Should we be advocating divorce?
- Thread starter Olerica
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T
Im confused and thanks um....
I'm glad you mention this because I've been disturbed by it as well.
It's easy for any of us to flippantly tell a poster or chatter here that they should just "divorce the so-and-so and get on with your life." We are not subject to any kind of (immedidate) accountability for these words. Additionally, there is no onus to spiritually support the person or walk with them through their suffering.
It's really reckless.
Plus, some of the people who advocate quick divorce here have never even been married.
I agree with you that if we are to actually BE the Body of Christ, we need to support our fellow members who are suffering. We need to pray for those whose marriages are imploding. We need to implore them to seek PROFESSIONAL counsel with a therapist or pastor. We need to make sure that they have a real life support system available to them in the midst of their trial.
What we don't need to do is presume much knowledge based on a brief post and dispense flip advice for which we will have to answer to God.
It's easy for any of us to flippantly tell a poster or chatter here that they should just "divorce the so-and-so and get on with your life." We are not subject to any kind of (immedidate) accountability for these words. Additionally, there is no onus to spiritually support the person or walk with them through their suffering.
It's really reckless.
Plus, some of the people who advocate quick divorce here have never even been married.
I agree with you that if we are to actually BE the Body of Christ, we need to support our fellow members who are suffering. We need to pray for those whose marriages are imploding. We need to implore them to seek PROFESSIONAL counsel with a therapist or pastor. We need to make sure that they have a real life support system available to them in the midst of their trial.
What we don't need to do is presume much knowledge based on a brief post and dispense flip advice for which we will have to answer to God.
And I think we should be careful to not let our own experience color our response before praying that we are granting God's best counsel. I believe that God still performs miracles in lives and marriages. He wouldn't honor how he holds them sacred if he didn't.
One we of our jobs as spouses is to intercede for our spouse... And that never ends.
im STILL not advocating abuse.
One we of our jobs as spouses is to intercede for our spouse... And that never ends.
im STILL not advocating abuse.
A
I know. In part, you're the reason I am a member. I was looking up something I found in the Bible that wasn't explained well enough by my Dead Guys, so I googled. It seems you asked that same question sometime last year, so this site showed up. Never did get a full answer to my question, (there isn't one, at least, not in this lifetime), but joined this site. lol
B
Advocating,no. But as sad as it is there are Christians who are. And whether the Bible approves of the situation or ourselves as believers,they need the same respect as anyone else. Beyond that is a matter between the couple,God and preacher, and the right action depends on situation.
I myself am against divorce and err on the Bible. Doesn't mean I'm going to be disrespectful even if honest about things.
I myself am against divorce and err on the Bible. Doesn't mean I'm going to be disrespectful even if honest about things.
--as a divorced woman, I can say, absolutely, that at Christians we should not be advocating divorce. When marriage dies, it is horribly painful, for everyone involved. I believe that God can restore anything. I also believe people have free will, will make poor decisions, and that God allows divorce, eventhough it is painful. He can create goodness out of tragedy.
I do think it is important not to condemn those who are divorced (so don't condemn me!) One of my struggles after I seperated was this feeling that I needed to share with others about what went wrong in my marriage, mostly so people wouldn't condemn me-- at the same time, I didn't want to lambaste my husband (now ex) in the small community where we live, where my children will grow up. I wanted people to make their own judgements about him, and not judge him from what I shared about him.
Before I experienced divorced, I was VERY judgemental in my heart against others who were divorced; without even knowing it!! God is teaching me through this process-- I have grown in my faith exponentially. I think it was Joni Eareckson who said, "Our God is bigger [meaning he is revealed to those who live with suffering] because we need him more"
I am so sorry if you got the impression that I was condemning. I AM NOT. I just am concerned when I see thread after thread of people being advised to divorce. YES, we are given a Biblical reason when divorce is acceptable, however, I still think we should be encouraging our brothers and sisters to forgive and win back their spouses if at all possible.
I'm not advocating for abuse and that one should stay in a marriage just because, but I think it's dangerous to advise, "just divorce" and "he/she will never change". God does change hearts. And it says that the reason divorce is granted is because of hardness of hearts.
Please, please, please hear that I am not condemning, but encouraging the advisers on these threads to prayerfully consider if the advise they are giving is what they should be giving.
I'm not advocating for abuse and that one should stay in a marriage just because, but I think it's dangerous to advise, "just divorce" and "he/she will never change". God does change hearts. And it says that the reason divorce is granted is because of hardness of hearts.
Please, please, please hear that I am not condemning, but encouraging the advisers on these threads to prayerfully consider if the advise they are giving is what they should be giving.
GOD is the one who knows everything. He knows if you situation should result in divorce. Remember with all the arguments we give we cannot lie to the TRUTH. JESUS said divorce was only allowed if there is infidelity and even in that case it is for hardness of heart sake that it is allowed. This said to me that every opportunity to salvage a marriage should be explored before finally giving up. Only GOD will knows if you have truly maxed out your options.
Do all things through prayer.
Abide in peace
Do all things through prayer.
Abide in peace