes this simple thing about God....other things start to make more sense to us, and we begin to feel more peaceful about life in general. In my own experience this is how it worked anyways?
 
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