Here's a question militant atheists
love to ask. I was surprised when I realised the simplicity of the actual answer.
Question: If God is omnipotent, then can he make a stone to heavy for him to lift?
Seems like an impossible to answer scenario right?
Answer: He can do both simultaneously. He can make a stone too heavy for him to lift, that he can lift. Impossible you say?
Well, it's God we're talking about here. He can do
anything. Not some man bound by logic.
[Before you nitpickers get in, yes I know God cannot lie, etc.]
How can one conclude that the solution is simple if the solution is beyond logic? In fact, what does it mean for something to be "beyond logic"? Do you mean there is logic, it's just counter-intuitive to what we understand? And by which measures do we dictate counter-intuitive claims to be true?
You see, the moment God lifts an object that is too heavy for himself to lift - it ceases to be too heavy for God to lift by the very definition given to us. Saying God can do it outside our understanding just isn't enough.
But don't fret, there are some solutions to this "paradox", you just need to know how to address it.
Solution 1: The Dual God Solution
God first creates a large stone that he is able to lift. He then clones himself in which he limits the powers of said clone. The clone shall be similar to God in every way except he shall lack the ability to lift the stone, change the properties of the stone, or change his own properties so that he may lift the stone. Although the clone is technically not omnipotent, it is still a clone of God and therefore it solves the problem...
... unless an atheist tells you that you haven't solved the problem because the omnipotent God is still able to lift the stone, redirecting the problem to the omnipotent God. If this is the case, we can move onto....
Solution 2: The Many-Worlds God
The Many-Worlds God solution is named after the Many-Worlds interpretation of certain elements of Quantum Mechanics. I originally wanted to call this the Double-God experiment, named after the Double-Split experiment in the field of Quantum Mechanics, but I realized the name wouldn't make much sense. So I called it the Many-Worlds God solution because the Many Worlds interpretation will probably explain this anyway. I don't know anything about Quantum Mechanics, but it sounds smart.
If you're familiar with the Double-Split experiment, you'll know that it probably has something to do with the way in which light and matter behaves depending on whether it's being observed.
For this solution, you propose that God creates a large stone that he can not lift. It would appear that he is not omnipotent since he has limited himself. But, when nobody is looking, he can pick up the stone and move it elsewhere. As soon as someone looks, the stone is either already moved or God drops it. I think this is how quantum physics works.
And if anyone argues that God is still not omnipotent because he can not lift the stone while being observed, then I propose the 3rd and final solution.
Solution 3: Nothing Can Be Known Solution aka Schrodinger's God.
Note that God can create a very heavy stone. If someone claims to see him either lift the stone, or fail to lift the stone, remind them that it's possible their eyes could be deceiving them. They could be hallucinating, having their sight manipulated by Satan, or any other number of possible reasons why their eyes might be deceiving them. Just argue that because it is impossible to verify what was seen actually happened, it must be assumed that God can and can not lift the stone at the same time due to the possibility that our eyes may deceive us - making it unknown. Hence, the solution being referred to as Schrodinger's God.
The best part is, you don't need to know anything about Quantum Physics or Tautology to use these arguments! In fact, learning Quantum Physics and Tautology may render these arguments void.
(This comment is satirical. No offense intended.)