Pretty much, and maybe it's because I know I would not let such horrific things happen if I had the power to stop it.
Yes, it is heartbreaking, isn't it? If I were God, no one would starve, we'd all have enough, pain would be eradicated, there'd be no abuse - sexual or otherwise. If I were God, we'd all love each other well, preferring each other over being right... and so much more.
I'm sure you've seen things in your life, I've seen things in mine. And as tough as the things have been that I have personally experienced: the abuse, neglect, heartbreak, grief, loneliness, victimization... these things I know for a fact have drawn me closer to God and my deep realization that I know I need his intervention in my life. Sure, there's been a lot of happy in my life too - I'm not wholly broken; but the difficulties are what have drawn me into relationship because I see God's comfort, love, tenderness, and by far the least: salvation and relationship.
You and I can only see the picture from our perspective. Thankfully, God sees in an eternal sense. I don't know why and how he works the way he does, because in the moment I can only see the moment. I can only see what I can see.
Gary, I know this is a hard place...but have you taken your frustration and anger and poured it out to him? And after you have, do you sit back and listen to what he might be saying? I think God does allow us to have dissatisfaction, anger, regret, troubles so that we do seek him.
I don't really have all the answers. Honestly, that's the only answer I have: Seek God. So simple, so complicated, so frustrating and so fulfilling.
I'll be praying. I hope when God gives you insight, as I know he will do as he promises: to give us wisdom when we ask (James 1)...anyway, I hope that when you are given insight, you will come back and share with us the revelation you've been given. I believe God wants to show us his heart, and engage him in our search for answers. Blessings to you.
(and don't think I've dismissed the discussion either. this is just where I'm at with this)