So how about telling the TRUTH about what suicide does? So you KNOW your husband believed he was saving you from pain and heartache??? WHAT did his self-centered selfishness REALLY CAUSE..... 3 years now??? So your husband excused himself from life and responsibility to "save" everyone else pain and heartache.... now he is gone and what did were the consequences he left behind.... PAIN AND HEARTACHE.
Tell the WHOLE TRUTH... don't gloss over and allude to your pain and problems whilst making excuses for your husband's suicide. Your husband was SELFISH irrespective of any other factors... it doesn't take much for the powers of darkness to push a selfish-self centered mind into sin any sin. FEAR of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom... and I am certain it is a safety line that holds back the "struggling" regarding suicide or other sin unto death.
You really are an unpleasant person, do you know that? Your tone here and other places I have seen you post lacks empathy, which is what I was attempting to grace you with.
I wasnt talking about my pain.... I told WW that very few understand the daily struggle that many suicidial people have. The day, after day, after day, after day, after day of being battered by all sorts of thoughts. You might consider that it's mental illness that typically goes untreated because of the stigma of treatment, and the ability to hide the pain from public view.
and yes, he never hid his struggle from me once it was revealed. Though I have discovered after the fact that I was the only one who knew. Yes, I tried to get him help, but I loved him wholly, and I vowed at the beginning to stay no matter what... Sickness AND health, forsaking ALL others... Till death do us part. And I held my vows lovingly and passionately
can you please take a step out of your need to be 'right' and talk about this gently with people who struggle with this temptation (as Jesus was tempted...and did not sin), and with those who have survived their own attempts (God is so gracious), and those like me who are mourning a huge loss; or is your need to be right, rigid, and without compassion to other THAT much more important?
do you really think that the God of the universe, I Am that I Am; who sent his Son to die this brutal death to pay for all sin, excludes suicide? When we are saved, when we accept the gift that Jesus bought for EACH of us for ALL of our sins, it covered all sin from that moment before and ALL moments afterwards until we are perfected.
No, that doesn't give us permission to sin, but it covers them all. Or do you think that the Omnicient One somehow didn't anticipate that sin? His grace is sufficient.
i do pray for those who struggle with depression, with suicidial thoughts, AND with temptation of all sorts (myself included) that we all behave in a way worthy of the calling of salvation.... I also pray for those not yet under the law of grace, that they find their hope and salvation in Jesus Christ our Lord.
you told me not to gloss this over, and I didn't. I suffer like EVERY OTHER WIDOW. Some widows lose their spouses through disease that lingers (which is the category I see myself in), some loss happens quickly, some at an old age....it doesn't matter. It's still your best friend and lover being torn from your arms and life. I have other widow friends... Grief is grief.
God is greater that this. He is our comfort, our rest. His grace is sufficient even for this. He is faithful even in this. Even if I mourn for the rest of my life here, without the comfort of a husband (a new one... The first is not returning) God is enough. He promises to meet all of my needs and I am well provided for.
The whole of it is? His death allowed me to own my house and my business. It freed me from the fear I would find him gone when I returned from...anywhere. It freed me from the deep emotional burden of propping up my beloved for one more brutal day... And it was a task I would have done forever. It freed me to heal. Freed me to find new love (should I be so blessed), and to be loved again as he loved me....without guilt or worry that I had broken my vows.... Yes, all of that came, no...comes with the price of grief. He believed he was giving his life so I as his wife, would be free for so much better. He gave his life for me because he knew that caring for him was killing me. I wholeheartedly understand this sacrifice. Would I trade it all for him to be here? I would say yes, but I see God working in this space too... I see God being glorified.
please pray before you respond