L
Hello,
I am new here I just need support. I was diagnosed with CML Leukemia in January. I have to take oral chemo for the rest of my life. I was dealing pretty well while taking the first one once I switched to the second pill that I will be on for the duration I became depressed and have things that bother me all day every day one in particular that I would really like to go away.
About a year and a half before my diagnosis I left my job of almost 8 years for a new job. On the job I left I was salary I so my sick days didn't effect my vacation days. Within the first year into the second job I had an auto accident and was off for a week for a week I thought about the previous job but I was fine I didn't think about it after that. Since my leukemia diagnosis and starting the new medicine I have so much regret for leaving the other job. The reason I left was because the two people I reported to talked to me really nasty for years and I could not get any continuing education training and they wouldn't give me all of the tools that I needed to do my job, I was on call all of the time but that wasn't so bad but I had gotten to the point of having a bad attitude due to the treatment I had endured. I considered the fact that I was salary before leaving but I have always been pretty healthy and didn't take off much. I get 18 pto days at my new job but I now don't have a lot of days left for the rest of the year. Like my new job but can't get the thoughts of the other job out of my head and how I should have stayed there and just dealt with the bad treatment and the lack of consideration for my career.
I know I can't go back and change anything I truly believe that if I was still there I would want to leave. I know that every year won't be like this yet I just can't let it go. I have prayed about it so hard, I read scripture, I have cried about it, talked about it and it just won't go away. My husband said that he thinks that God didn't want me there with my illness and that is why he allowed for me to leave before this happened. I just want to move on and deal with my illness but this is driving me crazy.
I am new here I just need support. I was diagnosed with CML Leukemia in January. I have to take oral chemo for the rest of my life. I was dealing pretty well while taking the first one once I switched to the second pill that I will be on for the duration I became depressed and have things that bother me all day every day one in particular that I would really like to go away.
About a year and a half before my diagnosis I left my job of almost 8 years for a new job. On the job I left I was salary I so my sick days didn't effect my vacation days. Within the first year into the second job I had an auto accident and was off for a week for a week I thought about the previous job but I was fine I didn't think about it after that. Since my leukemia diagnosis and starting the new medicine I have so much regret for leaving the other job. The reason I left was because the two people I reported to talked to me really nasty for years and I could not get any continuing education training and they wouldn't give me all of the tools that I needed to do my job, I was on call all of the time but that wasn't so bad but I had gotten to the point of having a bad attitude due to the treatment I had endured. I considered the fact that I was salary before leaving but I have always been pretty healthy and didn't take off much. I get 18 pto days at my new job but I now don't have a lot of days left for the rest of the year. Like my new job but can't get the thoughts of the other job out of my head and how I should have stayed there and just dealt with the bad treatment and the lack of consideration for my career.
I know I can't go back and change anything I truly believe that if I was still there I would want to leave. I know that every year won't be like this yet I just can't let it go. I have prayed about it so hard, I read scripture, I have cried about it, talked about it and it just won't go away. My husband said that he thinks that God didn't want me there with my illness and that is why he allowed for me to leave before this happened. I just want to move on and deal with my illness but this is driving me crazy.