It's been 2 weeks now and I have not had contacted her at all but she still e-mails me and texts on facebook (I have muted all of them however and not responded to them . ) I'm now wondering if i did the right thing by leaving her although she was verbally and emotionally abusive there are also good sides to her as well . The temptation to reconnect back with her is so strong ..
Temptation to reconnect
- Thread starter christianguitarist
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U
Sounds like a good idea. If you want to throw your life away and spend your life as a doormat. Not to mention the potential for physical abuse. She won't change. Everything she did before she will continue to do if you reconnect. Maybe more.
What crack are you smoking that you think getting her back would be a good idea?
Pit bulls can have good sides too, but if they chew your face off when they get mad are you going to keep it? You're being blind and foolish.
Not or trying to be mean, but you kind of needed a slap in the face.
What crack are you smoking that you think getting her back would be a good idea?
Pit bulls can have good sides too, but if they chew your face off when they get mad are you going to keep it? You're being blind and foolish.
Not or trying to be mean, but you kind of needed a slap in the face.
M
I'm sorry CG. But I think it's normal to romanticize people after we let them go...okay I wouldn't know but I assume that's what happens. haha
Anyways you have to worry about yourself, not this girl. Didn't you say she would take money from you and abuse you verbally? You think God is happy with you living like that? He wants the best for his children. You deserve a girl who's going to treat you right and is respectful to you.
Don't waste time thinking about the past or wondering if you made the right decision. You know you did. Think of it this way: If she's using you for money, she doesn't really love you and will eventually leave. So it's best to do the hard part (getting over her) right now and not later when you're more involved with her.
I hope I helped. God bless you, brother!
Anyways you have to worry about yourself, not this girl. Didn't you say she would take money from you and abuse you verbally? You think God is happy with you living like that? He wants the best for his children. You deserve a girl who's going to treat you right and is respectful to you.
Don't waste time thinking about the past or wondering if you made the right decision. You know you did. Think of it this way: If she's using you for money, she doesn't really love you and will eventually leave. So it's best to do the hard part (getting over her) right now and not later when you're more involved with her.
I hope I helped. God bless you, brother!
A
I just chant my mantra "call of duty, advanced warfare" and immediately transfer my physical body to the xbox. It wards off all evil female spirits. It works great, but I am happy being perpetually single. Married guys, sorry.....this will NOT turn out well for you 
#bachelor privelege
#bachelor privelege
S
I have an ex that was not abusive, but she was apt to exhibit disrespect and a lack of gratitude, yet I still think about her from time to time. When you have feelings for someone (assuming you do anymore, which I am), even someone that isn't good to/for you, it's difficult sometimes to move on.
It sounds like some time and distance is still a necessary thing for you, though.
It sounds like some time and distance is still a necessary thing for you, though.
T
I just chant my mantra "call of duty, advanced warfare" and immediately transfer my physical body to the xbox. It wards off all evil female spirits. It works great, but I am happy being perpetually single. Married guys, sorry.....this will NOT turn out well for you #bachelor privelege
#bachelor privelege
Hey CG, I am sorry to hear about your dilemma. Let me share a personal experience with you.
My first relationship was with my childhood sweetheart. She was from my church and not only did we like each other, but a future looked realistic between us. However, she was not a pleasant person. I was in an emotionally-abusive relationship which costed me my friends and nearly also my career. Eventually, I had to walk out of that relationship, even though I was the one who had invested more in it.
A year and a half later, she got in touch with me in order to restart things. She profusely apologized for her behaviour and she was willing to give me the time and the space to get back with her. For a couple of weeks, I did give it a shot. But that was when I realized that the hurt from the past was so strong that it held me back from committing to the relationship for the second time. I had to sever things once and for all, with a heavy heart, after realizing that the best days of our relationship were already over.
I can relate to your dilemma and I think I understand why you want to go back to her. But here are two reasons why I don't think you should do it - 1) If she took a lot out of you the first time, she will probably do it again the second time too; 2) Even if you give in and get back with her, there will come a point when you realize that you do not feel the same way about her anymore. The feeling that you don't love her the same is worse than not being with her at all.
Take our word of advice and do not make that mistake, my friend.
My first relationship was with my childhood sweetheart. She was from my church and not only did we like each other, but a future looked realistic between us. However, she was not a pleasant person. I was in an emotionally-abusive relationship which costed me my friends and nearly also my career. Eventually, I had to walk out of that relationship, even though I was the one who had invested more in it.
A year and a half later, she got in touch with me in order to restart things. She profusely apologized for her behaviour and she was willing to give me the time and the space to get back with her. For a couple of weeks, I did give it a shot. But that was when I realized that the hurt from the past was so strong that it held me back from committing to the relationship for the second time. I had to sever things once and for all, with a heavy heart, after realizing that the best days of our relationship were already over.
I can relate to your dilemma and I think I understand why you want to go back to her. But here are two reasons why I don't think you should do it - 1) If she took a lot out of you the first time, she will probably do it again the second time too; 2) Even if you give in and get back with her, there will come a point when you realize that you do not feel the same way about her anymore. The feeling that you don't love her the same is worse than not being with her at all.
Take our word of advice and do not make that mistake, my friend.
Is there something in your past that allows you to excuse this type of behavior?
I wouldn't be a bad idea for you to get into a Christian counseling group because, I fear that you will make this same mistake with the next woman that you get involved with. Many times people unconscientiously choose the same destructive behaviors one after the other when it comes to seeking a friends and mates many times due to the atmosphere in which we were raised.
Your are not beyond being physically abused or even killed as women are killed by their abusers.
Do yourself a favor and live that abundant life that Jesus died to give all. Don't waste the blood of Christ on Satan.
Unless the Lord build the house, they labor in vain that build it. Psalm 127:1
Sorry to hear about this.
christian, I was talking to a few people yesterday about these kind of situations. We don't realize that we need to set up healthy boundaries by walking away or by saying "no." Let your yes be yes, and your no's be no's. By saying "no" to this relationship, you're not promising anything to anyone. It allows you to walk away and you're saying "no" to this relationship. It's a boundary. It protects you and it protects the other person by not making empty promises to them. Does this make sense? It is pretty early where I'm at, so my thoughts are not being formulated to the best of my ability, haha.
Sure, the temptation is strong. I totally understand that. My last relationship, all I wanted to do was text him. But I looked at my worth and I looked at the toxic relationship that I was in and said to myself, "I don't deserve it. Would Jesus treat me like that? Would the men that are in my life treat me like he treated me?" Thankfully, God has blessed me with many people in my life that treat me wonderful...and I used them as well as God to set that standard of how this guy should have been treating me. And he wasn't treating me like someone who meant anything. I walked away.
You are a son of Christ. You're loved and cherished I'll be praying for you, friend!
christian, I was talking to a few people yesterday about these kind of situations. We don't realize that we need to set up healthy boundaries by walking away or by saying "no." Let your yes be yes, and your no's be no's. By saying "no" to this relationship, you're not promising anything to anyone. It allows you to walk away and you're saying "no" to this relationship. It's a boundary. It protects you and it protects the other person by not making empty promises to them. Does this make sense? It is pretty early where I'm at, so my thoughts are not being formulated to the best of my ability, haha.
Sure, the temptation is strong. I totally understand that. My last relationship, all I wanted to do was text him. But I looked at my worth and I looked at the toxic relationship that I was in and said to myself, "I don't deserve it. Would Jesus treat me like that? Would the men that are in my life treat me like he treated me?" Thankfully, God has blessed me with many people in my life that treat me wonderful...and I used them as well as God to set that standard of how this guy should have been treating me. And he wasn't treating me like someone who meant anything. I walked away.
You are a son of Christ. You're loved and cherished
I'll be praying for you, friend!